"My seedless grapes have seeds in them." - Douchebaggery w/ Jill's Tit and Bigshrimpn

[SIZE=5][U]You have entered [The Directory][/U] [/SIZE]:reporter:

[bigshrimpn]: [I]Are you interviewed out? Wanna do this? You're eating grapes too? Fuckin grapes. You buy a bag, and they are phenomenal. I mean they're firm, juicy. You love these grapes. And at 60 calories per serving, they are a great alternative to just about anything else that would be proper to much on while you're on the computer or watching a movie. Candy or popcorn for instance. I don't know about you but when I'm doing either of the above, I like to be munching on something. It doesn't matter much what it is. I just have to some something in my mouth (insert dick joke here). So you fuck this bag of grapes up in between exclamations to the people joining you of how fucking good these grapes are. They're on sale at Publix for 99 cents a pound so you don't feel too guilty when you polish off the whole bag. You stop in the next night after a shitty day at work to pick up another bag. You take them home and you are genuinely excited. I've always said that buying grapes is a crapshoot. Sometimes you get a bag that is heavenly. The other times, not so much. They may look identical to the bag that you were on the verge of making love to the day before, but these grapes are far from "fuckable". The are shit. The texture is horrible. They are sour. The skin is so thick that if not for swallowing them, you could chew on them like fucking bubble gum. They probably stay in your system for 7 years. There is no medium with grapes, no grey area. You either get a bag that makes you feel like you could die while eating them and be content, or you get a bag that fills you with so much disappointment that you want to die anyway. Fuckin grapes man. Fuckin grapes.[/I]

[Jill's Tit]: :bryce:

[bigshrimpn]: [I]So how does this work?[/I]

[Jill's Tit]: [B]I guess I just start with the questions...[/B]

[bigshrimpn]: [I]Ok, go[/I]

[B]What's the story behind your username? (I personally know, but other people might not...) Also, I was gonna ask this question to Bearchaser... but since he's not around, do you think he really chase bears?[/B]

[I]FIRST!!1![/I]

[B]Wow.[/B]

[I]Nah for real...[/I]

[B]It saddens me that you were WAITING to do that. For how long this has been in planning, I do not even want to know.[/B]

[I]I know, right? A long time I've been waiting to do that. Anyway, my username is taken from the company that I started a couple years ago Big Shrimp'N. It was an internet based company that shipped fresh Florida seafood anywhere in the continental US. I had hats, T-shirts, beer koozies, keychains, all my friends had the bumper stickers on their rides. I sold the company and moved away. The cleverness of the name followed me. Not really that clever but the Spring Breakers loved it. Also, I know for a fact that Bearchaser chases bears. He chased the wrong one and that's why you haven't seen him in a while.[/I]

[B]Really? You go with him on these escapades?[/B]

[I]I have asked if I can accompany him, He says it is something he must do alone. He really takes it seriously.[/I]

[B]Peculiar... Moving on. Say you were given infinite funds to make a room exactly how you want it to be. What would you do with this room, assuming you can add to it whatever you want, change its size, shape, and location?[/B]

[I]First of all, the room would be HUGE. I have lived in several very nice places, but the bedrooms have never been of any size to brag about. This room would have to serve as a bedroom, as I would make it so awesome that i would never want to leave it. Sound first. Home theater madness. Subs, highs, lows, the works. Music is my life. I room is not complete without it. Big TV. I know a lot of other people (Night, etc) don't watch TV. I do. I love it. Almost as much as I love reading. TV, movies (I've got a DVD collection that is 600+) I have no shame in watching TV. It just shouldn't get excessive. I stretch when I watch TV. Do sit-ups, push-ups. It doesn't always have to be synonymous with laziness. What else. The walls would be lined with books. Every time I see a book mentioned on the Cult I would add it with the hopes that at some point in my life, I would get to read it. I would need a bed. A nice Tempurpedic (which is what I have now and anytime I sleep on something else my back lets me know that It noticed. A sex swing, obviously. A stripper pole. I could get more creative but I think there's some more questions and I don't want to get hung up on the infinite amount of stuff I would buy if I had unlimited funds. Oh and a PS3. And another stripper pole.[/I]

