(Un)comfortably close with Ozymandias
[IMG]http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/image.php?u=2654&dateline=1088798375[/IMG]
Brak scores (an exclusive) with [url=http://chuckpalahniuk.net/community/member.php?u=2654]Ozymandias[/url]
[B]Fullmetalbrak[/B]: For your sake, I'm glad you agreed to this interview with almost no coercion, because believe me, I was ready to coerce. I just hope you're bringing the zany.
[B]Ozymandias:[/B] Let's go!
[B]Brak:[/B] Let's warm up with the basic: What led you to the Cult?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I found it through the late Coming Attractions. They had a page for the Survivor film adaptation (pre-9/11 when it looked like it might actually happen) and it had a link to CP.net. That was 2000/2001. Sometime between Survivor coming out in paperback and Choke coming out.
[B]Brak:[/B] And now, more than a year later, you're still here. What's the appeal?
[B]Mandias:[/B] More than 3 years, sister. PRE-9/11.
[B]Brak:[/B] I'm going by your official registration date of May '04, buster.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Oh, you mean the board. I meant the general site itself.
[B]Brak:[/B] My fault for not clarifying. I meant the board.
[B]Mandias:[/B] I like it. It appeals to me. Same reasons people visit any board, I guess.
[B]Brak:[/B] What exactly about it appeals to you?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Better than average place with likable types. It's nothing that I can explain.
[B]Brak:[/B] Who are some of these "likeable types?" Who are some of your favorite Cultists?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Who AREN'T some of my favorite cultists? would be easier to answer. Um...
[B]Mandias:[/B] Actually, I was gonna do a list, but I can't think of many people besides you. I like the majority of the people here, let's just say. You, the Aussie troika, Sex on the Dot, Lazlo, Jane S., Cassun, Popcultjunkie, Random Thought, Grae, Valchrist, Brother Supremo, Prensa, Fino, Michael, lots of others I can't think of now because I don't have a list of members in front of me.
[B]Mandias:[/B] See? There's too many people to remember. This is all your fault.
[B]Brak:[/B] How is it MY fault? I am not to be blamed for your lousy memory. There seems to be a big turnover rate and not many newbies make it. Why do you think you survived, and do you have any advice for other noobs?
[B]Mandias:[/B] No. You have to be kind of a weirdo to stick around here. So if you aren't already then you're unlikely to even want to last.
[B]Brak:[/B] So that must be the secret why I'm still around. Curious.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Present company INcluded, of course.
[B]Brak:[/B] Isn't that what I just said? Bong! When the Cult's new guidelines came out, you were one of the people who vehemently opposed them. What was your gripe?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I felt that using a system of points and assigning a number of points to be taken away for each violation would suck the fun out of the place like an Emo Phillips DVD.
[B]Brak:[/B] Well now that the rep system has been tossed, do you still have a problem with anything or have you mellowed out?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It's all good, provided you don't have a vindictive admin on your back...
[B]Brak:[/B] This may be a good time to mention you just won a Cult Award for Most Likely to Start a Revolution. How do you feel about that?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It's cool, I guess. I liked being nominated better. I could bray about it more. Now that it's over there's not much to do.
[B]Brak:[/B] So there's not going to be a revolution?!
[B]Mandias:[/B] Nah. That award is essentially Most Likely To be Banned Next, methinks...
[B]Brak:[/B] Don't jinx. You were also nominated for three other awards: Most Exciting, Best Sig…and Cultist of the Year. Were you surprised?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I was very surprised. I knew a couple people were going to vote for me for the Revolution category, but the rest were quite out of left field. I know it's geeky to genuinely care about such things but it actually was flattering.
[B]Brak:[/B] That's not geeky at all...well, maybe a little. I kid! If you were emperor of the board, how would you run things?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I wouldn't. I'd let near-anarchy reign. But that's just me.
[B]Brak:[/B] Disx (bless his banned soul) once commented that you kick ass in the political forum, but can be "kinda gay" in general discussion. What do you think of that observation?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It's not untrue. There's no way to be in GD but silly unless you want to lose your mind in frustration.
[B]Brak:[/B] So true, and I've seen you post some wacky things. Why are you so politically inclined?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I'm just wired that way. Plus, there seems to be a shortage of left-wing loudmouths in the world today. So I overcompensate on the board.
[B]Brak:[/B] Do you think too many people suffer from apathy where politics, and the country in general, are concerned?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Fuck yeah. But I'm not much different. I can't watch the news or read too much of it because it's too depressing. So I can understand people taking that feeling to the extreme of just shutting it out altogether. I can't understand why so MANY people do, though.
[B]Brak:[/B] Apathy seems to have become some sort of epidemic. Is being active in the political forum your small part in trying to light a fire under people's butts to care or don't you care if they care?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I care. I'd like to think that deep down I'm trying in a VERY tiny way to influence people, but truthfully I probably just like the sound of my own echo.
[B]Brak:[/B] I rarely venture in that forum, but I think disx was right on in his assessment because you seem to be on top of current issues.
[B]Mandias:[/B] I have a bare minimum of knowledge and a lot of anger. That's all you need, I guess.
[B]Brak:[/B] You seem to have a reputation with some people here for being, quite frankly, an asshole. Are you OK with that perception?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I can deal with it. I don't think about it much. I don't thrive on it like some people like to, but it's tolerable. If I couldn't, well, I would've had to start behaving myself a LONG time ago...
[B]Brak:[/B] There's no way you can behave yourself.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Exactly. So I'd have had to stop posting a long time ago if it bothered me in any way.
[B]Brak:[/B] Do you think being an ass is the biggest misconception those fellow Cultists have about you?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I don't really think about how people view me. Hmm. I don't know. It isn't entirely a misconception either...
[B]Brak:[/B] Well I think it's the biggest misconception about you. You [I]are[/I] one surly and incorrigible fella to be sure, and those are two things I actually lurve about ya, but you also have an incredibly sweet and mirthful side (hope I'm not blowing your cover because it's not like I said I know you're also a big nerd…whoops). I'm also privy to a lot of secret-squirrel information; care to share a little tidbit other Cultists might be surprised to hear about you? If you don't, I will.
[B]Mandias:[/B] I cry after masturbating.
[B]Brak:[/B] Actually, [I]I'm[/I] a little surprised to hear that one.
[B]Mandias:[/B] I'm a delicate flower underneath it all.
[B]Brak:[/B] A sensitive buttercup. What's your favorite book by Chuck?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Invisible Monsters. HY-larious.
