Drunken=Sexy?: Drunk Mr. Brown interviewed by Milroy Borden
[COLOR=Red][I][B]The following took place last month and was almost lost forever. Recently, it was pulled straight out of my deep dark sexual bunkers. Enjoy . . .[/B][/I][/COLOR]
MrBrown: bro supreme
Milroy Borden: Muthafucka, what the fuck?
Milroy Borden: Muthafucka, what the fuck?
Milroy Borden: Drunk on what?
Milroy Borden: Are you a violent or happy or sad drunk?
MrBrown: sad rubnk
MrBrown: melanchioly fuck
Milroy Borden: cheer up, my sad little drunk.
MrBrown: im no t treakky sa d now
MrBrown: but i mean, i tend to get sad when im drink
Milroy Borden: So you're okay?
MrBrown: just drink
MrBrown: can I ask you an honesst to god qyestion?
Milroy Borden: I'm straight.
MrBrown: wise ass
MrBrown: what de diklio with yiu abd fnd==m?
Milroy Borden: What was that?
MrBrown: are you in something something with fullmet,.bark/?
Milroy Borden: I know used to chat withn her.
Milroy Borden: I PM her every now and then.
MrBrown: too ftrunk
Milroy Borden: I can see that. But you're charming when you're drunk.
MrBrown: im hertero too
Milroy Borden: It's okay for a straight dude to call another dude charming.
Milroy Borden: So what kind of beer are you drinking?
MrBrown: from yhje tap
Milroy Borden: I'm drinking white trash beer. Pabst Blue Ribbon.
MrBrown: Frank Boots ber
MrBrown: BKUVE VELVET
Milroy Borden: Fuck Heineken! Pabst Blue Ribbon!
MrBrown: lets drink;t o fucking!W
Milroy Borden: You know a lot about movies, huh?
Milroy Borden: Jane says you know more about movies drunk, than she does sober.
MrBrown: I know lees about women
Milroy Borden: You should do an interview while drunk for the Cult.
MrBrown: lets sataryt
Milroy Borden: Who can you beat up?
MrBrown: my sister
MrBrown: that U jnow for surre
Milroy Borden: How do you feel about cops?
MrBrown: theyr doni they jons but some get off onteryr power and csuk hard, I hot one.
Milroy Borden: Do you dig porno?
MrBrown: hell yeahs
Milroy Borden: I'm having trouble coming up with good questions to ask you. What pisses you off?
MrBrown: stpudi questins
Milroy Borden: Which Cultist do you hate?
MrBrown: I dont hate anyone
Milroy Borden: Are you gonna say hate is a strong word or something?
MrBrown: maybe llike som e less, but i cant hate no one, cause i dont knoww ho theyr ae
Milroy Borden: I'd ask you who you love on the Cult, but we already know.
Milroy Borden: Maddy right?
MrBrown: chcej out the vbifg brain on bro!
Milroy Borden: Say, we're at the Cult Party, and you see me hitting on Maddy, what then?
MrBrown: i say good lick, she her own woman wit her own mind. she can ganlde someon hiting in her
Milroy Borden: So you're not the protective type of something that doesn't really belong to you like I am?
MrBrown: i raed that line three tims and stll dont understand what uou mean
Milroy Borden: I don't even know what I mean.
MrBrown: I undersnatnd
Milroy Borden: Even drunk, you're way more rational then i am.
MrBrown: so my mother sayds
Milroy Borden: Bill Paxton or Bill Pullman?
MrBrown: tuf call, pazton is the man as Severen fromh NHEAR DAJL and Puman is saweome in LOST HIGHWAYY and, fuck
MrBrown: pazxton i huess
Milroy Borden: What is your favorite film with Tom Berenger?
MrBrown: good one
MrBrown: nest queston
Milroy Borden: You don't like Platoon?
MrBrown: next questibn
Milroy Borden: Dig any Oliver Stone films?
MrBrown: NARUAL BOHRN JILLARS
MrBrown: Woody Harleson is hellacool in that one
Milroy Borden: I see you riding a big red horse . . .
Milroy Borden: I just laugh every time Juliette Lewis says that.
MrBrown: wile irunating
Milroy Borden: Yes.
Milroy Borden: After she's done saying all of that shit, Woody Harleson in his redneck voice says: That is poetry.
MrBrown: Michek an d Maddy knox
Milroy Borden: Don't get us wrong. We respect hum life. But If I was a mass murderer, I'd be Mickey and Mallory.
MrBrown: Jak ceouac, mickey and mallory know
MrBrown: im so drunk
MrBrown: arre you gonna psit this?
Milroy Borden: Favorite music?
Milroy Borden: Maybe I may post this. Edit the unfunny parts.
Milroy Borden: I'll do that all tomorry.
MrBrown: classicla, hip hop, bob dylan, jazzm. soul
Milroy Borden: Hip hop. Do you have Dr. Dre's The Chronic?
MrBrown: I stole it
MrBrown: back in the day
Milroy Borden: Niggas who talk shit, get dealt with real quik!
Milroy Borden: If that bitch can't swim, then that bitch is bound to drizzown!