[Main Room]: jane s. has entered

[I]How did you get in here Jane?[/I]

[B]She... she's not.[/B]

[I]Oh that was the main room. Sorry.[/I]

[B]Derf.[/B]

[I]fhjfjkl[/I]

[B]FAIL.[/B]

[B]Here's a scenario: A clerk comes to you with a blown-up (in size) photo of a gory crime scene and says, 'I can't use this in court, the blood's too green.' What do you do?[/B]

[I]PWNED!!1![/I]

[B]Good answer.[/B]

[I]In size? As in like, life sized? Is he a gas station clerk?[/I]

[B]If... if you want him to be...[/B]

[I]Why does a clerk have a pic of a crime scene?[/I]

[B]WELL. A good reason that a clerk would have a picture of a - HEY, who the fuck is interviewing whom, anyway?![/B]

[I]Would I would do, obviously, is... Take the pic, download it to my computer, PM it to you or Essga and have you photoshop the blood to red. Then I would charge him for the service and spend the money on getting us shit-faced.[/I]

[B]Very well thought out.[/B]

[Jill's Tit claps.]

[B]Did you think that the previous question was kind of a bullshit one? It kind of was, wasn't it? Nevermind, don't answer that. Here: Are you superstitious? Have you ever seen - or believe you've seen - a ghost?[/B]

[I]I read your interview so I know what you think about ghosts. That's a cool way to think about it. I've never been witness to a ghost so I can't say that I actually believe in them. The fact that theres no real evidence (such as a real photograph) of one helps me in my denial. Then again I guess anything's possible. After the things I've been experiencing lately, I'm very much more open minded about things that I used to consider silly. Superstitious? As in walking under ladders and black cats? No. Not at all. I do not believe in astrology, nor do I believe in psychics. Anything that is beyond scientific explinanation is simply not real. In my opinion. There may or may not be exceptions to these rules.[/I]

[B]But do you believe in vampires? More importantly, do you believe Sarah Michelle Gellar slays them?[/B]

[I]Vampires are fictional. Sarah Michelle Gellar is smokin hot and yes, I would slay her.
That's what you were asking right? Remember when she had that kiss with that chick in Cruel Intentions and the little string of spit was still attached when she pulled away? Man, that was hot. What were we talking about?[/I]

[B]Masturbation. That's what. What's the first thought that always goes through your head after you are finished masturbating?[/B]

[I]Well, I've pretty much learned erotic asphyxiation through masturbation. I can cut off my oxygen supply myself better that another could with hands around my throat. I mean it's something I've done 5 times a day for 13 years. I'm pretty good at it. Because of this skill, I
have no thoughts right after I masturbate. It's an empty, thoughtless void where you feel no pain, no sense of being, just on overpowering sense of completion, physical content. It's better than any drug, thought it's doing way to big of a dose of nitrous-oxide. It can be very dangerous ( ask the dude from INXS) so any hot chicks reading this ahould not attempt this without proper instructuions from a trained professional. Like me. In person.[/I]

[B]Dude, gross, you probably get your #$%^&* all over yourself and don't even realize it...
What? s p u n k is censored? Gay.[/B]

[I]The fact that anything is censored on this site is gay.
I mean dude, we're some #$%^&* d up people...[/I]

[Main Room]: Adelheid has entered

[I]This isn't the JK Rowling fansite.[/I]

[B]What are you talking about. This is a family oriented community.
FAMILY ORIENTED.[/B]

[I]Yeah, the Manson family maybe.[/I]

[B]Speaking of which... Favorite alcoholic beverage? Least favorite virgin beverage?[/B]