[B]Brak:[/B] What character of his do you most identify with?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Victor from Choke, I guess. I'm not a pussy machine (and it's a wonder, too, with suave talk like that) nor am I a scammer, but I can understand him a lot. I don't really identify with his characters so much as enjoy their company.
[B]Brak:[/B] I dispute your claim that you're not a scammer. I've noticed you often tell people not to read Diary or sympathize when they do. What's your beef with that book?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I'm just being irreverent. I mean, I DID hate it, and I would tell anyone who asked not to bother with it, but I don't despise it or anything. I'm just blowing off steam.
[B]Brak:[/B] A lot of Culties are aspiring writers. Do you do any writing of your own?
[B]Mandias:[/B] No. I suck at it. I'm not being self-deprecating or humble, I truly, TRULY suck out loud at it.
[B]Brak:[/B] I actually don't believe you. I would love to read something you wrote/ever do write. What was your favorite book as a kid?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I never read when I was a kid. I'd kick and scream and bite and cry "Rape" before anyone could get me to read. There was one book by Dean Koontz that my 4th grade teacher read to us that was the bomb diggity. About toys come to life. But that's all I remember.
([B]Brak note[/B]: After a little research, I believe this is the Koontz book that made a young Mandias finally stop crying [url=http://www.fantasticfictionimages.co.uk/images/n0/n2124.jpg] "Rape."[/url])
[B]Brak:[/B] How sad. When did you finally get it together and what's your favorite book now?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I'd read sporadically, an Orwell here, a King there, something every couple of years. But after I saw Fight Club I naturally got the book and devoured it and shortly thereafter got Ellis's American Psycho around the time that THAT movie was coming out. Then I got into both authors' catalogues and eventually moved onto other stuff and finally became (semi)literate. My favorite book is Bret Easton Ellis's Glamorama.
[B]Brak:[/B] What makes it your favorite?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It just encompasses so much about modern life and is so creative with its experiments in form. It's insane yet elegant.
[B]Brak:[/B] I originally thought you got "Ozymandias" from Shelley's poem of the same name, and I know some other people think that as well, but, in fact, it comes from…
[B]Mandias:[/B]…?
[B]Brak:[/B] That's where you fill in the blank.
[B]Mandias:[/B] No, I hate that part in interviews where someone is directed towards saying something exactly. Why don't I just do a little dance for you while I'm at it.
[B]Brak:[/B] Could you do The Robot?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I just did. Did you miss it?
[B]Brak:[/B] Yes. Damn this cyberspace separating us.
Auto response from Ozymandias1980 (1:21:19 AM): PWN3D!!1
[B]Brak:[/B] Bah! OK. Ozymandias is actually a superhero in Alan Moore's graphic novel, Watchmen, and he's the smartest and richest man in the world. Do you identify with him in any specific way or just dig him?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Just dig him. It's my favorite story ever, and he was the most interesting (if not my favorite) character. Can't recall what made me pick him, exactly, as opposed to another character. I imagine that sounded the coolest at the time. I didn't remember then that the poem was referenced in a key scene in Fight Club (book), so people tend to figure I took it from that part of the book. Just a coincidence. I've been using this handle for years and there's no need to change now.
[IMG]http://www.weirdspace.dk/Alan%20Moore/Graphics/Adrian%20Veidt.jpg[/IMG]
[I]Ozymandias, the superhero Mandias pays homage to. With his gold body stocking, I think he looks more like a Solid Gold dancer; Mandias says all superhero costumes are "ricockulous," but he can live with purple and gold.[/I]
[B]Brak:[/B] It suits you quite well, but you've been using the name for [I]years[/I]? Are you cheating on the Cult with other message boards?!
[B]Mandias:[/B] None that still exist/I'll admit to having patronized. Well one right now, but I doubt it'll last. Monogamy was fine for my grandparents...
[B]Mandias:[/B] Actually it wasn't because my grandmother was a horrific shrew who broke my grandfather, but you get the idea I was trying to convey.
[B]Brak:[/B] Haha. You're not going to reveal your mistress' name?
[B]Mandias:[/B] No. No need for a catfight over me. I get enough of those at church.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Gadamn, that was lame. ([B]Brak note:[/B] He inserted an embarrassed icon here.)
[B]Brak:[/B] I concur. You're also an admirer of Herr Starr from the Preacher series. Have you ever had your left ear burned off during an orgy?
[B]Mandias:[/B] No. But it'd be worth it to get to spout stuff like, "You love me? I see. Tell me, could you see yourself kneeling behind me, thrusting a sawfish in my rectum and shouting 'Who's the Man! Who's the Man!'? Because that's the only way I can achieve even a glimmer of sexual satisfaction. Well, could you?"
[B]Mandias:[/B] Shit, you made me go and geek out. Trickster.
[B]Brak:[/B] Ha. But what a quote! And yes...I could.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Nothing fazes me about you anymore since I heard about the Carrot Top tattoo.
[B]Brak:[/B] Lies! Herr Starr is also fond of telling people to stick their head in the toilet, so speaking of swirlies, do you think they're cruel or good, harmless fun?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Horrific cruelty. If anyone had done that to me I'd have gone papal.
[B]Brak:[/B] What if they flushed the toilet first?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Well, I'd assumed that. Great, new visual. Thanx a pantload.
[B]Brak:[/B] You betcha. I know you really enjoy movies and are knowledgeable in that area, too, so if given an unlimited budget and time, is there any film you would want to remake, either because you didn't like the ending or some other aspect of it?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Psycho. Just to piss off everybody all over again. Naw. I'm not an artist but it'd be too depressing to go over someone else's tracks.
[B]Brak:[/B] Then is there any film you wish you had written and/or directed?
[B]Mandias:[/B] The Lord of the Rings series. No special reason, just seems like the experience of a lifetime.
[B]Brak:[/B] What's your favorite movie?
[B]Mandias:[/B] The Seven Samurai. Whenever I watch it I hold my lighter in the air during the last battle like a mongoloid.
[B]Brak:[/B] Well, that's certainly a film worth acting like a Bic-flickin' mongoloid over.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Well, that and King Ralph...
[B]Brak:[/B] King Ralph. Ha! Whose ass would you love to kick?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Sean Hannity. I'd never get tired of wailing on that horrific smug face in a million years.
[B]Brak:[/B] Who's that?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Faux News talking-head/GOP lap-dog. To know him is to hate him.
([url=http://www.wfbl.com/seanhannity.jpg]This is the guy[/url] who better not ever meet Mandias in a dark alley, or even broad daylight for that matter.)
[B]Brak:[/B] Are you ticklish?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Extremely. I shouldn't have told you that though.
[B]Brak:[/B] Hehe. Too late. Do you blush easily?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I don't know. I don't have the money to pay someone to follow me around with a large mirror. But in a just world I would. I shouldn't have told you that though.
[B]Brak:[/B] Again, too late. Share something kooky you did as a kid.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Mooned a teacher in the school parking lot.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Wait, define "kid."
[B]Brak:[/B] As in something you didn't just do last week. Like when you were much younger.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Well I was much younger then. Does 11 count or did you want something older?
[B]Brak:[/B] 11 is groovy. Did the teacher go blind?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Not that I know of. I avoided him like the plague after that, natch. He wouldn't acknowledge my existence when I tried to say Hello months later.
[B]Brak:[/B] Can't say I really blame the guy. I was kind of hoping you would have told that one cute and weird story about the "sandwich," but this is a good one, too.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Sandwich?
[B]Brak:[/B] Catnip ring a bell?
[B]Mandias:[/B] That was a whack story, all I did was make a catnip sandwich and microwave the fucker. No zany outcome.
[B]Brak:[/B] I thought it was cute, although it would have been good if you would have at least gotten a little buzz or felt the urge to chase a ball of yarn.
[B]Mandias:[/B] I didn't eat it!
[B]Brak:[/B] I thought you ate it. Bummer. What was your favorite Halloween costume?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Favorite costume? Kermit from Muppet Babies (shut the FUCK up). It wasn't groundbreaking, but it made me happiest and wasn't the same pirate/hobo shit I/everyone always did in later years.
[B]Brak:[/B] Ohhhhhh. That’s endearing. What would your dream job be?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Author. That, of course, would be dependent on me suddenly waking up one day and having an ounce of talent, but you did say DREAM job, no? It'd fit me just right. No schedule or boss or human interaction needed, just pull out a notebook and write away wherever/whenever the urge hit me. Could go anywhere whenever I pleased. I'd be happy just making a living that way, wouldn't even need to be successful like a Stephen King or even a Chuck.
[B]Brak:[/B] So I guess you don't really have any aspirations to reach that goal of becoming an author, other than wishful thinking?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Right. I'm busy slacking.
[B]Brak:[/B] Perhaps that should be your dream job. You'd make a mint at being a slackass. If you could get away with it, what three things in the world would you steal?
[B]Mandias:[/B] The world's arms supply. Not so much for peacenik reasons, but rather curiosity to see what would happen if people had to rely on their brains again. So, on the same token I'd steal every TV in America. And 10 billion dollars, natch.
[B]Brak:[/B] Natch. But what would you do with that much money?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Buy a decent house w/swimming pool and buy a nice car. Give 9 billion to charity (not charity GROUPS, because so much of that money is lost, but to individual charity cases) keep the rest and slack in comfort.
[B]Brak:[/B] Would you pull a Grampa Simpson and make people come to you and plead their case for your cash?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Damn, you're good. I was going to say that, but felt like I'd dropped enough masturbatory Simpsons’ references lately. Yeah, I would.
[B]Brak:[/B] By the way, in case you're wondering, I haven't asked you your name/age/occupation yet because I already know them, and even if I didn't, I wouldn't ask because I never have a pressing need to know those kinds of details about people at the board. However, many other people are interested in such things, so if you want to spill this information, have at it. If not, say, "Next question."
[B]Mandias:[/B] Good call. I have to avoid chatrooms for life because of the endless "a/s/l"s.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Next!
[B]Brak:[/B] Describe yourself in five words.
[B]Mandias:[/B] No x 5.
[B]Brak:[/B] Wha? That's a copout! I can easily come up with 5. OK, then. Do you have any hidden talents?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Not a one. Maddening to think, no?
[B]Brak:[/B] You mean you really can't juggle rubber chickens while doing the Groucho dance? Why must you lie? Or are you just being modest?
[B]Mandias:[/B] The 4th option.
[B]Brak:[/B] What's the 4th option?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Don't make me repeat myself.
[B]Mandias:[/B] This interview is careening downhill, headed for a cliff...
[B]Brak:[/B] Yeah, it's like I'm riding shotgun with Toonces. Given the chance, is there anything about your life you would do over?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Oh yes. I'd have done better in school and pursued higher education and taken care of my body. I'm a cornucopia of regret.
[B]Brak:[/B] There's still time to make amends, though, ya know. Are there things you regret you've actually done?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Oh yes. I'll save those for when the tape recorder is shut off, though.
[B]Brak:[/B] Oooo...sounds juicy. Can't wait to hear the gory details. What qualities do you admire in yourself?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I still believe in goodness even if I don't practice it. Um…yeah, that's about it.
[B]Brak:[/B] What do you feel the most grateful for in your life?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I was born white and male in the richest country in the world. Hit the reincarnation lotto, so to speak.
[B]Brak:[/B] If you could only listen to one musician or group for the rest of your life, who would it be?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Dylan. He's done so much different shit and it's all worked (from what I've heard at least) that I think there's a good chance I wouldn't tire of it.
[B]Brak:[/B] I had a feeling he would be it. What's your favorite Dylan song?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It changes. For a while it's been I Don't Believe You (She Acts Like We've Never Met).
[B]Brak:[/B] Hmmm. I'm not familiar with that one. Do you relate to the lyrics personally or just like the melody or what?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It's just a bitchin’ song. But I'm thinking of a live version where he gets booed by his own audience. That adds something to it.
[B]Brak:[/B] It most certainly does add a nice touch. Do you really want more black dildos in your Christmas stocking this year?
[B]Brak:[/B] Oh yeah...MORE?!
[B]Mandias:[/B] And if I do?
[B]Brak:[/B] Then my present dilemma is solved.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Grrrrrr.
[B]Brak:[/B] Oooo...tiger! Are you influenced by anything or anyone?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I'm influenced by everything. It all affects me.
[B]Brak:[/B] Are you ruled more by your head or your heart?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I try to strike a balance, but probably my heart. I'm a softy.
[B]Brak:[/B] What touches you? And I mean emotionally, not in your special naughty place.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Sincerity.
[B]Brak:[/B] When is the last time you cried?
[B]Mandias:[/B] The Elephant Man. Rented it over a year ago. Cried at the end like the world had just blown up. *pussy*
[B]Brak:[/B] Awww.
[B]Brak:[/B] Vices. Spill 'em.
[B]Mandias:[/B] I smoke and lie and steal occasionally. Aside from that I'm like the Pope. Sans the pederasty.
[B]Brak:[/B] What are some of your indulgences…monetarily and/or time wise?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Music, DVDs, books, Internet. That's about it. Sad, no?
[B]Brak:[/B] No. Being from Massachusetts, do you get bent when people call it chowDER instead of chowDAH?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It's chowda! I'll kill you! I'll kill all of you! Especially those of you in the jury!!!
[B]Brak:[/B] Another wankin' reference to The Simpsons! Who did you think was the cutest Spice Girl?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Ginger. Well, not cute so much, but she had/has great tits.
[B]Brak:[/B] Typical. What's your favorite creature of the night?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Werewolf, mostly because it's never been done *just* right.
[B]Brak:[/B] How would you do it *just* right?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Have the person have more control over themselves when they're a wolf, and, by contrast, have them still be kinda wolfish between full moons. Ginger Snaps delivered on the latter idea, at least.
[B]Brak:[/B] Would you ever want to be a werewolf?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Sure. It'd be an experience.
[B]Brak:[/B] Oh, crap. I just knocked a candle off my computer and it shattered and I was cleaning up the glass and split my finger open. BRB!
[B]Mandias:[/B] My poor darling baby *kisses finger*
[B]Some time elapses…[/B]
[B]Brak:[/B] I am sooooooo tempted to leave this part in! Ha. Thank you, sweetness. It's not that bad a cut...at least nothing two WWF "Slam Care Bandages" (of The Undertaker and Mankind) can't take care of.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Do it!
[B]Brak:[/B] I will!
[B]Mandias:[/B] Appropriate, they had some bloody matches...
[B]Brak:[/B] Speaking of blood, so you could kill people if you were a werewolf?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Well, that'd be my dilemma. But I wouldn't be as virtuous as most victims of lycanthropia.
[B]Brak:[/B] Maybe you should practice howling during the next full moon...you know, just in case.
[B]Mandias:[/B] How about no?
[B]Brak:[/B] I remember a conversation we had ages ago where we talked about midgets and you bemoaned the fact bleeding hearts would be against having them as house pets. Would you really want a midget for a pet?
[B]Mandias:[/B] No, not REALLY, they just amuse and frighten me at the same time.
[B]Brak:[/B] They have that affect on a lot of people. Is there anything you would like to add about yourself, the Cult or in general?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Not a thing.
[B]Brak:[/B] Last question, then: Mr. T has faced some formidable opponents in his day…Boba Fett, Megatron, his own abstract thoughts…and has defeated them all. [IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v101/fiberopticjesus/Mr_T.gif[/IMG]Mr. T vs. Brock's ego: who's going down in [I]that[/I] match up?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Hehe. Brock's ego. It wouldn't be able to withstand Tha T's pity, let alone T himself.
[B]Brak:[/B] Haha. I do believe you're right, but it would be a close one.
[B]Brak:[/B] Looks like you're out of the hot seat now, Mandias.
[B]Mandias:[/B] You give good interview.
[B]Brak:[/B] Thanks a pantload.
A Vendetta production. <3
[IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v651/Vendetta_M/batboy.jpg[/IMG]
[SIZE=1]Sitting like a princess perched in her electric chair[/SIZE]
brak: you stealed my style.
ozy: I HATE SEAN HANNITY TOO! and Cal Thomas, and that dude with the fucked up yellow hair, and Ann Coulter, and and and.... they're 4 of the top 5 people on my Will-Openly-Celebrate-in-the-Streets-When-They-Die list.
[QUOTE=fullmetalbrak][IMG]http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/image.php?u=2654&dateline=1088798375[/IMG]
Brak scores (an exclusive) with [url=http://chuckpalahniuk.net/community/member.php?u=2654]Ozymandias[/url]
[. . .]
[B]Brak:[/B] Who are some of these "likeable types?" Who are some of your favorite Cultists?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Who AREN'T some of my favorite cultists? would be easier to answer. Um...
[B]Mandias:[/B] Actually, I was gonna do a list, but I can't think of many people besides you. I like the majority of the people here, let's just say. You, the Aussie troika, Sex on the Dot, Lazlo, Jane S., Cassun, Popcultjunkie, Random Thought, Grae, Valchrist, Brother Supremo, Prensa, Fino, Michael, lots of others I can't think of now because I don't have a list of members in front of me.
[B]Mandias:[/B] See? There's too many people to remember. This is all your fault.
[/QUOTE]
ahh..you had me at hello.. 
[QUOTE=alex cassun]brak: you stealed my style.[/QUOTE]
Back it up, bud. I had this done before you even posted your interview with Laz...that's why my eyes popped out when I saw your format. But hey, I'm going to take this as a compliment that we're both good. Ha.
And thanks, owen. 
A Vendetta production. <3
[IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v651/Vendetta_M/batboy.jpg[/IMG]
[SIZE=1]Sitting like a princess perched in her electric chair[/SIZE]
Good job Miss Brak.
cool interview
BUT THEY ARE LITTLE PEOPLE NOT MIDGETS! AND they have rights too! When I was working at the IRS I asked! And I was told that two little people do not make one whole person, that if a little person has a ssn then they are a whole person as far as the IRS is concerned, so, down with your tyranny of trying to make them pets.
i suspected that ozy was secretly huggable...
Awww. But only when his pants are on, right? Ha.
[QUOTE=Mr. Brown]Good job Miss Brak.[/QUOTE]
Let's hope you feel this way I when [I]your[/I] interview comes out, Brown. 
[QUOTE=Peon of Grand Ambitions]BUT THEY ARE LITTLE PEOPLE NOT MIDGETS! AND they have rights too! When I was working at the IRS I asked! And I was told that two little people do not make one whole person, that if a little person has a ssn then they are a whole person as far as the IRS is concerned, so, down with your tyranny of trying to make them pets.[/QUOTE]
Hey now. I seem to recall in your newbie thread you said your ambition was to be king of the little people. Tell me [I]that's[/I] not tyranny. Besides, he said he doesn't want a midget, er little person, as a house pet, so all is cool in Lilliput.
A Vendetta production. <3
[IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v651/Vendetta_M/batboy.jpg[/IMG]
[SIZE=1]Sitting like a princess perched in her electric chair[/SIZE]
yea, i should always check before hugging someone whether they are wearing pants
[QUOTE]Let's hope you feel this way I when your interview comes out, Brown. [/QUOTE]
Let's hope I don't sue.
*off to watch a film*
well that certainly brought the zany. i heart both of you.
[QUOTE=glamhoth]i suspected that ozy was secretly huggable...[/QUOTE]
same! it is now confirmed!
life's pretty straight without vidalia :You_Rock_
[QUOTE=alex cassun]brak: you stealed my style.[/QUOTE]
You stole mine. 
[IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v298/Lazlosdead/completeLazloSig.jpg[/IMG]
.JPE "owenwarland's picture")
You guys can have this style. Y'all can't compare to my style anyway.
there is no emoticon for what i am feeling.
[QUOTE=big S]there is no emoticon for what i am feeling.[/QUOTE]
Huh?
[QUOTE=owenwarland]Huh?[/QUOTE]
i was noting the slightly excessive use of emoticons in this thread. and quoting the simpsons.
[QUOTE=big S]i was noting the slightly excessive use of emoticons in this thread. and quoting the simpsons.[/QUOTE]
:confused: Eat my shorts, man.
:mad: damn you, walt whitman!
[QUOTE=fullmetalbrak]
Hey now. I seem to recall in your newbie thread you said your ambition was to be king of the little people. Tell me [I]that's[/I] not tyranny. Besides, he said he doesn't want a midget, er little person, as a house pet, so all is cool in Lilliput. ;)[/QUOTE]
I want to be their king to help them, to empower them, to bring them to their full potential and help them to rule the world as is their proper place! He wants to put a pom pom on their head and have them run under his bed to dust it! Me == Good Tyranny! Him == Bad, Evildoer in cohoots with the Axis of Evil! I am moving to Lilliput since I can't find any Little People in my area.
[QUOTE=Peon of Grand Ambitions]BUT THEY ARE LITTLE PEOPLE NOT MIDGETS![/QUOTE]
I'll meet you halfway and call them "sausage-fingers".
It's not easy having a good time.
Even smiling makes my face ache.
You are a true gentleman for being able to compromise. Sausage-fingers it is.
[QUOTE=fullmetalbrak]([B]Brak note[/B]: After a little research, I believe this is the Koontz book that made a young Mandias finally stop crying [url=http://www.fantasticfictionimages.co.uk/images/n0/n2124.jpg] "Rape."[/url])[/QUOTE]
[URL=http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/044651490X/qid=1094171638/sr=ka-1/ref=pd_ka_1/002-1882825-5984012]You're fired.[/URL]
It's not easy having a good time.
Even smiling makes my face ache.
Aw, fucknuts.
A Vendetta production. <3
[IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v651/Vendetta_M/batboy.jpg[/IMG]
[SIZE=1]Sitting like a princess perched in her electric chair[/SIZE]
[QUOTE=fullmetalbrak][IMG]http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/image.php?u=2654&dateline=1088798375[/IMG]
Brak scores (an exclusive) with [url=http://chuckpalahniuk.net/community/member.php?u=2654]Ozymandias[/url]
[B]Fullmetalbrak[/B]: For your sake, I'm glad you agreed to this interview with almost no coercion, because believe me, I was ready to coerce. I just hope you're bringing the zany.
[B]Ozymandias:[/B] Let's go!
[B]Brak:[/B] Let's warm up with the basic: What led you to the Cult?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I found it through the late Coming Attractions. They had a page for the Survivor film adaptation (pre-9/11 when it looked like it might actually happen) and it had a link to CP.net. That was 2000/2001. Sometime between Survivor coming out in paperback and Choke coming out.
[B]Brak:[/B] And now, more than a year later, you're still here. What's the appeal?
[B]Mandias:[/B] More than 3 years, sister. PRE-9/11.
[B]Brak:[/B] I'm going by your official registration date of May '04, buster.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Oh, you mean the board. I meant the general site itself.
[B]Brak:[/B] My fault for not clarifying. I meant the board.
[B]Mandias:[/B] I like it. It appeals to me. Same reasons people visit any board, I guess.
[B]Brak:[/B] What exactly about it appeals to you?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Better than average place with likable types. It's nothing that I can explain.
[B]Brak:[/B] Who are some of these "likeable types?" Who are some of your favorite Cultists?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Who AREN'T some of my favorite cultists? would be easier to answer. Um...
[B]Mandias:[/B] Actually, I was gonna do a list, but I can't think of many people besides you. I like the majority of the people here, let's just say. You, the Aussie troika, Sex on the Dot, Lazlo, Jane S., Cassun, Popcultjunkie, Random Thought, Grae, Valchrist, Brother Supremo, Prensa, Fino, Michael, lots of others I can't think of now because I don't have a list of members in front of me.
[B]Mandias:[/B] See? There's too many people to remember. This is all your fault.
[B]Brak:[/B] How is it MY fault? I am not to be blamed for your lousy memory. There seems to be a big turnover rate and not many newbies make it. Why do you think you survived, and do you have any advice for other noobs?
[B]Mandias:[/B] No. You have to be kind of a weirdo to stick around here. So if you aren't already then you're unlikely to even want to last.
[B]Brak:[/B] So that must be the secret why I'm still around. Curious.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Present company INcluded, of course.
[B]Brak:[/B] Isn't that what I just said? Bong! When the Cult's new guidelines came out, you were one of the people who vehemently opposed them. What was your gripe?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I felt that using a system of points and assigning a number of points to be taken away for each violation would suck the fun out of the place like an Emo Phillips DVD.
[B]Brak:[/B] Well now that the rep system has been tossed, do you still have a problem with anything or have you mellowed out?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It's all good, provided you don't have a vindictive admin on your back...
[B]Brak:[/B] This may be a good time to mention you just won a Cult Award for Most Likely to Start a Revolution. How do you feel about that?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It's cool, I guess. I liked being nominated better. I could bray about it more. Now that it's over there's not much to do.
[B]Brak:[/B] So there's not going to be a revolution?!
[B]Mandias:[/B] Nah. That award is essentially Most Likely To be Banned Next, methinks...
[B]Brak:[/B] Don't jinx. You were also nominated for three other awards: Most Exciting, Best Sig…and Cultist of the Year. Were you surprised?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I was very surprised. I knew a couple people were going to vote for me for the Revolution category, but the rest were quite out of left field. I know it's geeky to genuinely care about such things but it actually was flattering.
[B]Brak:[/B] That's not geeky at all...well, maybe a little. I kid! If you were emperor of the board, how would you run things?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I wouldn't. I'd let near-anarchy reign. But that's just me.
[B]Brak:[/B] Disx (bless his banned soul) once commented that you kick ass in the political forum, but can be "kinda gay" in general discussion. What do you think of that observation?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It's not untrue. There's no way to be in GD but silly unless you want to lose your mind in frustration.
[B]Brak:[/B] So true, and I've seen you post some wacky things. Why are you so politically inclined?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I'm just wired that way. Plus, there seems to be a shortage of left-wing loudmouths in the world today. So I overcompensate on the board.
