Two Days In Paris VS The Last Four Months Of My Life

[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042344]Great question. Going into it I thought it would be the same except no Ethan Hawke. It's so much different. It's more like ANNIE HALL except that Woody Allen's character is way more foul-mouthed and straight-to-the-point in his sarcastic wit and not so focusing on being depressed and death and being jewish all the time, although he is afraid of terrorist attack and biological warfare and germs and food with eyes still in it and the annie hall character is not a prude who needs to smoke pot to get in the mood to have sex and in annie hall she is scared of the crabs that fall out of the pot. In this film the guy would be the scared one of the crabs. She would just stomp on them and then masturbate perhaps. I'm telling you, this is a very distinct look at my life right now. Julie Delpy IS the older nympho chick. The way she acts. The sluttishness, etc. It's all right there on the big screen... even her crazy mood swings and how she thinks she is never wrong and I'm pretty much like Adam Goldberg except that I'm not jewish and I don't have a beard and I don't have quite as many tattoos, but I've done many of the things and said many of the things he says on a constant, most regular basis. The SUNSET/SUNRISE movies were more low key and subtle. Linklater's style. This movie is more in your face and i laughed hysterically, out loud even, at some of the parts, I really can't think of any weak parts except that one scene rang false a bit, but the majority of it was fucking hysterical, especially for me, because it mirrored my life over the past few months so exactly, although I think anyone can see the humor in it and it's really an "original" take, in film anyways, on romance, for sure...[/QUOTE]

IIf done well, I always like 'people just talking for a day' movies. The synopsis just gave the vibe like as if Delphy didn't get some points across in SUNSET/SUNRISE and suddenly wanted to do her own take on the whole thing. I just checked out the trailer and am actually interested in seeing this. Having had a french ladyfriend, certain things made me smirk.

Come to think of it, that was also the case in SUNSET/SUNRISE. Anyways.

[QUOTE=Spike;1042382]I am TYPING IN ALL CAPS. WHAT I SAY IS EXTRA SUPER IMPORTANT, AND ALSO FACTUALLY CORRECT.[/QUOTE]

Actually I type in caps sometimes because of all the people around here who say they can't read the words that I post. I oftentimes imagine this place is full of near-sighted geriatrics and so I am doing my part to help, community service even, by making the cult into big letters like those special books for senior citizens that need a magnifying glass to read...

[img]http://www.inaspawprints.com/images/Laurelatwork.jpg[/img]: THAT DARNED BROCK MAKES ME SO ANGRY I DON'T KNOW WHAT! ETHEL! BRING ME MY THESAURUS/DICTIONARY SO I CAN FIGURE OUT WHAT HE JUST SAID!

[QUOTE=monkeywright;1042389]Did you learn that skill in county?:)[/QUOTE]

I actually learned that in the car business, bigtime...

[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042395]
[img]http://www.inaspawprints.com/images/Laurelatwork.jpg[/img]: THAT DARNED BROCK MAKES ME SO ANGRY I DON'T KNOW WHAT! ETHEL! BRING ME MY THESAURUS/DICTIONARY SO I CAN FIGURE OUT WHAT HE JUST SAID![/QUOTE]

And finally Brock posts a pic of older nympho chick...:hitit:

Brock you should start threads more often. I'll post my review of the movie here. Though I hardly think that it'll be as relatable for me as it was for you, I enjoy watching Goldberg ever since The Salton Sea and especially since his role in Entourage.

When I read the above post, first I thought JT had editted it from an earlier post to satirize Brock and paint him as an idiot. I scrolled up then and realised it was an actual Brock post. That made me laugh.

[QUOTE=Spike;1042370]Has anyone seen One Night in Paris?[/QUOTE]

Is that VENDREDI SOIR's english title?

[QUOTE]\\synopsis:

Having packed up her possessions to move in with her lover, Laure is more unsettled than she appears. Needing to get out and have a change of scenery, she jumps in her car to go to have dinner with friends--only to become stuck in a terrible traffic jam. Laure completely forgot about the mass transit strike that has thrown the city into chaos. But Laure feels good in her car, the only place she has for herself right now. As she takes in the sights and sounds around her--the blare of horns and arguments, the shimmer of lights and camaraderie--Laure notices a calm and self-assured stranger, Jean, approach her car. Soon thereafter, she opens her car door door to the man who--that night--will change her life[/QUOTE]

Damn fine film.

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Thread IMPROVED.

[QUOTE=corellion;1042384]Couple of pointers, no biggie. I'm not British, thank you. I did say Phil, as in Xec8, should be the new Brock Landers. There's a whole level of sci-fi-nerd-geek-etc irony going on there that I'm sure a ranger such as yourself wouldn't bother with, what with your older nympho chick and everything. As for Barca Boy not being you, well you know, thank fuck. I also read that post as a joke. If I said you could suck my ten-thousand mile member, you're not going to go and assume I actually believe my penis is ten-thousand miles long, are you? And newbies are all fine, I like them. You don't suck for no reason, and everyone offers reasons, here, I'll break it down Brock Style.

Brock's last ten "awesomest ever!" posts: FUCK BARCABOY, NOT ALONE CORELLION ALSO CONFUSED, FUCK BARCABOY, FUCK CORELLION AND BARCABOY, FUCK CORELLION AND BARCABOY, FUCK CORELLION AND VENDETTA, OLDER NYMPHO CHICK FUCKED MY ASS WITH A HAMSTER... etc.

As for the stereotypes;
Fat, moronic, infantile - Fat as in America, and within America, Texas's highest wordly obesity rates? Moronic as in OLDER NYMPHO CHICK FUCKING ME, NO FRIENDS TO TELL ABOUT IT HELLO INTERNET PEOPLE, and infantile as in a list of adjectives? Shit yeah, you nailed it Brock. Like your OLDER NYMPHO CHICK. You nailed it good.

At least my posts manage to vary beyond that pubescant placenta of getting some. You're like 50 and you sell cars, you're bald and if your chick is older than you and still a nympho I'd suggest taking her to a doctor. Maybe once in a bluemoon you come out with something in pargraphs, something well worth reading, but half the time as Monkeywright said, it's just you flicking shit and spittle on the walls, and it's the swastika armband of taking the moral highground, as in, don't fucking try it. Also, loving these sentences, pure BROCK.

I see, so it's not what's really there, it's what you see. Well I see an old bald guy whinging [B]in depth [/B]on the internet banging an older, possibly also bald, chick.[/QUOTE]

I am glad that it was I who actually spurred you on towards new growth in the realm of intellectualism. You need to work on your insults a little though. If you go to far to the extreme, it makes it seem like you are trying to hard. By saying that I am really old and bald and have no friends and stuff, you are focusing too much on the obvious stuff. Of course I am old compared to you. Yes, I do shave my head. yes, I admittedly have no friends. That doesn't make me stupid. That just means I am different than you. If having friends and hair and youth means being like you, then I never want to find the fountain of youthful hairyness friendship. Friends are almost as worthless as hair. Friends are just so you feel like you are not alone. Friends are for people who need other people to support them and make them feel good about their own shitty existence. The only time anyone really needs friends is when they can't do something by themselves. Friendship is all about codependence. If you cling to having friends as being the right way to live, then fine, but I can still enjoy experiences without having someone there to help me remember it. I don't necessarily think that just because everybody is doing something that I need to do it to. I am not a conformist in the traditional sense of the word. I know you are trying to insult me, but I think it is great that you are trying to explain your thoughts in a post for once instead of just posting nothingness like usual. It gives you a whole new depth in my eyes. Xec8 is not a bad looking guy and he seems sort of interesting in a European better-than-thou sort of way, although I don’t get his whole wikipedia posting thing where he just fills posts with stuff from other websites, which seems to be a very popular trend around here, as is evident by the new inclusion of a you tube discussion forum. I even like you tube, so whatever. I think anything that illustrates a point is worthwhile to post. I don’t think I’ve ever taken a moral high ground. I just like to think I am better than everybody else. You are no different. None of you. Otherwise we wouldn’t be having this conversation right now. Insults only work well when you base them on reality. Reality is perception, but much like the hamster reference, that came from nowhere, it makes no sense when it comes to me and therefore is not funny. I like funny insults as much as the next guy, but only when they are full of wit…

[QUOTE=monkeywright;1042398]And finally Brock posts a pic of older nympho chick...:hitit:[/QUOTE]

Come on dude, your sense of humor mirror's an old man telling knock-knock jokes. That's not how comedy works. You have to be more subversive, not like OH MY GOD! OLD LADY! NYMPHO CHICK! HA HA! your humor will be much funnier once you stop telling fart jokes, I assure you... unless of course you are talking to the simple indigineous peoples that inhabit the plains of ths here cult...

