The Mormons are stealing souls from other religions!
They tried doing it to Gandhi, but he was already reincarnated! And Mitt Romney supposedly has a hand in it...
http://huffingtonpost.com/2012/02/24/mormon-proxy-baptism-mahatma-gandhi_n_1299676.html
"They sold you hippies grunge, hip hop, now liberty activism."
NOT THIS AGAIN.
also, I prefer this website. it attempts to turn all mormons gay posthumously
http://alldeadmormonsarenowgay.com/
“if you want to be a bird,” you said once, “with colorful plumage and buoyant trills, you must also be ready for hollow bones."
http://alldeadmormonsarenowgay.com/
You know Mitt Romney must now the gayest human on earth.
And I helped!
"A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism." -Carl Sagan
"Am I cruel? Probably. Is she an idiot? Yes." -jane s.
El. Oh. El. Literally.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
*evil laugh*
Man is the cruelest animal.
A baptism for a dead person doesn't have any effect, it's the same as praying for people who are dead; it makes no difference.
The principle of it is messed up though.
Man is the cruelest animal.
I got news for you.
A baptism for a living person doesn't have any effect either.
This is why we can't have nice things.
But how do you KNOW?
I'm baptised, just in case.
I'm baptised, just in case.
Me too, but mine was in a street alley, at night, (kind of) without my permission, by a complete stranger so I'm not sure if it counted. But it was behind a church by somebody who worked there, or lived there, or hung out there a lot, or something. And I never read the bible she gave me. In fact, I left it in somebody's car and never saw it again.
That's how christians can really save people. Giving them surprise baptisms.
Depending on the religion and the laws of the land, some would consider that attempted drowning.
What if you're not baptized in the right religion? There's a lotta sacraments you gotta partake in to bu sure. Like, have you made a sacrifice of a burning bull to Zarathustra lately? Or a rooster to Asclepius? Busy business covering all the bases.
This is why we can't have nice things.
Brb.
Doing all that stuff.
My baptism was a huge surprise to me. I saw the video footage.
Strangling a virgin for Kali-ma is tricky. Luck with that.
M! Reminds me. I have to crawl naked and blooded through the moonlight tonight so that I can join the rest of the Covenant in the swamps to sing and beat my breast in madness for Cthulhu.
Badness when I forget to do that.
This is why we can't have nice things.
I got baptized, but it didn't take.
"A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism." -Carl Sagan
"Am I cruel? Probably. Is she an idiot? Yes." -jane s.
I got news for you.
A baptism for a living person doesn't have any effect either.
It can have an affect. You may not be "saved" but you may get baptised and you're dripping wet so your feet are slippery so you fall on a tile floor and a tooth chips out and you fall in love with the dentist who fixes it.
All I'm saying is there is probably not anything that a living person can do that will change anything for a dead person.
Man is the cruelest animal.
let's try again. I've got some water.
“if you want to be a bird,” you said once, “with colorful plumage and buoyant trills, you must also be ready for hollow bones."
Probably.
"A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism." -Carl Sagan
"Am I cruel? Probably. Is she an idiot? Yes." -jane s.
All I'm saying is there is probably not anything that a living person can do that will change anything for a dead person.
I guess that depends on how cremated the dead person is and what you are thinking of changing.
Not every baptism entails a full dunking. I think that's how Evangelicals or Protestants or whatever they are do it. I was born into/brought up in the Catholic Church, so I had my head sprinkled when I was probably no more than a couple months old.
In the Orthodox Church, the baby is dunked three times and the priest covers his/her nose and mouth. I'm surprised death cases are so rare.
It's the same for Protestants. Not that I remember it or anything... but I'm pretty sure none of my christening pictures showed the aftermath of being drenched.
Mine was done at a baptist church when I was ten, and I was dunked.
"A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism." -Carl Sagan
"Am I cruel? Probably. Is she an idiot? Yes." -jane s.
I was an infant and the catholics just spritzed me.
“if you want to be a bird,” you said once, “with colorful plumage and buoyant trills, you must also be ready for hollow bones."
If dunked before a certain age, babies still have the natural reflex to hold their breath. That's why they were able to take that picture of the Nirvana baby. They've done like actual tests about it. I don't know when it stops, though. It's a hold over from being in the womb.
Now that I think of it, I know more about various baptism rites than I'd thought. It tends to vary by when a particular sect broke-off from orthodoxy.
- Roman Catholics sprinkle babies.
- Lutherans (The Original Protest-Ants!) sprinkle babies. From them came Calvinists (thus Presbyterians!) who sprinkle babies. Methodists come from an attempt in the 18th century to bring back Calvinism; nevertheless, baptismal choice differs throughout their many many variations.
- Anabaptists (1525) say "WTF Babiez can;t make teh confession of faith! This is so bullshit. We're outie!" From them eventually spring the Puritans who, in time, become Massholes. From the Anabaptists came the Baptists (oddly enough).
- King Henry VIII (I am) says FU to Pope JohnPaulNegativeXXVI - "Oi! I don't need no Intermediary to God, you tosser!" and founds the CofE. Liza Gloriana reiterates.
This is why we can't have nice things.
I thought you had to pull someone's beating heart out of their chest. Then, lower the person into lava while the heart spontaneously bursts into flames.
You also believe in a crystal alien skull, don't you?
This is why we can't have nice things.
The thing that strikes me as the most messed up about all of this is- if one is going to devote their time to helping humanity, wouldn't it be better to focus on those alive and suffering?
I guess mormons would go about that in an oddball doesn't really help way anyhow, so maybe it is better that they get all distracted with the deceased instead after all... at least there won't be too much harm inflicted on those.
"A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism." -Carl Sagan
"Am I cruel? Probably. Is she an idiot? Yes." -jane s.
I actually missed that one... I was Shia'd out.
I ... was kinda hoping you could tell me how it went.
This is why we can't have nice things.
Now do they do that for people like Hitler and John Wayne Gacey?
Are souls even real?