[B]Brak:[/B] Do you think too many people suffer from apathy where politics, and the country in general, are concerned?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Fuck yeah. But I'm not much different. I can't watch the news or read too much of it because it's too depressing. So I can understand people taking that feeling to the extreme of just shutting it out altogether. I can't understand why so MANY people do, though.
[B]Brak:[/B] Apathy seems to have become some sort of epidemic. Is being active in the political forum your small part in trying to light a fire under people's butts to care or don't you care if they care?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I care. I'd like to think that deep down I'm trying in a VERY tiny way to influence people, but truthfully I probably just like the sound of my own echo.
[B]Brak:[/B] I rarely venture in that forum, but I think disx was right on in his assessment because you seem to be on top of current issues.
[B]Mandias:[/B] I have a bare minimum of knowledge and a lot of anger. That's all you need, I guess.
[B]Brak:[/B] You seem to have a reputation with some people here for being, quite frankly, an asshole. Are you OK with that perception?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I can deal with it. I don't think about it much. I don't thrive on it like some people like to, but it's tolerable. If I couldn't, well, I would've had to start behaving myself a LONG time ago...
[B]Brak:[/B] There's no way you can behave yourself.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Exactly. So I'd have had to stop posting a long time ago if it bothered me in any way.
[B]Brak:[/B] Do you think being an ass is the biggest misconception those fellow Cultists have about you?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I don't really think about how people view me. Hmm. I don't know. It isn't entirely a misconception either...
[B]Brak:[/B] Well I think it's the biggest misconception about you. You [I]are[/I] one surly and incorrigible fella to be sure, and those are two things I actually lurve about ya, but you also have an incredibly sweet and mirthful side (hope I'm not blowing your cover because it's not like I said I know you're also a big nerd…whoops). I'm also privy to a lot of secret-squirrel information; care to share a little tidbit other Cultists might be surprised to hear about you? If you don't, I will.
[B]Mandias:[/B] I cry after masturbating.
[B]Brak:[/B] Actually, [I]I'm[/I] a little surprised to hear that one.
[B]Mandias:[/B] I'm a delicate flower underneath it all.
[B]Brak:[/B] A sensitive buttercup. What's your favorite book by Chuck?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Invisible Monsters. HY-larious.
[B]Brak:[/B] What character of his do you most identify with?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Victor from Choke, I guess. I'm not a pussy machine (and it's a wonder, too, with suave talk like that) nor am I a scammer, but I can understand him a lot. I don't really identify with his characters so much as enjoy their company.
[B]Brak:[/B] I dispute your claim that you're not a scammer. I've noticed you often tell people not to read Diary or sympathize when they do. What's your beef with that book?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I'm just being irreverent. I mean, I DID hate it, and I would tell anyone who asked not to bother with it, but I don't despise it or anything. I'm just blowing off steam.
[B]Brak:[/B] A lot of Culties are aspiring writers. Do you do any writing of your own?
[B]Mandias:[/B] No. I suck at it. I'm not being self-deprecating or humble, I truly, TRULY suck out loud at it.
[B]Brak:[/B] I actually don't believe you. I would love to read something you wrote/ever do write. What was your favorite book as a kid?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I never read when I was a kid. I'd kick and scream and bite and cry "Rape" before anyone could get me to read. There was one book by Dean Koontz that my 4th grade teacher read to us that was the bomb diggity. About toys come to life. But that's all I remember.
([B]Brak note[/B]: After a little research, I believe this is the Koontz book that made a young Mandias finally stop crying [url=http://www.fantasticfictionimages.co.uk/images/n0/n2124.jpg] "Rape."[/url])
[B]Brak:[/B] How sad. When did you finally get it together and what's your favorite book now?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I'd read sporadically, an Orwell here, a King there, something every couple of years. But after I saw Fight Club I naturally got the book and devoured it and shortly thereafter got Ellis's American Psycho around the time that THAT movie was coming out. Then I got into both authors' catalogues and eventually moved onto other stuff and finally became (semi)literate. My favorite book is Bret Easton Ellis's Glamorama.
[B]Brak:[/B] What makes it your favorite?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It just encompasses so much about modern life and is so creative with its experiments in form. It's insane yet elegant.
[B]Brak:[/B] I originally thought you got "Ozymandias" from Shelley's poem of the same name, and I know some other people think that as well, but, in fact, it comes from…
[B]Mandias:[/B]…?
[B]Brak:[/B] That's where you fill in the blank.
[B]Mandias:[/B] No, I hate that part in interviews where someone is directed towards saying something exactly. Why don't I just do a little dance for you while I'm at it.
[B]Brak:[/B] Could you do The Robot?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I just did. Did you miss it?
[B]Brak:[/B] Yes. Damn this cyberspace separating us.
Auto response from Ozymandias1980 (1:21:19 AM): PWN3D!!1
[B]Brak:[/B] Bah! OK. Ozymandias is actually a superhero in Alan Moore's graphic novel, Watchmen, and he's the smartest and richest man in the world. Do you identify with him in any specific way or just dig him?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Just dig him. It's my favorite story ever, and he was the most interesting (if not my favorite) character. Can't recall what made me pick him, exactly, as opposed to another character. I imagine that sounded the coolest at the time. I didn't remember then that the poem was referenced in a key scene in Fight Club (book), so people tend to figure I took it from that part of the book. Just a coincidence. I've been using this handle for years and there's no need to change now.
[IMG]http://www.weirdspace.dk/Alan%20Moore/Graphics/Adrian%20Veidt.jpg[/IMG]
[I]Ozymandias, the superhero Mandias pays homage to. With his gold body stocking, I think he looks more like a Solid Gold dancer; Mandias says all superhero costumes are "ricockulous," but he can live with purple and gold.[/I]
[B]Brak:[/B] It suits you quite well, but you've been using the name for [I]years[/I]? Are you cheating on the Cult with other message boards?!
[B]Mandias:[/B] None that still exist/I'll admit to having patronized. Well one right now, but I doubt it'll last. Monogamy was fine for my grandparents...
[B]Mandias:[/B] Actually it wasn't because my grandmother was a horrific shrew who broke my grandfather, but you get the idea I was trying to convey.
[B]Brak:[/B] Haha. You're not going to reveal your mistress' name?
[B]Mandias:[/B] No. No need for a catfight over me. I get enough of those at church.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Gadamn, that was lame. ([B]Brak note:[/B] He inserted an embarrassed icon here.)
[B]Brak:[/B] I concur. You're also an admirer of Herr Starr from the Preacher series. Have you ever had your left ear burned off during an orgy?