In other words you old and wrong and you know you can't come-back to my WHIPPING post of insult-fury? Like you're some kind of insult God. The best you could come up with were fat and infantile! They're the first two in the book! You're an amateur Brock, a rectum nibbling amateur.

[QUOTE=corellion;1042401]When I read the above post, first I thought JT had editted it from an earlier post to satirize Brock and paint him as an idiot. I scrolled up then and realised it was an actual Brock post. That made me laugh.[/QUOTE]

because you are one of the simple indigineous peoples that laugh at anything no matter how silly it may be... this whole place has turned into threads and posts about america's funniest home videos. I don't know which one of you is the head idiot Bob Saget, but I do know that the majority of you are the audience of simpletons that laughs every time a kitten leaps on someone's head while their kid hits them in the balls with a whiffle ball bat...

[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042406] I just like to think I am better than everybody else. You are no different. None of you. Otherwise we wouldn’t be having this conversation right now. [/QUOTE]

Actually, this, like most of your other arguments, is chock full of narcissistic circular logic. We don't think we're better than you. You refuse to accept that you're on the same level as us, and you are. Deal with it.

blah blah blah SEX WITH BLACK PEOPLE

[QUOTE=monkeywright;1042411]We don't think we're better than you.[/QUOTE]I do, actually.

[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042407]Come on dude, your sense of humor mirror's an old man telling knock-knock jokes. That's not how comedy works. You have to be more subversive, not like OH MY GOD! OLD LADY! NYMPHO CHICK! HA HA! your humor will be much funnier once you stop telling fart jokes, I assure you... unless of course you are talking to the simple indigineous peoples that inhabit the plains of ths here cult...[/QUOTE]

Seriously? So if had just posted in all caps and with improper grammar it would have been funny? Even though the picture is of a lady I wouldn't fuck with your dick, yet I added the "I'd hit it" smiley for a subversive twist? I'm done with you.

[QUOTE=corellion;1042408]In other words you old and wrong and you know you can't come-back to my WHIPPING post of insult-fury? Like you're some kind of insult God. The best you could come up with were fat and infantile! They're the first two in the book! You're an amateur Brock, a rectum nibbling amateur.[/QUOTE]

Your post is full of insults based on stuff that doesn't relate to me. You might as well say I am a turtle. That's how far off-base you are, therefore I don't feel the need to have a comeback against something that isn't even really insulting. You say I'm 50 and I am not even close. You say I am bald and I talk incessantly how I shave my head by choice and how I am not a real bald and actually do have hair which right now is getting long and I need to shave it off again. You try and make the older nympho chick into a bad thing like being older and a nympho are bad things. Your humor is based on the fact that you apparently think being a nympho is a bad thing, and that you don't like people who are older and wiser than you. I don't play videogames like you either, so that probably means I am some kind of jerk. You probably love Panic! At The Disco too. Your whole post reeks of adolescent angst misdirected, and therefore, it doesn't matter what I say, I can't make it improved or any better and you won't listen to the sound of reason or logic or real humor anyway. You might as well be british. You act like one of them. Americans don't use the word NIBBLING unless they are homosexual in some way, which would explain your fascination with penises and me...

[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042410]because you are one of the simple indigineous peoples that laugh at anything no matter how silly it may be... this whole place has turned into threads and posts about america's funniest home videos. I don't know which one of you is the head idiot Bob Saget, but I do know that the majority of you are the audience of simpletons that laughs every time a kitten leaps on someone's head while their kid hits them in the balls with a whiffle ball bat...[/QUOTE]

What the fuck is indigineous?
Also, kitten + kid combo attack = hilarious.