[I]I drink Bacardi and Diet Coke because of my diet. I would hardly say it's my favorite. I love a good flavored martini, not that Bond shit. I mean like a chocolate martini or a Pineapple Upside Down Cake martini with graham cracker crumbs on the rim. If I'm at the
beach or something like that I drink Margaritas or fruity drinks. "When in Rome" and all that. I shoot Jagermeister. Nothing else. I can't stand olives. Dirty martini = gross. I'm also not a big fan of whiskey. Or virgins. You know, it's like "thanks for nothing".[/I]

[B]Cute. So that's to say, you drink nothing but alcohol?[/B]

[I]If I'm drinking, it's alchohol or water. Or Diet Creme Soda. Yummmmm!!! No tea. No juice. Too much sugar/calories.[/I]

[B]Gotta watch after that figure, eh? Here's another scenario: Art-hating aliens have come to Earth and destroyed everyone's entertainment collections, and started upon the destruction of every Barnes & Noble, Virgin Megastore, and the such. As they set fire to the very last book/music/dvd store, they are killed. You only have time to save five items from each of the three categories. Which five books/cd's/dvd's would you save? Keep in mind, your own collection has been destroyed.[/B]

[I]If I save an IPod, do I get to fill it up?[/I]

[B]Dude, I #$%^&* ng hate Apple and anything associated to it, why would you even ask me that?[/B]

[I]Ok, got it. Five books: The Bachman Books by Steven King (Rage, The Long Walk, The Running Man and Roadwork), Survivor by CP, The Dragonlance Chronicles (which I read twice a year, and is probably my favorite book/trilogy) and probably a couple I haven't read, probably Fear and Loathing and maybe the Bible. Lots of words to keep me preoccupied from the end of the world in there, CD's? This is where everyone is gonna dislike me, if they already didn't. I would take 311-Music, Stadium Arcadium by the RHCP, Elephant by the White Stripes, Vulgar Display of Power by Pantera and Adreneline Rush by Twista. These are albums I know front to back and haven't gotten tired of yet. I know they are not as artsy or underground as most of the stuff that everyone here listens to but neither am I. DVDs? Fight Club, which is my favorite movie of all time and has been since I saw it. Boondock Saints, Oh Brother Where Art Thou?, Requiem For A Dream. Lastly I would take this home movie I made with my ex ex girlfriend.
She was soooo hot.[/I]

[B]You can buy that last one at Virgin? What's it called? Is it still in stock?![/B]

[I]Oh yeah I have to get at Virgin. Do they sell porn?[/I]

[B]They do, actually.[/B]

[I]We don't have those here. I guess any movie I could find with midgets and felching and I'm happy.[/I]

[B]Did Spike just PM you?[/B]

[I]Yeah, you too?[/I]

[B]Ahuh.[/B]

[I]What'd he say?[/I]

[B]Asked what we were doing. He asked me if we were getting high. I said, on life. What'd you tell him?[/B]

[I]I fogot Xec's response... I told him interview because he's a moderator.[/I]

[B]Gay. Did he ask you what the Directory was?[/B]

[I]No. I didn't want him to kick us out or something.[/I]

[B]The response was something like, "A paradox, Charles. Where is _____"[/B]

[Spike] created room "HOT SEXXY CHAT 21++"

[B]Hahaha[/B]

[I]LOLOLOL[/I]

[B]Look at him being all jealous and #$%^&*[/B]

[I]Yeah he called us gay. And it was "__________Charles. It's a paradox."[/I]

[B]No. I'm closer.[/B]

[I]You sure?[/I]

[B]Yep. PM him to be positive, though.[/B]

[Jill's Tit] created room "In America, you only have to be 18++ to enter HOT SEXXY CHAT"

[Jill's Tit] created room "Bitch."

[bigshrimpn] created room "Don't let Spike in."

[B]Hahaha... Anyway, now that we've retaliated... moving on?[/B]

[jane s.] created room "In Nebraska you have to be 19!"

[jugal] created room "On the Cult you have to be 53"

[B]Ah, Jane has joined the party...[/B]

[Spike] created room "Chaste Mormon Singles"

[Jill's Tit] created room "My dick is so big, it needs its own chatroom."

[I]HAHAHA[/I]

[I]You see Tomstrongs dick joke on our thread?[/I]

[jane s.] created room "If you make another room about your dick I'll ban you."

[B]LOL[/B]

[jane s.] created room "fr realsz."

[bigshrimpn] created room "JT got busted LOLOL"

[Jill's Tit] created room "I love Jane."

[bigshrimpn] created room "Me too"

[Jill's Tit] created room "With all my di - heart."

[I]watch it dude. she was for real

LOLOLOL[/I]

[B]'kay?[/B]

[I]yes[/I]

[B]Que?[/B]

[I]yes[/I]

[B]Anywhooo....[/B]

[I]yes[/I]

[B]So c'mon, if you were Archie, who would you fuck, Betty or Veronica?[/B]

[I]I'm into dark haired chicks even though I always end up with blondes. My past 4 or 5 girls have been blonde and I'd say that blondes make up 85 % of the women I've dated. I guess it follows my "grass is always greener on the other side" theory. I'm sure If had an
abundance of dark haired chicks, I'd be all about blondes. Definitely Veronica. Wasn't that the name of your two serious relationships? Is that where this question stemmed from? I've got one question for you before we continue. It's a yes or no question.[/I]

[B]Betty, because I've always been into blondes but ended up with brunettes. (Victoria, by the way.) But what were you gonna say?[/B]

[I]The question. Yes or No? ready? (that's not the question)[/I]

[B]YES.
NO.
GO.[/B]

[I]Does your mom know you're gay?[/I]

[Main Room]: Lady Chaos has entered at 33 pm

[I]LOLOLOLOL[/I]

[B]Yeah, she caught you sucking my dick, remember? And then Jane walked in and tried
to kill us with a chainsaw.
AND SUCCEEDED!!![/B]

[I]Oh yeah. But that just means I'm gay or that we're in prison.
Okay next ?[/I]

[B]Alright.
If you got to be a woman for one whole day, what would you, as a woman, try to accomplish? Would you prefer to be any specific woman? Who? Why?[/B]

[I]First I would masturbate. I've always been curious as to what a womans' orgasm feels like. I'm pretty sure it's the same as ours, maybe a little more intense. I really can't think of a specific woman I'd like to be. Maybe a chick I was banging because that would be a trip!!
Yeah I would definitely want to be a woman who has some kind of interaction with me, if that's possible. Hopefully I would have the woman's mind and would really want to see how the #$%^&* that comes out of my mouth is heard/taken from a womans point of view. I think of a couple men I would want to be, but only so that I could bang their wives. [/I]

[B];]
Was Blink 182 ever funny? Seriously.[/B]

[I] No.
Not even a little bit.
Though I quite enjoy their music.[/I]

[B]Okay, so you're not as twelve as I thought you were. Good to know you've got at least SOME... priorities. [/B]

[I]They're good and they're song are not very hard to play. I think they had the novice guitar player in mind when they wrote them.[/I]

[B]Say you're Batman, and the Joker has the love of your life and your mum tied up and hanging over separate vats of lava. You're not as cool as Spider-Man, so you can't save both of them. Do you save your love? Do you save your mum?
Do you shove Jokey in the vat with both of 'em and go on a date with Harley Quinn?
(^ Not an acceptable answer.)[/B]

[I]I save my mom. No question. Loves of your life are replaceable. I'm not big on the soul mate idea. I think love is something that is grown over a period of time between two people, not something that happens at first site. You cannot love someone you don't truly know.
Love is realizing their flaws and accepting them. Love is not magical, it's hard #$%^&* ng work. Plus I'm a mamas boy.[/I]

[B]Awwwe... Harley and I will be expecting you and mum over for dinner next Tuesday. Bring your poison antidote kit. She's... creepy. [/B]

[I]She's my girl!! (Listening to the Gym Class Heroes version of Under the Bridge.)[/I]

[B]Nice![/B]

[I]You turned me on to them. You see my post?[/I]

[B]I'll let you put them on next time we're at a bar.[/B]