[B]Mandias:[/B] No. But it'd be worth it to get to spout stuff like, "You love me? I see. Tell me, could you see yourself kneeling behind me, thrusting a sawfish in my rectum and shouting 'Who's the Man! Who's the Man!'? Because that's the only way I can achieve even a glimmer of sexual satisfaction. Well, could you?"
[B]Mandias:[/B] Shit, you made me go and geek out. Trickster.
[B]Brak:[/B] Ha. But what a quote! And yes...I could.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Nothing fazes me about you anymore since I heard about the Carrot Top tattoo.
[B]Brak:[/B] Lies! Herr Starr is also fond of telling people to stick their head in the toilet, so speaking of swirlies, do you think they're cruel or good, harmless fun?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Horrific cruelty. If anyone had done that to me I'd have gone papal.
[B]Brak:[/B] What if they flushed the toilet first?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Well, I'd assumed that. Great, new visual. Thanx a pantload.
[B]Brak:[/B] You betcha. I know you really enjoy movies and are knowledgeable in that area, too, so if given an unlimited budget and time, is there any film you would want to remake, either because you didn't like the ending or some other aspect of it?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Psycho. Just to piss off everybody all over again. Naw. I'm not an artist but it'd be too depressing to go over someone else's tracks.
[B]Brak:[/B] Then is there any film you wish you had written and/or directed?
[B]Mandias:[/B] The Lord of the Rings series. No special reason, just seems like the experience of a lifetime.
[B]Brak:[/B] What's your favorite movie?
[B]Mandias:[/B] The Seven Samurai. Whenever I watch it I hold my lighter in the air during the last battle like a mongoloid.
[B]Brak:[/B] Well, that's certainly a film worth acting like a Bic-flickin' mongoloid over.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Well, that and King Ralph...
[B]Brak:[/B] King Ralph. Ha! Whose ass would you love to kick?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Sean Hannity. I'd never get tired of wailing on that horrific smug face in a million years.
[B]Brak:[/B] Who's that?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Faux News talking-head/GOP lap-dog. To know him is to hate him.
([url=http://www.wfbl.com/seanhannity.jpg]This is the guy[/url] who better not ever meet Mandias in a dark alley, or even broad daylight for that matter.)
[B]Brak:[/B] Are you ticklish?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Extremely. I shouldn't have told you that though.
[B]Brak:[/B] Hehe. Too late. Do you blush easily?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I don't know. I don't have the money to pay someone to follow me around with a large mirror. But in a just world I would. I shouldn't have told you that though.
[B]Brak:[/B] Again, too late. Share something kooky you did as a kid.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Mooned a teacher in the school parking lot.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Wait, define "kid."
[B]Brak:[/B] As in something you didn't just do last week. Like when you were much younger.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Well I was much younger then. Does 11 count or did you want something older?
[B]Brak:[/B] 11 is groovy. Did the teacher go blind?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Not that I know of. I avoided him like the plague after that, natch. He wouldn't acknowledge my existence when I tried to say Hello months later.
[B]Brak:[/B] Can't say I really blame the guy. I was kind of hoping you would have told that one cute and weird story about the "sandwich," but this is a good one, too.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Sandwich?
[B]Brak:[/B] Catnip ring a bell?
[B]Mandias:[/B] That was a whack story, all I did was make a catnip sandwich and microwave the fucker. No zany outcome.
[B]Brak:[/B] I thought it was cute, although it would have been good if you would have at least gotten a little buzz or felt the urge to chase a ball of yarn.
[B]Mandias:[/B] I didn't eat it!
[B]Brak:[/B] I thought you ate it. Bummer. What was your favorite Halloween costume?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Favorite costume? Kermit from Muppet Babies (shut the FUCK up). It wasn't groundbreaking, but it made me happiest and wasn't the same pirate/hobo shit I/everyone always did in later years.
[B]Brak:[/B] Ohhhhhh. That’s endearing. What would your dream job be?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Author. That, of course, would be dependent on me suddenly waking up one day and having an ounce of talent, but you did say DREAM job, no? It'd fit me just right. No schedule or boss or human interaction needed, just pull out a notebook and write away wherever/whenever the urge hit me. Could go anywhere whenever I pleased. I'd be happy just making a living that way, wouldn't even need to be successful like a Stephen King or even a Chuck.
[B]Brak:[/B] So I guess you don't really have any aspirations to reach that goal of becoming an author, other than wishful thinking?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Right. I'm busy slacking.
[B]Brak:[/B] Perhaps that should be your dream job. You'd make a mint at being a slackass. If you could get away with it, what three things in the world would you steal?
[B]Mandias:[/B] The world's arms supply. Not so much for peacenik reasons, but rather curiosity to see what would happen if people had to rely on their brains again. So, on the same token I'd steal every TV in America. And 10 billion dollars, natch.
[B]Brak:[/B] Natch. But what would you do with that much money?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Buy a decent house w/swimming pool and buy a nice car. Give 9 billion to charity (not charity GROUPS, because so much of that money is lost, but to individual charity cases) keep the rest and slack in comfort.
[B]Brak:[/B] Would you pull a Grampa Simpson and make people come to you and plead their case for your cash?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Damn, you're good. I was going to say that, but felt like I'd dropped enough masturbatory Simpsons’ references lately. Yeah, I would.
[B]Brak:[/B] By the way, in case you're wondering, I haven't asked you your name/age/occupation yet because I already know them, and even if I didn't, I wouldn't ask because I never have a pressing need to know those kinds of details about people at the board. However, many other people are interested in such things, so if you want to spill this information, have at it. If not, say, "Next question."
[B]Mandias:[/B] Good call. I have to avoid chatrooms for life because of the endless "a/s/l"s.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Next!
[B]Brak:[/B] Describe yourself in five words.
[B]Mandias:[/B] No x 5.
[B]Brak:[/B] Wha? That's a copout! I can easily come up with 5. OK, then. Do you have any hidden talents?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Not a one. Maddening to think, no?
[B]Brak:[/B] You mean you really can't juggle rubber chickens while doing the Groucho dance? Why must you lie? Or are you just being modest?
[B]Mandias:[/B] The 4th option.
[B]Brak:[/B] What's the 4th option?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Don't make me repeat myself.
[B]Mandias:[/B] This interview is careening downhill, headed for a cliff...
[B]Brak:[/B] Yeah, it's like I'm riding shotgun with Toonces. Given the chance, is there anything about your life you would do over?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Oh yes. I'd have done better in school and pursued higher education and taken care of my body. I'm a cornucopia of regret.