MrBrown: people dislike uoy Bro?
Milroy Borden: Yes, people be dizzlikin' me. So you know what I do?
Milroy Borden: I dizzlike those muthafuckin' niggas back too!
MrBrown: fuck em
MrBrown: un tha hizzole
MrBrown: post this shit man
Milroy Borden: I will soon, nigga.
MrBrown: ur u back/?
Milroy Borden: . . .
Milroy Borden: . . . no.
Milroy Borden: Are we still running for prezedint?
MrBrown: yes, kick that Bushs ass
Milroy Borden: Got a VCR in the back of my car that I ganked from the Slauson Swap Meet
And motherfuckers better not try to stop me Cuz they will see that I can't be stopped Cuz I'ma cock my Glock and pop til they all drop!
MrBrown: 1.2.3 andto tha fo, snop doggy dog and dorcta dre i s ath the oddor
Milroy Borden: He'z hollin' one-eight-seven with his dick in yo mouth, beeyatch!
MrBrown: nah, bitch you;d habve a dick in yourr moth
Milroy Borden: Okay, questions. Netherlands you say you were from. Drugs?
MrBrown: alcholos a drug, nucitines a drug
MrBrown: no soft or hardfurhs
Milroy Borden: Do you smoke pot?
Milroy Borden: I smoke crack, nigga.
Milroy Borden: Here in the Unizzle Stizzles of Americizzle, it's fuckin' required.
MrBrown: fo shizzle?
Milroy Borden: Snoop Dogg was on TV telling me to vote.
MrBrown: vote fo?
Milroy Borden: He's all,"Go out therez and vozzle fozzle da 1 you want. Peace."
Milroy Borden: Jennifer Anniston is telling the American women to get off their fat housewife asses and go vote.
MrBrown: with her trained ass she says that?
MrBrown: to gat asses?
Milroy Borden: Ben Affleck Told me to vote too.
MrBrown: what did you tell ben?
Milroy Borden: I told him I will go see Surviving Christmas.
Milroy Borden: But I was lying!
Milroy Borden: I'd never see it!
MrBrown: Ben assfuck
Milroy Borden: And he found out I lied to him, so he came to my house.
Milroy Borden: Yeah, he said: Come out, muthafucka! I know you in there!
MrBrown: dod you hide?
MrBrown: or is he lying again?
MrBrown: cuz i know he does
MrBrown: he said he can write
Milroy Borden: I came out with my big dick and raped the fuck out of him.
MrBrown: but i herd him make sentences ininerveiws and he cant!
Milroy Borden: He's a fagoo. He dates Jennifer Garner as a smokescreen.
MrBrown: fugedabout it
Milroy Borden: But back on topic, what's your fav Ben Affleck film?
Milroy Borden: I remember that one. Didn't it show titties?
Milroy Borden: What's your fav titty scene?
MrBrown: Jason kee's the man
MrBrown: cant decide
MrBrown: so many
MrBrown: smart ass
Milroy Borden: My old man calls me smartass all the time. Are you my old man?
MrBrown: permit me to say this, beacuse im older than you:
Milroy Borden: Waitaminit! You're typing has become clearer and clearer!
MrBrown: its earler and earlier
Milroy Borden: You're getting slightly sober, aren't ya?
MrBrown: been drinkin coke since i saterd the chat
MrBrown: still a bit dizy
Milroy Borden: Classic Coke or C2 Coke aka Fag coke?
MrBrown: wait a mnite
MrBrown: your mums calling me
Milroy Borden: So, non fag coke?
MrBrown: correchat mundo
MrBrown: sp posy this chat
Milroy Borden: I want to organize it.
Milroy Borden: Then I shall post it.
MrBrown: ornagize drunk chat?
MrBrown: good kuck!
Milroy Borden: Just the names.
Milroy Borden: But not tonight. Tomorry, definitely.
Milroy Borden: I'm pretty tired. I woke up at 7am this morning to go work at that damn kennel.
MrBrown: dogg pung!
Milroy Borden: A dog diarrhea-ed on my shoe.
MrBrown: he likes uou then
Milroy Borden: I've had almost all of the canine bodily fluids squirted on me.
Milroy Borden: I just need dog semen and I'll be complete.
MrBrown: fulfilled cpmplete uou mean?
Milroy Borden: Yes. I've had piss in my hair. Ear wax. Shit of course. Blood. Just semen now.
Milroy Borden: And pus.
MrBrown: 9 am here now
Milroy Borden: It's 11:56 pm here.
Milroy Borden: In Hellvada.
Milroy Borden: I've been chatting with you for almost 2 hours. I was about to leave when you contacted me.
MrBrown: im straight dude
MrBrown: for the record ahain
Milroy Borden: I ain't no faggot!
Milroy Borden: But then again, I used to hate asparagus and I like it now.
Milroy Borden: Solong, nigga. I gots to go.
MrBrown: cool duderina
MrBrown: ah fick
Milroy Borden: >Goodnightiesisieisiesies!
[COLOR=Red][B][I]The End. [/I][/B][/COLOR]
My brand new 2011 halloween comp: