Craig Clevenger Returns To The Cult!

sweet cheek meat.  i'm locked and loaded. 

Of course this comes when I'm moving to a new apartment...ah well, I'll always have Max Barry...

Get in while you can, Culties! You won't regret it!

I need to stop being poor for these things...

Having taken part in the last one, I would fully urge you to get into debt to be a part of this. Sign up! Really, this kind of thing is... well, it's not once-in-a-lifetime, but it's like, you know, once you do a Clevenger intensive nothing will ever be the same again, like losing a body function, only the opposite - gaining a body function, having another arm or the ability to read minds. That's right, sign up and Craig will teach you to read minds! Get a loan, borrow money from a family member or friend, this right here verges on the divine. Really.

Really, though, jump right on signing up. Don't leave it for an hour. Mark builds a steady and luxurious ship that Craig sails with all the captaining skills of Ahab, and the white whale is literary perfection. Only you know, without the whole death and drowning kind of thing.

For an idea of what you're in for, click here.

This is why I would love to have

A The abilty to write

B Monies

C Confidence to take part in an Intensive.

Good Luck to everyone that takes part.

word.  apply for a paypal credit line..

apply for a loan, put your BMX up for collateral.  literally, as i procured a seat in the last hotseat intensive, i had just slid into a seat another person was trying to bump into.  what i mean is, every minute matters and dont regret this minute.  when it comes to three hundred dollars, that is a fucking steal.  i mean, a six week class instructed by the remarkable craig clevenger--how many newer authors in this world, when beginning to query stories and craft a novel to sell, can say, quite literally, they were instructed by craig clevenger ?

in order to attend the last hotseat, I sold a fucking payload of books from my shelves to participate, many of which I am still, currently re buying one at a time.  in fact, just sunday i ordered another hard cover of [i]dairy[/i]--it’s so weird that i haven’t read any pages from that novel in approx. one year.  just got back the viking editions of baer’s first two books maybe a few weeks ago.  I currently have another hardcover of clev’s [i]handbook[/i] in my amazon shopping cart and I’ll facilitate that order in the next few weeks or so.  I sold off everything, everything I could regain later, because I knew that the class would be invaluable to me as a learning writer.

The last hotseat:

Clevenger offers a unique perspective on the art of storytelling, and he’s anal as fuck when it comes to writing, when it comes to writing properly grammar wise and when it comes to making certain shit IS happening, making certain there IS change.  Can’t have a chapter without some form of change, and he’ll explain why.  He’ll go over power struggles, from the power stuggles we all experience every day in life to the ones strangers show through the glass of car windows as we pass a house or sitting across the bar. pretty much, the whole white whale of turning characters into real people.  He’ll go over his thoughts on the difference in the writing between his first two novels and what he disliked about the writing in the [i]Handbook[/i].  You’ll also obtain his unique perspective on gauging your work editorially, including his tricks--the ones he himself came up with--on how, during the last, full edit, to make certain no mistakes are made or left in.  you’ll also get perspective on how novels are edited, an idea of the working relationship between a novelist and that novelist’s editor.  He’ll also--and I loved this part--pick two books apart and restructure them right in front of you, a complete deconstruction and rebuild of the merits between five and six thousand words, which, in printed pages, comes to fifteen or sixteen pages of reading per book.  

So.  Sell something.  Borrow from your boss or an ex-lover.  Anything you can do short of robbing a bank or old people.  Definitely take this opportunity seriously.  This class will run out of room quite soon.

-kabol

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.

.

A You have the ability to write and write well

and

C Trust me, you have the confidence needed, Derek.  Barca is a part of your realtime personality, not just a façade

/my opinion

I'm in.

The avatar's obvious, but i'm Flash over on The Velvet.

no way !

nice, flash.  i wish i was a part of this even more now.  i'm staying on the sidelines this round, but just so everyone knows..

i think this intensive will prove to be a superior hotseat being that clev's already done one and the experience of doing it once before is on his side.

so good luck, work hard and then work harder.  all of that.

and congrats !!

kabol

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Paypal is giving me a 404 error after I etner all my information and hit pay now. I've tried twice. What to do?!

how is this? I don't see a price anywhere but i remember the last one being a significant chunk of change (well to me at least)

Thank for the support, Kabol.

It's $325 through tomorrow, $350 after. I didn't have any PayPal issues this morning (Firefox). Surely it's not sold out yet; I'd think we'd be hearing more noise on the forum/comments if so.

Great, more writing I can do thats not going to get critiqued.

You're awfully bitter gmail guy.  I understand why of course.

First off its Gmail MAN alright?  I didnt spend nine years acquiring a white belt to be placated by some punk on the internet.  Secondly, I think I'm an appropriate amount of bitter.