[B]Brak:[/B] There's still time to make amends, though, ya know. Are there things you regret you've actually done?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Oh yes. I'll save those for when the tape recorder is shut off, though.
[B]Brak:[/B] Oooo...sounds juicy. Can't wait to hear the gory details. What qualities do you admire in yourself?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I still believe in goodness even if I don't practice it. Um…yeah, that's about it.
[B]Brak:[/B] What do you feel the most grateful for in your life?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I was born white and male in the richest country in the world. Hit the reincarnation lotto, so to speak.
[B]Brak:[/B] If you could only listen to one musician or group for the rest of your life, who would it be?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Dylan. He's done so much different shit and it's all worked (from what I've heard at least) that I think there's a good chance I wouldn't tire of it.
[B]Brak:[/B] I had a feeling he would be it. What's your favorite Dylan song?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It changes. For a while it's been I Don't Believe You (She Acts Like We've Never Met).
[B]Brak:[/B] Hmmm. I'm not familiar with that one. Do you relate to the lyrics personally or just like the melody or what?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It's just a bitchin’ song. But I'm thinking of a live version where he gets booed by his own audience. That adds something to it.
[B]Brak:[/B] It most certainly does add a nice touch. Do you really want more black dildos in your Christmas stocking this year?
[B]Brak:[/B] Oh yeah...MORE?!
[B]Mandias:[/B] And if I do?
[B]Brak:[/B] Then my present dilemma is solved.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Grrrrrr.
[B]Brak:[/B] Oooo...tiger! Are you influenced by anything or anyone?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I'm influenced by everything. It all affects me.
[B]Brak:[/B] Are you ruled more by your head or your heart?
[B]Mandias:[/B] I try to strike a balance, but probably my heart. I'm a softy.
[B]Brak:[/B] What touches you? And I mean emotionally, not in your special naughty place.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Sincerity.
[B]Brak:[/B] When is the last time you cried?
[B]Mandias:[/B] The Elephant Man. Rented it over a year ago. Cried at the end like the world had just blown up. *pussy*
[B]Brak:[/B] Awww.
[B]Brak:[/B] Vices. Spill 'em.
[B]Mandias:[/B] I smoke and lie and steal occasionally. Aside from that I'm like the Pope. Sans the pederasty.
[B]Brak:[/B] What are some of your indulgences…monetarily and/or time wise?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Music, DVDs, books, Internet. That's about it. Sad, no?
[B]Brak:[/B] No. Being from Massachusetts, do you get bent when people call it chowDER instead of chowDAH?
[B]Mandias:[/B] It's chowda! I'll kill you! I'll kill all of you! Especially those of you in the jury!!!
[B]Brak:[/B] Another wankin' reference to The Simpsons! Who did you think was the cutest Spice Girl?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Ginger. Well, not cute so much, but she had/has great tits.
[B]Brak:[/B] Typical. What's your favorite creature of the night?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Werewolf, mostly because it's never been done *just* right.
[B]Brak:[/B] How would you do it *just* right?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Have the person have more control over themselves when they're a wolf, and, by contrast, have them still be kinda wolfish between full moons. Ginger Snaps delivered on the latter idea, at least.
[B]Brak:[/B] Would you ever want to be a werewolf?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Sure. It'd be an experience.
[B]Brak:[/B] Oh, crap. I just knocked a candle off my computer and it shattered and I was cleaning up the glass and split my finger open. BRB!
[B]Mandias:[/B] My poor darling baby *kisses finger*
[B]Some time elapses…[/B]
[B]Brak:[/B] I am sooooooo tempted to leave this part in! Ha. Thank you, sweetness. It's not that bad a cut...at least nothing two WWF "Slam Care Bandages" (of The Undertaker and Mankind) can't take care of.
[B]Mandias:[/B] Do it!
[B]Brak:[/B] I will!
[B]Mandias:[/B] Appropriate, they had some bloody matches...
[B]Brak:[/B] Speaking of blood, so you could kill people if you were a werewolf?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Well, that'd be my dilemma. But I wouldn't be as virtuous as most victims of lycanthropia.
[B]Brak:[/B] Maybe you should practice howling during the next full moon...you know, just in case.
[B]Mandias:[/B] How about no?
[B]Brak:[/B] I remember a conversation we had ages ago where we talked about midgets and you bemoaned the fact bleeding hearts would be against having them as house pets. Would you really want a midget for a pet?
[B]Mandias:[/B] No, not REALLY, they just amuse and frighten me at the same time.
[B]Brak:[/B] They have that affect on a lot of people. Is there anything you would like to add about yourself, the Cult or in general?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Not a thing.
[B]Brak:[/B] Last question, then: Mr. T has faced some formidable opponents in his day…Boba Fett, Megatron, his own abstract thoughts…and has defeated them all. [IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v101/fiberopticjesus/Mr_T.gif[/IMG]Mr. T vs. Brock's ego: who's going down in [I]that[/I] match up?
[B]Mandias:[/B] Hehe. Brock's ego. It wouldn't be able to withstand Tha T's pity, let alone T himself.
[B]Brak:[/B] Haha. I do believe you're right, but it would be a close one.
[B]Brak:[/B] Looks like you're out of the hot seat now, Mandias.
[B]Mandias:[/B] You give good interview.
[B]Brak:[/B] Thanks a pantload.[/QUOTE]
hOW DOES THIS WORK CAN i BE THE WRENCH IN THE MACHININERY iT SEEMS SO JERK OFF .
I've said this before, but I'll say it again:
I LOVE OZY!
I just read the interview. It has Brak. That's one plus. It has Simpsons references a plenty. That's another plus. Then Ozymandias(not quite comfortable calling you Ozy, sir) lists me as one of his favorite cultists that he does remember! I love it!
p.s. I'm my favorite cultist too, you know.
My brand new 2011 halloween comp:
http://soundcloud.com/brosupremo/hallowmix-2-the-deadening/s-BKf8z
[QUOTE=Brother Supremo]
p.s. I'm my favorite cultist too, you know.[/QUOTE]
Funny, I thought Milroy Borden was.
Who are the 3 cheap honky fucks that actually took time out of their day to rate this thread a 1?
It's not easy having a good time.
Even smiling makes my face ache.
[QUOTE=Ozymandias]Who are the 3 cheap honky fucks that actually took time out of their day to rate this thread a 1?[/QUOTE]
Alan Moore, Terry Gilliam and Francis Ford Coppola.
I was here. Then I wasn't. Then I was again.
Brak did a high quality job here. Not that I'd expect any less from the gal!