[QUOTE=monkeywright;1042414]Seriously? So if had just posted in all caps and with improper grammar it would have been funny? Even though the picture is of a lady I wouldn't fuck with your dick, yet I added the "I'd hit it" smiley for a subversive twist? I'm done with you.[/QUOTE]

If you have to add a smiley to make it funny, then it isn't funny. Real humorists don't laugh at their own jokes. Laughing at your own joke means it isn't even funny to begin with. When you have to tell people it's funny, then it isn't humor either. I only use smileys when I am trying to appear softer than I really am, like a wolf with a sheep mask on...

[QUOTE=monkeywright;1042411]Actually, this, like most of your other arguments, is chock full of narcissistic circular logic. We don't think we're better than you. You refuse to accept that you're on the same level as us, and you are. Deal with it.[/QUOTE]

Why do you think that nascissism is such a bad thing? How do you even know I am a narcissist? I mean, I as hot and intelligent and amazing as I am, I have always had an extremely low self-esteem and sarcasm is the way I talk. I'm just incredibly misunderstood by the vast majority of people once I open my mouth. People want to be right about how they judge me to be and then when I am not that thing they think I am, they get all mad and upset... all logic is circular... life is a cycle... sex is everything... etc...

[QUOTE=Spike;1042412]blah blah blah SEX WITH BLACK PEOPLE[/QUOTE]

god, you're almost as much of an attention whore as me...

Whatever, turtle.

[QUOTE=corellion;1042423]Whatever, turtle.[/QUOTE]

If you really want to make a long-lasting impression, you can't just lie down and give up everytime you get flustered. Self-deprecation has it's place in the world of comedy too. I've mastered the concept myself and that is why I fucking rule...

[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042418]If you have to add a smiley to make it funny, then it isn't funny. Real humorists don't laugh at their own jokes. Laughing at your own joke means it isn't even funny to begin with. When you have to tell people it's funny, then it isn't humor either. I only use smileys when I am trying to appear softer than I really am, like a wolf with a sheep mask on...[/QUOTE]

Yes, but it wasn't a smiley in the smiley sense. It was someone saying "I'd hit it" there's the joke. Not a knee slapper, but then what can be as funny as half a page of "I am the steel-hearted misunderstood poet warrior soul-breaking American icon hero to millions adored by all worshipped by none loved and hated and misunderstood and friendless by choice and one of two people who actually understands jazz every woman's dream and nightmare wrapped in a sheepskin box with tiger stripes because I'm a tiger underneath."

But seriously, I'm done with you until your next intelligent and intelligible post.

[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042424]If you really want to make a long-lasting impression, you can't just lie down and give up everytime you get flustered. Self-deprecation has it's place in the world of comedy too. I've mastered the concept myself and that is why I fucking rule...[/QUOTE]

You realize everyone's reading this thread and laughing at you?
It's not even an injoke, it's just an outjoke, and you're out. You're blind to the masterly levels of lingual wizardry about you. You lose Brock. Game Over.

[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042420]Why do you think that nascissism is such a bad thing? How do you even know I am a narcissist? I mean, I as hot and intelligent and amazing as I am, I have always had an extremely low self-esteem and sarcasm is the way I talk. I'm just incredibly misunderstood by the vast majority of people once I open my mouth. People want to be right about how they judge me to be and then when I am not that thing they think I am, they get all mad and upset... all logic is circular... life is a cycle... sex is everything... etc...[/QUOTE]

Sorry, almost missed this one. Didn't say narcissism was a bad thing, I'm pointing out that your method of reasoning is deeply flawed, even though you attempt to use self deprecation as an escape hatch at the end of your sentence.

You think you're right because you think you're right. It doesn't work that way. An ex-marine should know better.