You should of just stuck with the Gmail thing.  EyesLikeHoles is barely better.  

Damn, I wish I had the time and money.   i could find the required talent, surely.

How mouch time do assignments and stuff take? 

Would it still be worth it if i haven't done any writing lately? 

i wouldn't have anything to edit and i'd be starting from scratch.

Starting from scratch is preferred, actually; i.e., it's better to write to the assignment than to retool something you've had sitting around to kinda, sorta fit the assignment.  An intensive should always help you generate new words.

Each individual assignment is typically in the neighborhood of 1,200 to 1,500 words, and you get about three days to submit it.

Gmail MAN just sounds ridiculous.  And don't they give you the white belt for showing up for the first lesson? 

But seriously, I'd be pissed off too. And I won't call you names anymore, I don't want to get my ass kicked or anything.

I really really fucking wish there was any way I could afford this.  I'm busy right now, but this is the kind of thing that you shuffle around, well, everything to make time for.  I think I'll go by the used book stores tomorrow, see if I can scrape up a few hundred dollars for textbooks, but that's just really doubtful, especially since the whole rebuying books thing has a reputation for being a scam.  Maybe I'll sell my liver and/or body on the streets?  Hmmm.

Anyway, since I'll probably have to sit this one out, you guys enjoy. It's really an amazing opportunity.

best

intensive

ever

Dammit, Richard, you're taunting me every site I go to.  Maybe I should discover more than two websites.

well...here's i go again, PF - i'm in, can't pass it up - no time or money, but i'll find both 

I haven't missed an intensive yet (I believe that's nine now).  However, I am about a month away from finishing my novel, and I am squeezing every waking moment I have into it (which still isn't as much time as I would like, or need).  So, I feel like the kid staying home on Friday night to study for finals while everyone is going to the party.  And I just know everyone will get drunk and get laid and I'm sure I'll have to hear how it was the best party ever, and they can't believe I missed it.  But, I have May 1st circled on my calendar, and I intend to finally finish the book that has taken over the last six months of my life.  So, enjoy the party everyone, and I'll be sure to make it to the next one. 

Keith

Good to hear from you, Keith.  And I'm glad you're making such progress on that novel.

Yeah - nice one Keith. You're definitely a writer to keep an eye out for. I think I'll pass this one up too, but as others have stated above - don't miss it. One of the very best intensives, and Craig is incredibly generous with the detail he puts into lectures, ideas, craft discussion and critiques.

Enjoy, you crazy workshoppers!

I hope it's working for you now Joey. Happy Birthday.

How the hell can I pass up another opportunity to study with the great Craig Clevenger?

I can't. I was in the first Hotseat, but I'm ready for another go-round. Let's rock.

The workshop whore is back!!  I'm in too!! 

 There was no way I would not do this workshop....

Looking forward seeing you all in the forums!

I've been kicking myself since last year when I missed Craig Clevenger the first time.  I can finally stop kicking.  Damn, it feels really good. 

Won't make this one.  Just not going to happen with my work schedule... Looking forward to the next one..

So do this.

If you fancy yourself a writer, even just a coffee shop poser, or someone who can actually can point to the rejection letters on the wall, do this.  Please.

I have been on a few of the intensives so far, and CC delivers far and away the best of the bunch (no offense to Max and the rest of the list.)

The hotseat is awesome, he gives you line by line edits that you would (or a publishing house that had your MS under contract) pay big bucks for.

$300 over 43 days… $6.98 a day.  What’s that, two gallons of gas?  Coffee and a pastry?  Your half of the rent?

I know most writers, especially you younger ones, cannot remember the last time you saw three C-notes, but you will walk away from this intensive secure in the knowledge that your 3 bills probably landed you the better part of an MFA when it comes to applicable writing practices.  I said it.

The man did a comparative spreadsheet to graph his adjectives per sentence ratios for crying out loud for TCH.

And he picks the right books for the librotopsy.  Postman Always Rings Twice, and Book of Revelation.  I thoroughly dug those, a nice departure from the usual intensive, but a practice echoed by many a successful author, that being read good work and break it down with your critical eye versus your “entertain me” eye.

And he doesn’t put on his happy face when it comes time to bare the red pen.  I love that.  I’d rather you tell me the truth and give me a foundation for repair than tell me its all good when in fact it is grade school book report fodder.

Let me put it another way:

An 1100 word piece I worked on for the intensive last year has since blossomed into almost 40k words, ten chapters, eleven pages of supplemental/appendix information, and is 80% done.  That was the inspiration I left with last year.  That same (original) piece has been submitted and pending approval for a number of lit mags.

So greedily, I signed up again – mainly because I need the critique, and also because the high of that intensive, unlike anything pharmacological or vinous, lasted for a long time.  I was still going on the CC high long after the Max Barry one was over.  This kind of push, this kind of structure and peer review – this will put some gas in your tank and make you daydream all day through class, burger-flipping, writing that boring column, or pushing wine on poor unsuspecting restaurants, about your characters depth, your authority push-pulls, your tense shifts, and your stakes as they relate to your overall plot.  In short, it stays in your veins for a time that far exceeds $300 worth of any other substance.

You’ll thank him later, in your acknowledgement page.

i am not sure if i am registered properly. i payed the money through the paypal account and got a reciept e-mail, but there is nothing in the orders or subscriptions section of my cult account and it had asked me to register again. i just hope that i've at least got my foot in until this gets worked out. if there is, in fact, anything to work out. help.

This is probably a dumb question but this is for novel writing right? Its not for screenplays too or anything else I assume...really wish he wrote scripts too I admire his novels so much.

 About time I stepped in for a quick hello before the starter pistol fires in a week. Some of you are coming back, which is very cool. I feel compelled to stress that the basic material is going to be largely identical to the first round from last year. Mark and I spoke at length about this, weighing the pros and cons. The point Mark stressed the most was that there were a number of folks who missed the intensive last year, in addition to the there being a sizable amount of lecture material already written. I agreed, but wanted to make certain that while the second round would be easier on yours truly- as I wouldn't be writing a new lecture every week- I didn't want to be phoning the whole thing in, either. I was tempted to compensate for this by doing at least one new book dissection (ideally two), but will keep those the same, as well. Mark and I agreed that the biggest benefit to having the material already in place was that it would allow me more time to focus on student feedback.

So, for those of you returning, you'll be familiar with the ground we're going to cover, and I hope that won't be a disappointment. I'll rewrite and expand each lesson a bit, in order to include some of the thoughts from last year's follow-up discussions. Again, my focus this year is going to be on student feedback, with the aim to go into a more detail this time around. The veterans among you should be familiar with my methods:

• I keep my finger on the board's pulse, checking in during regular intervals during my non-bartending days. I prefer to keep all of my posts public and avoid private messaging, so that everyone benefits from everyone else's questions and answers.

• For those students being strapped into the chair on a given week, I download their assignment and work from a hard copy (I've grown seriously attached to working longhand over the last couple of years; the initial draft of the current book is being written with a pen and notepad). I translate all of my edits into certain types of annotations, some standardized, others specific to the work. If I see you have a problem with over using adverbs, I'll highlight all of your adverbs blue for a couple pages; if there's a particular sentence structure or turn of phrase that repeats itself, I'll call attention to that with a specific marking so you know which passages to compare. I'll upload these in .pdf format to the boards, for you to download at your leisure.

I was relieved to find nobody objected to this method. I know lots of folks are fond of the 'track changes' feature in MSWord; while it's useful to show changes between documents, it doesn't explain why those changes were made. I know, there's the notation feature, or whatever it's called, but here's where I once again make public my hatred for MSWord. And I do mean hatred. As I said last year, 95% of its features are like the arms on a t-rex. I can import Word files just fine, but they get a bit garbled and I have to do some reformatting; the .pdf format is the easiest way to export files that anyone else can open (anyone else who doesn't share my obscure, mac-only word processor made in Israel-- Mellel, which is a little nugget of digital genius).

• My annotations are capped with my summary feedback of a student's work, and this summary is posted in the public forums, as well. This is not to give anyone a public flogging (the veterans among you know I don't do that). I'm not here to 'edit' anyone's work (although I might do so with a sample paragraph or two, as I spend more time on the pieces), but to give constructive criticism. I've spent enough time in workshops to have heard plenty of the vague, passive-aggressive input that passes for criticism. I don't want to do that, but rather get as specific as possible, showing you the mechanics of the piece and how to improve it. Again, I make this public so that everyone can learn from it.

As for screenplays... I've learned a lot from screenwriting books and will put it to use in this workshop (in fact, I've got as many citations of films as I do novels, if not more), but I don't know that I'd be of any help in giving feedback to a screenplay. I've read a few, and I still find the medium a bit elusive, to be honest. Any other introductory questions, fire away. I'll have a (slightly) revised course outline shortly after the new forum opens up.

Cheers,

[i]Craig[/i]

Thanks for all the prelim info.

This is my first one of these, so does all this just take place in one restricted-access forum? I assume there'll be something sent out with all the guidelines and technicals about when and where to go and login and whatnot?

I'm giddy like a schoolgirl. 