[I]You don't even read peoples posts do you?[/I]

[B]I CAN'T READ, YOU ASSHOLE! Now... Imagine I come up to you in a restaurant and, after pulling out a gun, I tell you I will shoot you in your #$%^&* ng face if you don't approach the girl sitting at the end of the bar and initiate a normal conversation. What would your opening line to her be? Remember, I am watching you. [/B]

[I]First of all, put your gun away. If the girl is attractive, I've probably already been over to introduce myself. If she's not attractive, you can go ahead and shoot. Nah, I'm not shallow. Good conversation can come from anybody. I do prefer conversation with females. Dudes are just usually really fake or try to hard to impress someone they don't know. It's a hetero dude thing. Gay men are way cooler. I read the situation when I'm approaching strange women. My first line would completely different every time. I like to come across with something personal, perhaps a unique compliment, something that didn't sound like something generic that I use on everyone I approach. I'm very good at initiating conversations with people I don't know. I've got the fact that they don't know me either going for me. Plus I don't get shy or embarrassed. It's kinda like getting up on stage, it may be overwhelming at first but once you've done it a million times, it gets very routine, very comfortable.[/I]

[B]The whole gun part was just to insure you didn't say "I WON'T APPROACH NO BITCH!!!" This was one of the six questions I actually planned out and didn't throw out, that I was gonna ask bearchaser. You, I know you don't need a push. But I WAS curious what a general opening line from you would be....[/B]

[I]I know that doesn't help you out and that you were looking for advice on approaching women but that's all I can tell you. Read the situation.[/I]

[B]Eat me.[/B]

[I]"Hi. My name's Mike" usually works.[/I]

[I]But you gotta smile big
And your name has to be Mike
Or else you're starting the conversation off with a lie.[/I]

[B]*Cough*
In the previous question, what did you imagine the girl looked like?
If you didn't imagine any kind of girl, do it now. Perfect girl: GO![/B]

[I]The chick from Anger Management. Only because the situation reminded me of that one.
The perfect girl?[/I]

[B]Sure, go ahead.[/B]

[I]No such thing. Though the girl I met last weekend was pretty close. 27, homeowner, branch manager of a bank, real estate on the side, single, never been married, no kids, and you saw her pics. Perfection is overrated. Flaws make us unique. If she was perfect she'd know better than to even talk to me.[/I]

[B]Didn't someone once say, love is finding an imperfect person perfect? Am I pulling that outta my ass?[/B]

[I]Never heard of it but that's about right.[/I]

[B] Would you ask anyone on the cult out for a date?
Wait, that's a bad question, aimed at you. Of course you would. Name only one cultie, and why.[/B]

[I]Sure would. But don't get your hopes up. It would definitely be a chick. It's so hard to judge a persons personality over the web. Though I really feel that as tempted as people are to put on fronts, this site probably has the realest people. I rarely doubt anyones stories on here. It just seems a little more real here. So many of the chicks here seem very interesting. I would definitely ask Bess out if she wasn't married. I feel some weird connection to her for reasons that only god knows. Jane is funny, witty,clever,cute. But too nice. I'm very cynical. She is way to positive for me. Maybe myshotgunface. Maybe Lady
Chaos. Hard to say dude. Maybe Judascow. Probably Moonie because we have so little in common that I know it would be interesting.[/I]

[B] I knew it.[/B]

[I] What?[/I]

[B] The truth comes out.[/B]

[I] The best of both worlds!!! Nah I'm playing. [/I]
With my emotions? Yes, yes you are.

[Jill's Tit pimp smacks Big.]

[bigshrimpn dodges.]