[QUOTE=monkeywright;1042426]I am the steel-hearted misunderstood poet warrior soul-breaking American icon hero to millions adored by all worshipped by none loved and hated and misunderstood and friendless by choice and one of two people who actually understands jazz every woman's dream and nightmare wrapped in a sheepskin box with tiger stripes because I'm a tiger underneath.[/QUOTE]

See... that's what I'm talking about! Deprecation and humor go together like jewish people and s'mores! I feel very proud at this moment that I have helped you garner a better understanding of what humor is all about. Without me and my grandiose life, this place would be just like every other discussion board on the internet. I made this place what it is today just by merely existing. Like me or not, agree with me or no, that's a fact and you know it even though you will never, ever, ever admit it. That's okay by me. I don't even want you to admit it. That would cheapen the thrill in some way for me...

[QUOTE=corellion;1042427]You realize everyone's reading this thread and laughing at you?
It's not even an injoke, it's just an outjoke, and you're out. You're blind to the masterly levels of lingual wizardry about you. You lose Brock. Game Over.[/QUOTE]

Speak for yourself Corr. Don't presume too much about what everyone thinks please.

[QUOTE=corellion;1042427]You realize everyone's reading this thread and laughing at you?
It's not even an injoke, it's just an outjoke, and you're out. You're blind to the masterly levels of lingual wizardry about you. You lose Brock. Game Over.[/QUOTE]

I have no problem with people laughing at me, especially you people. You people, laughing at me, is like a retard laughing at a normal person. My normality, or lack thereof, is what makes you laugh. I'm obviously not retarded enough to fit in with most people here. That's what I love about this place. All the retards. All the little people. Without the little people, I couldn't even exist. The devil doesn't exist to those who don't believe in him... and you people obviously believe in The Brock and that's cool by me. I am not so delicate that I think people really hate me. I think they just love to hate me because it makes them feel better about themselves when they realize I am so far above them in the first place. I may indeed be like everyone else here, no smarter or no more dumber, but if I just agreed to agree all the time, then this place wouldn't even be worth coming to. i can agree with mediocrity anywhere...

[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042431]See... that's what I'm talking about![/QUOTE]
:yup:
[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042431]Deprecation and humor go together like jewish people and s'mores! [/QUOTE]
:love:
[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042431]I feel very proud at this moment that I have helped you garner a better understanding of what humor is all about. [/QUOTE]
:hail:
[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042431]Without me and my grandiose life, this place would be just like every other discussion board on the internet. [/QUOTE]
:hail: :hail: :hail:
[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042431]I made this place what it is today just by merely existing.[/QUOTE]
:hail: :yup: :hail: :yup: :hail:
[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042431]Like me or not, agree with me or no, that's a fact and you know it even though you will never, ever, ever admit it. [/QUOTE]
:love: :32: :love: :32:
[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042431]That's okay by me.[/QUOTE]
:umbrella:
[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042431]I don't even want you to admit it. That would cheapen the thrill in some way for me...[/QUOTE]
:dunce:
[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042431]That would cheapen the thrill in some way for me...[/QUOTE]

:bryce:

Spike, I take it you weren't serious about the movie title you mentioned earlier? Curious which film it is if.. if it's a film.

[QUOTE=monkeywright;1042429]Sorry, almost missed this one. Didn't say narcissism was a bad thing, I'm pointing out that your method of reasoning is deeply flawed, even though you attempt to use self deprecation as an escape hatch at the end of your sentence.

You think you're right because you think you're right. It doesn't work that way. An ex-marine should know better.[/QUOTE]

You say an ex-marine should know better, but I am not an ex-marine, I am a retired marine. I still think a lot like one, and being a marine is a lifelong decision. The difference between me now and me when I was in the marines, is that I had people that were inferior to me as my acting superiors giving me orders that I had to blindly follow or end up in the brig. The life of a soldier is a life full of doing things that don't make sense and doing things that aren't necessarily right. You don't need to have a brain to be a soldier, in fact, i argue that the best marines are the ones with no brains at all. They will blindly die for some semblance of what they think is patriotism. Like people who believe in god for no reason other than they believe. I became a bit disillusioned about the government many years ago, but I'mstill glad I made a decision to serve my country and posibly die for my flag. I don't think I was more of a patriot than I am now back then. I just didn't really understand patriotism back then like i do now. i question authority and don't always do as I'm told. That's part of growing up. I still admire those who blindly go forth and die because of it. i still love the marines and act like I am one in many regards, but that was also a coming of age experience for me. I learned a lot and moved on...

[QUOTE=Mr. Brown;1042439]Spike, I take it you weren't serious about the movie title you mentioned earlier? Curious which film it is if.. if it's a film.[/QUOTE]

[URL=http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0412260/]Its the Paris Hilton sex one.[/URL]

[QUOTE=Mr. Brown;1042439]Spike, I take it you weren't serious about the movie title you mentioned earlier? Curious which film it is if.. if it's a film.[/QUOTE]

Is this a scenario where you want someone's take on it rather that a wiki link again? It's Paris Hilton's sex tape. 3 out of 5 stars.

[QUOTE=Jill's Tit;1042436]:yup:

:love:

:hail:

:hail: :hail: :hail:

:hail: :yup: :hail: :yup: :hail:

:love: :32: :love: :32:

:umbrella:

:dunce:

:bryce:[/QUOTE]

you do realize that you just spent a lot of time making a post all about me, right? That's the effect I am talking about. You love me so much because you hate me so much. It's like some sort of Catch-22. You can't get enough of me because you can't get enough of me. I may be dumb, but I argue that someone who puts so much effort into explaining why I am dumb is probably dumbger than me even. It's like those people always bad-mouthing the president. As much as I dislike the president sometimes, or at least the things he does, I dislike those people that are always putting him down even more... because they too really love him and without him they wouldn't have anything to talk about...

I win.

[QUOTE=Smartazboy;1042442][URL=http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0412260/]Its the Paris Hilton sex one.[/URL][/QUOTE]

Ah fuck. There I went and thought it was a fucking French film.

[QUOTE=bigshrimpn;1042443]Is this a scenario where you want someone's take on it rather that a wiki link again? It's Paris Hilton's sex tape. 3 out of 5 stars.[/QUOTE]

Dude.

[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042444] I may be dumb, but I argue that someone who puts so much effort into explaining why I am dumb is probably dumber than me even.[/QUOTE]

** nods head in agreement **

[QUOTE=Smartazboy;1042445]I win.[/QUOTE]

Win? Win at what?

[QUOTE=Brock Landers;1042444]you do realize that you just spent a lot of time making a post all about me, right? That's the effect I am talking about. You love me so much because you hate me so much. It's like some sort of Catch-22. You can't get enough of me because you can't get enough of me. I may be dumb, but I argue that someone who puts so much effort into explaining why I am dumb is probably dumbger than me even. It's like those people always bad-mouthing the president. As much as I dislike the president sometimes, or at least the things he does, I dislike those people that are always putting him down even more... because they too really love him and without him they wouldn't have anything to talk about...[/QUOTE]

:bryce:

Dude the smiley stuff's gotta stop. Seriously.

[QUOTE=Mr. Brown;1042449]Win? Win at what?[/QUOTE]

Um, not at life, thats for sure.

I meant I beat Shrimpn at explaining the Paris movie.

[QUOTE=Smartazboy;1042459]Um, not at life, thats for sure.

I meant I beat Shrimpn at explaining the Paris movie.[/QUOTE]

Ah fuck you went with the eppileptic avatar.

[QUOTE=Mr. Brown;1042457]Dude the smiley stuff's gotta stop. Seriously.[/QUOTE]

the second shut up bitch made me laugh out loud though.

I'm gonna visit Paris again soon I think.

I was going to suggest that people just CHILL and go rent the film, but its not out on dvd just yet. Still making the theater rounds.

[QUOTE=Mr. Brown;1042457]Dude the smiley stuff's gotta stop. Seriously.[/QUOTE]

It's the only way I feel I can truly respond to him anymore. What, you're gonna call [I]me [/I]annoying?

[QUOTE=Jill's Tit;1042468]It's the only way I feel I can truly respond to him anymore. What, you're gonna call [I]me [/I]annoying?[/QUOTE]

I don't like smileys Mr. Tit.

I don't like pretentious dicks, Mr. Brown.

[QUOTE=Mr. Brown;1042470]I don't like smileys Mr. Tit.[/QUOTE]

why not? be sure to do it in the same breath where you explain why you LIKE film.