Looks like there is a novel by Rupert Thomson called Book of Revelations.  You must be talking about that one, and not so much wanting us to read the Bible, right?  Not that we don't need it.  Or that we won't need it after reading Book of Revelations.   *HOLY SHITE*  It looks a little ... naughty?  Is that the word I'm looking for?

Anyway, when do we need to have those books read and ready for the slice-and-dice? 

 Yeah, Mark will send out login info to the forum, once enrollment is complete and the Cult folks have the forum set up. As for the books, there's no particular time frame. Read 'em at your convenience; I'll post the dissections in due course, but won't derail the other course work.

PayPal issues solved, I'm in. Waiting in more anticipation then the anticipation i'm in waiting for the grades of my midterms I took last week. Shows my priorities i guess.  Craig, I look forward to your words and your lectures.

-Devin.

I have enrolled finally after all the paypal anti-thirdworld hassle and am thorougly kicked about this. I've never done any sort of a writing intensive before. I've been wanting to attend one ever since they started and couldn't attend the last Clevenger intensive and then I went on to hear no end of it from many people.

Though, that doesn't stop my feet from shaking and my head from wondering how will it all be. I just read Craig's note and though it does talk about how the course will move forward - I have no clue on how it will begin. But I think I should just wait for the course to begin and hit me on my head than ask questions

Here's to a great six weeks with all of you!

dev ! velvet member numero uno

I'm rather upset I JUST found out about this, but couldn't afford it anyway (wifey is with child so there is no such thing as funny money anymore!).

For those who registered, enjoy your intensive time!  It's quite a ride from one of the best!  I still have my lectures and notes ready at my side while writing (when I write, which is rare these days...must do something about that!)

I was excited to see my quote about the intensive made it in the announcement!

Holy shit, i'm actually doing this.  i'm not sure if i'm more excited or terrified.  At this point i'm really hoping that i'll be able to set aside enough time - not an easy feat. 

This is one sure way to get the kick in the ass i need to start wrting again. 

Thanks to everyone who put in their  $.02 about registering for this.

Damn, i'm pretty sure i'm terrified.

  $350, minus the early bird discount, plus a premium membership, minus the membership discount = $340

Not a bad deal, at all. Now to sell some books and beg for birthday money from everyone i know. Really, the money is the least of my worries right now.

son of a motherfucker!

i'm a passenger in a near fatal car accident and spend a night in the hospital, i get out and i go to work for the day.  i get off work and go help a friend drywall his new house and i come home and find out Craig's doing another intensive and it's ALREADY SOLD OUT!?  WHAT THE FUCK.  really, it's worth it-- and i'm glad others have the chance to experience what craig has to offer... but jesus fuck.  i'm the first endorsement listed in the advertisement!  that's me, talking about impossibly high expectations and how it was everything college wasn't--

JESUS.  i was poring over craig's essays yesterday!  i've been through mckee's STORY three times, with different color highlighters for different things!  i've read the extent of James M Cain's published work!  I have so many questions for Craig I don't feel justified even asking without paying for it; and--

Anyway.

If Craig does another intensive, after this one?  I want an advance opportunity to sign up, man.  Somebody give me a heads up.  Throw me a frickin' bone, here.

The disappointment hurts worse than the whiplash.

Wigging the fuck out in Wisconsin,

Casey

edit:

Mark (or whoever's in charge now), if anyone backs out of this, PLEASE PRETTY PRETTY PLEASE let me know; I want that seat.

The lesson here is never help your friends.

I kid. It was damn short notice, but it's easier for me to commit to something that way than a few months out, like sending a party invite too far in advance and then no one shows but everyone accepted. Hope you're feeling all right.

case.  the myspace newsletter told me first, a day (or more) before i saw it here at the cult.  you should be getting the newsletter, or at least if you have a myspace account.  being that youve taken intensives before, you get the first oppertunity to go for each new one.

so the lesson is:

myspace sucks as an average but is very necessary.  kinda like my own personal opinions on cell phones in todays day and age

we are both on the sidelines this round.  glad you have your health though.  least you made it home, right

nice to see youre still breathin'

-kabol

..

mars.  Congratulations !!

dont trip, the class is very easy.

BWAHAHAHAhahahhh

no, really.  you read the lecture, write the best you can.  edit the best you can.  put care into taking chances and write like it is the last set of words you'll ever right, your own last testament to the world that you were here.  clev will let you know his opinion on your work.  consider the criticisms and commendations, take with you what works best for you.  then, the next lecture.

just put all you heart into every lesson and assignment, you'll come out with more than you went with

oh, and have fun !!

-kabol

no.  baer. back in '05, actually.

though i certainly dont think the line is uncommon