[I]I'm quick like rabbit.[/I]

[B] You don't say...[/B]

[I]But I do love me some Moonie.[/I]

[B]Btw, way to completely fail at naming only ONE CULTIE.[/B]

[I]Haha[/I]

[B]Okay, are you ready?!
You can only answer this question with five words... What are they?[/B]

[I]Is that the question dickbreath?[/I]

[B]Very good.[/B]

[I]Thanks[/I]

[B]So anyway. If you could be part of any war, past or present, real or fictional, which war
would it be? What part would you play in it?[/B]

[I]Good question. You really put some though into these. Let's see...
I would say the War of the Lance (from the before-mentioned book)but that's so far off the radar around here that I'll go with the Lincoln County war. I always had an infactuation with Billy the Kid. It started with Young Guns but grew the more and more I learned about him. I
loved what they stood for in that war. The friendship overtones throughout the whole ordeal. The mystery surrounding the outcome. I always wanted to ride horses and shoot six shooters and visit brothels and be dirty and spit in public and drink while playing poker in saloons. I think the wars in Gangs of New York would've been cool to partake in. Organized crime wars would be a distant third. You know, like Capone shit.[/I]

[B]I still gotta watch that movie.[/B]

[I]For real? GONY?[/I]

[B]Yeah...[/B]

[I]And you live in New York? That #$%^&* is real dude[/I]

[B]OBVIOUSLY.
/sarcasm.[/B]

[I]When you see it you won't think "obviously". You'll be like, this can't be real. Those niggas beat the #$%^&* out of each other with their fists and leave em in the street to die. Real gangsters. Not ones that drive by in a car, shoot and speed off.[/I]

[B]I discovered an attempted murder once.[/B]

[I] How do you discover an attempted murder? Dude was still alive?[/I]

[B]Bunch of us were in the city (Manhattan) going to a show, and we were looking for this venue, but we got lost. We were really baked.[/B]

[I]Of course.[/I]

[B]And as we were passing this alley, I saw this dude like, laying there. In a puddle. Which was nothing new for New York.[/B]

[I]Right.[/I]

[B]But being stoned, and an asshole, I wanted to see if I could fuck with him. So did my friends. When we walked up to him, his throat was slit, and he was laying there, slightly twitching. So we called the cops and stuff, acted as sober as we could (those who couldn't stood at the side, haha). They took my information down, because I did most of the talking (surprise). And when they called me a few weeks later to see if they can get more info, I asked if he died. They said no. Though, they did mention that he was deprived of oxygen for so long, he might not be the same as before (aka, he might now be retarded)...[/B]

[I] That's nuts. I'm from a small town. That doesn't happen where i'm from
Yeah. Brain damage. He wasn't coming out of that unscathed.[/I]

[B]And he wasn't a bum or anything. He was wearing normal clothing. Like, he was gonna go to a casual bar or something. Button-up shirt and tie. Yannow.[/B]

[I]You should have put him out of his misery.
He probably would've appreciated.[/I]

[B] Totally. I had my megablaster and everything.[/B]

[I]LOLOL[/I]

[Jill's Tit rolls his eyes.]

[B] Okay. This is your opportunity to say the most honest thing you have ever said. Go.[/B]

[I] I do not belive in god. I know what happens when you die. I don't care if you believe me or not. I don't care if my sanity is questioned. I know a majority of the answers that people spend their life searching for. I've been informed of them by higher beings. This knowledge
makes me feel superior. I can't help it. I have no sympathy, nor patience for naive, narrow-minded people. I'm nuttier than a squirrel turd. I'm pretty much okay with this. Me in a nutshell!![/I]

[Jill's Tit rubs his chin and nods, in acceptance of your answer.]

[B]Speaking of which, what's your biggest running lie to date? (No, not a lie about running, #$%^&*tard)[/B]

[I]That my business is doing great. It's not. Starting a business from scratch is tough. And expensive. It's kinda like Vegas, if you don't have the money to keep going, to try to win your money back, you lose. You go home. It's all about having enough capital to stay open no matter how bad business is. I don't. I'm almost out of money. I'm doing great business, but not enough to keep the doors open. This is really hard to tell to everyone that really believes in you. They ask "how's business" and they don't want to hear the truth. Especially not family. Especially not investors. So you just smile and say that everything is great. It's a pretty big lie.[/I]

[B]Shit. Hit it up with bank manager girl! Unless, you know, she's lying too. Imagine? That's what it is. She's a compulsive liar. Hah...[/B]

[I] I'm trying dude. Trust me, I'm trying. She could be. You never know these days.[/I]

[B] Speaking of LIES, what is sex with you like? ;D
If you never had sex, shrimpie, speculate.
:P[/B]

[I]It's horrible. I don't know how many times I've heard the "Yeah, I just don't get off during regular sex" or "it's very hard to please me" blah blah. I've dedicated a good bit of my life to sex. Like Sean Bateman said, "if a girl doesn't come, what's the point?". There's nothing
worse than sex with a woman the first time and she is not satisfied. There's nothing better (or more dangerous) than when she is. Sex is very mental. Especially on the woman's part. Never go to bed with a woman who is convinced that she will not get off. It's your job to implant the notion in her head that maybe, just maybe, this will be the time that it happens. Her being positive that she won't creates a wall that no matter how good you #$%^&* cannot be broken. If you believe you can't, then you can't and visa versa. It's also physical. The man has to do his part, even if that just involves laying there, being a tool for the woman to use because she knows how to get herself off better than you do, and holding it for as long as she needs. Sex with me is rough. Fun. Kinky. Dirty. Consenting? Sometimes. Memorable? Everytime. I could be wrong about all of this but I'm pretty sure I'm not.[/I]

[B]I'll say that I agree with your mentality about sex, but not much more, as this is in danger of not being an interview anymore. Haha... [/B]

[I] I highly doubt that an interview between you and I has very high expectations anyway. [/I]

[B]Not that it matters. Save one, I'm out of questions. 'Sabout time, though. I guess. I could do this all night, and I'm sure you could, too. But, poor everyone else!
So that said... is Cujo THAT good of a name for a cat?[/B]

[I]Honestly, I think it's a very good name for a cat. If the cat is vicious, like mine, it fits perfect. If not, it has the same effect as the biggest guy in the bar being named Tiny, or the least intelligent one being named Blaze or Fast Eddie. You can't go wrong with it.[/I]

[I] My seedless grapes have seeds in them. Another #$%^&*ing thing about grapes.[/I]

[B] You're still eating the grapes?! Dude, you gotta cut it out with those grapes. You're obsessed with the grapes![/B]

[I] They're so good dude. So that's it?[/I]

[B] Guess so...[/B]

[I] Hmm. I kind of thought this would end when one of us passed out.[/I].

[B] Me too.[/B]

[I] Maybe We should do this.[/I]

[B] Do what?[/B]

[I] Google something like "questions to ask in an interview" and go back and forth between the both of us asking random questions.[/I]

[B]That's what [censored] did.[/B]

[I]With who? You? No. That was FPT.[/I]

[B]I was looking up "interview questions on google" when I was first assigned with a task to interview someone, and I saw this list of super generic questions.[/B]

[I]And [censored] had a bunch of them?[/I]

[B]And then, [censored] interview with NOT me (I forgot who, maybe [censored], it was a while ago...) had those exact questions. Like, listed as they were on that site[/B]

[I]hahaha. wow. busted.[/I]

[B]Totally.[/B]

~ INTERNET SPASM WHERE I GET KICKED OFF ~

[I]Wtf?[/I]

[B]Mah bizzle. My internet flaked out for a second there, I got dis - OH #$%^&*!! THE INTERVIEW! I DIDN'T GET TO COPY/PASTE IT!!!!![/B]

[I]You aint got all that?[/I]

[B]fuuuuuuckkkkkkkkkk[/B]

[I]For reals? Seriously??[/I]

[B]Duuuude...[/B]

[I]FAIL!!![/I]

[B]LAWL.[/B]

[I]I scrolled up but it's on the last question.[/I]

[B]I'm adding this part, though.[/B]
[B]'Cuz yor mad gallable HUR HUR.[/B]

[I]Dude u suck.[/I]

[Jill’s Tit teabags bigshrimpn]

[SIZE=5][I][B]~FIN.~[/B][/I][/SIZE] :1244: