100+ Films I Hate: With A Vengeance...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:40

#51

karbunkle

From: The Other Side of the Wind

Joined: 10/27/2003

by the way, you forgot to put 'sleepers' on your list
that is the end all be all of suckiest sucking movies ever made

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:42

#52

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=Prensa Taladradora]bad santa=bad movie

I wish I never watched it[/QUOTE]

yeah, you're the reason i will never rent that one, even though the video store guy is all DUDE, BAD SANTA IS LIKE BAD-ASS, AND NOW THEYHAVE THE NEW VERSION WHICH HAS EXTRA SHIT AND IT'S BAD"DER" SANTA! LIKE THE VIDEO COVER HAS A "DER" SPRAYPAINTED ON...

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The mind is the limit. I am going to be the best personal trainer to ever exist on this earth. I am going to inspire, motivate, and change lives. I have that power. There is not a doubt in my mind that I can make you have an orgasm just from the power of my mind via the internet. I'm a giver like that. I can heal you. I can make you whole. That's Brock. That's what I do. Moving on...

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:43

#53

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=karbunkle]by the way, you forgot to put 'sleepers' on your list
that is the end all be all of suckiest sucking movies ever made[/QUOTE]

Fuck you, I liked Sleepers and I'll tell you why I liked it... because it had The Count of Monte Cristo as part of the plot and Kevin Bacon as a child molester. Those two reason make it a decent enough film to me...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:45

#54

karbunkle

From: The Other Side of the Wind

Joined: 10/27/2003

[QUOTE=Brock Landers]I never say that movie either, but Dana Carvey hasn't been good for years, I can't imagine that one was any good, I just remember some stupid turtlehead character he kept showing trailers of during his promotional talk show circuit...[/QUOTE]
its probably his best movie he'll ever make because he gets to play different charcters all through out
itll be his "austin powers" or the white version of the klumps
[IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v204/karbunkle/carvey.jpg[/IMG]

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:45

#55

Prensa Taladradora

From: piss off

Joined: 01/06/2004

there's so many good billy bob movies you could watch instead of shattering any illusions you might have about him. When people do lame shit for money it always makes me wonder why?

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:46

#56

karbunkle

From: The Other Side of the Wind

Joined: 10/27/2003

[QUOTE=Brock Landers]Fuck you, I liked Sleepers and I'll tell you why I liked it... because it had The Count of Monte Cristo as part of the plot and Kevin Bacon as a child molester. Those two reason make it a decent enough film to me...[/QUOTE]
Bah ! based soley on your liking this one film i now know you know nothing about what your talking about movie-wise

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:47

#57

Prensa Taladradora

From: piss off

Joined: 01/06/2004

undercover brother...don't watch it

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:51

#58

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=Prensa Taladradora]there's so many good billy bob movies you could watch instead of shattering any illusions you might have about him. When people do lame shit for money it always makes me wonder why?[/QUOTE]

I can think of only two good billy bob films... SLING BLADE and A SIMPLE PLAN... that's it... I stillremember that piece of shit I saw him in with what's his face bland boy... PUSHING TIN... godawful crap...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:52

#59

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=karbunkle]Bah ! based soley on your liking this one film i now know you know nothing about what your talking about movie-wise[/QUOTE]

What can I say... I'm a big fan of sodomy in film...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:53

#60

karbunkle

From: The Other Side of the Wind

Joined: 10/27/2003

he was pretty good in the two minutes he was in the apostle

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:55

#61

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=Prensa Taladradora]undercover brother...don't watch it[/QUOTE]

ya know, I like Eddie Griffin as a comedian, but as a rule, his films usually suck... everyone that mightbe good, usually turns out to suck... THE NEW GUY... UNDERCOVER BROTHER... THE MOD SQUAD... HOUSE PARTY 3... DOUBLE TAKE... this remindsme, some new ghetto black movie I heard on the radio is coming out with Damon Wayans... guarantee it will suck...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:56

#62

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=karbunkle]he was pretty good in the two minutes he was in the apostle[/QUOTE]

oh he's fine in bit parts, I was talking starring roles... I mean, Billy Bob Thornton was AWESOME in Jim Jarmusch's DEAD MAN where he wants to sodomize Johnny Depp because Depp has such purty hair...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 15:57

#63

karbunkle

From: The Other Side of the Wind

Joined: 10/27/2003

[QUOTE=Brock Landers]What can I say... I'm a big fan of sodomy in film...[/QUOTE]
sodomy in films is great , i dunno i just hated that one flick for whatever reason i liked toys , weird
[img]http://www.moviemaker.com/issues/32/images/deliverance.jpg[/img]

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:01

#64

Prensa Taladradora

From: piss off

Joined: 01/06/2004

I like The Man Who Wasn't There and I just saw one called Levity that was cool, and he was in Dead Man in a dress!

*edit never mind that was iggy pop...but wasn't billy bob there too?

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:03

#65

Prensa Taladradora

From: piss off

Joined: 01/06/2004

[QUOTE=Brock Landers]ya know, I like Eddie Griffin as a comedian, but as a rule, his films usually suck... everyone that mightbe good, usually turns out to suck... THE NEW GUY... UNDERCOVER BROTHER... THE MOD SQUAD... HOUSE PARTY 3... DOUBLE TAKE... this remindsme, some new ghetto black movie I heard on the radio is coming out with Damon Wayans... guarantee it will suck...[/QUOTE]

white chicks. don't watch it. it looks so bad so bad so baaaad..

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:06

#66

Death to the De...

From: Genhinnom, The Valley of Gehen

Joined: 07/24/2004

[QUOTE=Brock Landers]What can I say... I'm a big fan of sodomy in film...[/QUOTE]
Sodomy
You must think it very odd of me
That I enjoy the act of sodomy
You might call the wrath of God on me
But if you tried it then you might agree
That you enjoy the act of sodomy

Don't worry if you feel ashamed, it's been around for years
Thousands more than can be named are interested in rears
Don't worry about Hell, no harm will come to your soul
We're not all pentacostal, but everybody's got an arsehole

Let me tell you 'bout sodomy
You must think it very odd of me
That I enjoy the act of sodomy
You might call the wrath of God on me
But if you tried it then you might agree
That you enjoy the act of sodomy

It might just improve your sex, it's a hard act to follow
A fact that fundamentalists find difficult to swallow
So join me as I sing of an activity that's fun
Or burn up your ring
And try it front to bum
Bum bum
Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum

Sodomy
You must think it very odd of me
That I enjoy the act of sodomy
You might call the wrath of God on me
But if you tried it then you might agree
That you enjoy the act of sodomy

Sodomy!!

(performed in 'Meet the Feebles' directed by Peter Jackson)

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:09

#67

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=Prensa Taladradora]I like The Man Who Wasn't There and I just saw one called Levity that was cool, and he was in Dead Man in a dress!

*edit never mind that was iggy pop...but wasn't billy bob there too?[/QUOTE]

I'll tell ya something... I skipped those two Billy Bob flicks because I know that one was Coen Bros., but the cast was lost on me... I am tired of Frances McDormand... I am sick of that Sopranos guy... Bill Bob as a barber, what the fuck? Plus, it was black and white and that's way too pretentious for a new film, especially one with a bunch of typecast hollywood players who have been way overexposed... and Levity looked boring because he was all soft-spoken and emo and homeless looking with long hair and it seemed like it would suck because it's all about helping people and crying and stuff... at least that's my takeon those two films because I never saw them... and yeah, Iggy Pop wore the dress and read from the scriptures over the pot of beans and then Billy Bob wasarguin with that other dude like I DON'T CARE A-WHO SAW A-WHAT AND A-WHO A DID A-WHO and I CAIN'T DRINK WHISKEY LIKE I USETA COULD, MY GUTS ALL BUSTED DON'CHA KNOW and YOUR HAIR IS ALL SOFT AND PURTY and OUCH, YOU SHOT ME IN THE FOOT! that whole scene rocks...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:13

#68

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=Prensa Taladradora]white chicks. don't watch it. it looks so bad so bad so baaaad..[/QUOTE]

oh, that white chicks already came out a while back, I mean there is some new one, the commercial said lisa kudrow was in it and it was about hip hop or something... let me check my sack... yep... MARCI X... sounds like CB4 II...

I like some Wayans stuff, like I think he's making a Homey the Clown movie and I like that character and I like that movie, I'M GONNA GIT YOU SUCKA and MO' MONEY wasn't bad when it came out...

[img]http://www.filmsinreview.com/Images/marci_x.jpg[/img]

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:16

#69

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=Death to the Demoness EJ]Sodomy
You must think it very odd of me
That I enjoy the act of sodomy
You might call the wrath of God on me
But if you tried it then you might agree
That you enjoy the act of sodomy

Sodomy
You must think it very odd of me
That I enjoy the act of sodomy
You might call the wrath of God on me
But if you tried it then you might agree
That you enjoy the act of sodomy

Sodomy!!

(performed in 'Meet the Feebles' directed by Peter Jackson)[/QUOTE]

Everyone says Meet The Feebles is a good movie and I believe them but I don't wanna watch it because I hate puppet movies... I don't care how satirical or foulmouthed or funny they are/is... Peter Jackson is a big fat geek... yeah, he can direct okay and did the huge lord of the rings thing, but he's a big fat geek and he's always been a big fat geek ever since he made Bad Taste...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:19

#70

Death to the De...

From: Genhinnom, The Valley of Gehen

Joined: 07/24/2004

[QUOTE=Brock Landers]Everyone says Meet The Feebles is a good movie and I believe them but I don't wanna watch it because I hate puppet movies... I don't care how satirical or foulmouthed or funny they are/is... Peter Jackson is a big fat geek... yeah, he can direct okay and did the huge lord of the rings thing, but he's a big fat geek and he's always been a big fat geek ever since he made Bad Taste...[/QUOTE]
Ok, just forward it near to the end so you can see this song, it's hilarious and after all, you like sodomy in film... I have been looking for the OST but I have not found it.

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:25

#71

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=Death to the Demoness EJ]Ok, just forward it near to the end so you can see this song, it's hilarious and after all, you like sodomy in film... I have been looking for the OST but I have not found it.[/QUOTE]

You had me... and then you lost me... OST? What the hell is that? Is that like the OPP? Yeah you know me, I'm down with that...

I like sodomy in film, not particularly songs about sodomy in film, but hey, whatever.. like I said, that's just me, I like butter in my ass, lollipops in my mouth, and I'm sure Meet The Feeblesor Meet the Deedles or Meet the Parents or whateverthehell are all fine and dandy movies, but I am not about to watch them...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:29

#72

Death to the De...

From: Genhinnom, The Valley of Gehen

Joined: 07/24/2004

OST
Original Sound Track

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:34

#73

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=Death to the Demoness EJ]OST
Original Sound Track[/QUOTE]

I've watched over 10,000 movies in my lifetime. I've been paid to write about movies. I've interviewed Matthew McConaughey at a seafood restaurant. I've gotten a high five from Vincent D'Onofrio at a screening of Five Easy Pieces and talked to Vinnie Jones on the telephone long distance to England. All kinds of stuff... and never have I heard an original sound track called an OST. Learn something new every day, I guess...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:34

#74

SnowWhite

Joined: 01/01/2003

[QUOTE=Brock Landers]Dick van Dyke british? Wot? He's an american old-time tv icon...[/QUOTE]
I didn't phrase that very well: I meant Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and Mary Poppins being too English for you. I know he's American, he did the worst Cockney accent in the whole history of film. I don't think he even bothers about doing any form of an English accent in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang...

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:39

#75

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=SnowWhite]I didn't phrase that very well: I meant Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and Mary Poppins being too English for you. I know he's American, he did the worst Cockney accent in the whole history of film. I don't think he even bothers about doing any form of an English accent in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang...[/QUOTE]

British has nothing to do with it. I liked Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and I never thought of it as an english film... just a flying car secret cave film... Poppins I think of a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down and motherfuckin' bibbitybobbityboo, or is that Cinderella, anyway, when I think Dick van Dyke, I think Carol Burnett, I think Columbo, I think Michael Landon, I think that stupid show on PAX where he plays a crime-fighting geriatric physician. British ain't nothing to do with it... I forget, why are we talking about Dick van Dyke again?

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:41

#76

karbunkle

From: The Other Side of the Wind

Joined: 10/27/2003

[QUOTE=Brock Landers]... I forget, why are we talking about Dick van Dyke again?[/QUOTE]
because his name sounds like a transexual lesbian ?

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:48

#77

SnowWhite

Joined: 01/01/2003

I can't remember either...

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:49

#78

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=karbunkle]because his name sounds like a transexual lesbian ?[/QUOTE]

transexual lesbian movies.. BOYS DON'T CRY! Love that flick. Did I mention I metthe girl who plays Candace at my health club on wednesday evening? If not, there ya go. My favorite part is the roller skating to The Cars Just What I Needed scene and in the bar when Chloe Sevigny karaoke's Bluest Eyes In Texas and the part where heshe puts a giant dildo in his pants to make a bulge...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:52

#79

SnowWhite

Joined: 01/01/2003

Poor Chloe Sevigny, always getting/wanting the wrong guy in her movies.

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:55

#80

Death to the De...

From: Genhinnom, The Valley of Gehen

Joined: 07/24/2004

[QUOTE=SnowWhite]Poor Chloe Sevigny, always getting/wanting the wrong guy in her movies.[/QUOTE]
Did you see her in 'Gummo'? (dir. Harmony Korrine). Boy that movie scared the bejeezus out of me and it is a semi documentary.

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:55

#81

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=SnowWhite]I can't remember either...[/QUOTE]

I know why! because Dick van Dyke was in MUPPETS GO TO HOLLYWOOD with Christopher Reeve who was in DEATHTRAP with Michael Caine who was in QUILLS with Joaquin Phoenix who was in U-TURN with Billy Bob Thornton who was in DEAD MAN with Johnny Depp who was in DONNIE BRASCO with AL PACINO who was in THE RECRUIT with COLIN FARRELL who was in MINORITY REPORT with Tom Cruise who was in INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE with Brad Pitt who played Tyler Durden in FIGHT CLUB with a BIG FAT COCK and even though Brad Pitt is NOT Michael Pitt's Brother, they both have a penis or something?

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 16:56

#82

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=Death to the Demoness EJ]Did you see her in 'Gummo'? (dir. Harmony Korrine). Boy that movie scared the bejeezus out of me and it is a semi documentary.[/QUOTE]

Yeah, everyone says Gummo when you mention her. I always think of her as Patrick Bateman's secretary in American Psycho...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 17:27

#83

SnowWhite

Joined: 01/01/2003

I think of her as Jenny in Kids. You really are being shit on by getting told you've got HIV and then get raped, all in the same day.
I try to forget her in Boys Don't Cry. American Psycho I feel very sorry for her, or her character, Jean.

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 18:15

#84

Alexander

From: Holland

Joined: 02/16/2003

Maybe I missed it, but why isn't this work of shit on the list?
[IMG]http://images.rottentomatoes.com/images/movie/coverv/23/140423.jpg[/IMG]
"It's rare to find a movie that makes this little sense."

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"[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system."[/CENTER]

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 18:19

#85

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=Alexander]Maybe I missed it, but why isn't this work of shit on the list?
[IMG]http://images.rottentomatoes.com/images/movie/coverv/23/140423.jpg[/IMG]
"It's rare to find a movie that makes this little sense."[/QUOTE]

because the list is an afterthought... it's by no means complete, which is why I asked for your contributions. Thanks, by the way, Virus is a great contribution. Why is that lastline in quotes? Did you get it from someone else?

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 18:25

#86

Alexander

From: Holland

Joined: 02/16/2003

Yes, I ran into this quote browsing for the DVD case.. guess it sums it all up for me.

In a way, 'Master and Commander' could fit the list, proper budget, proper cast, proper director... tried it twice, woken twice by the climax sound fx.. what a waste of money, they could make a thousand crap movies with a budget like that and make them appeal to an even bigger audience!

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"[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system."[/CENTER]

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 18:26

#87

Brock Landers

From: Texas

Joined: 01/02/2003

[QUOTE=Alexander]Yes, I ran into this quote browsing for the DVD case.. guess it sums it all up for me.

I skipped Master and Commander. The poster looked boring...

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 18:29

#88

Alexander

From: Holland

Joined: 02/16/2003

Good for you!

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"[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system."[/CENTER]

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 19:04

#89

MercyRule

From: Canada

Joined: 06/25/2004

The worts movie, of all time, hands down............

"Mr.Wrong" with Ellen Degeneres.

I actually killed myself after I saw that movie.
shot myself in my head.

I got better though.

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[COLOR=DarkOrange][FONT=Impact]Hows about we take the warning labels off of everything and let nature sort it's self out?[/FONT][/COLOR]

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 19:26

#90

Alexander

From: Holland

Joined: 02/16/2003

[QUOTE=MercyRule]The worts movie, of all time, hands down............

"Mr.Wrong" with Ellen Degeneres.

I actually killed myself after I saw that movie.
shot myself in my head.

I got better though.[/QUOTE]

And..uuh you're fav must be 'Deep Blue Sea' with Samual 'MMMmm mmm..tasty burger!' Jackson, am I right?
Why did you watch 'Mr Wrong'?

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[CENTER][IMG]http://www.moralminority.org/graphics/mm/riverscuom-1.jpg[/IMG]
"[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system."[/CENTER]

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 19:33

#91

MercyRule

From: Canada

Joined: 06/25/2004

Why did you watch Deep Blue Sea?

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[COLOR=DarkOrange][FONT=Impact]Hows about we take the warning labels off of everything and let nature sort it's self out?[/FONT][/COLOR]

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 19:51

#92

Alexander

From: Holland

Joined: 02/16/2003

Did you see the South Park movie?

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"[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system."[/CENTER]

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 20:07

#93

MercyRule

From: Canada

Joined: 06/25/2004

I have this brain disorder, where if someone made a movie, I have to watch it.
yeah, I saw the south park movie

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[COLOR=DarkOrange][FONT=Impact]Hows about we take the warning labels off of everything and let nature sort it's self out?[/FONT][/COLOR]

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 20:19

#94

Alexander

From: Holland

Joined: 02/16/2003

Watch 'La grande bouffe', then watch it again muted and play your favourite music to it...then take a look in the mirror and see how weird you can really get. Brain candle.

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"[It's] time for the human race to enter the solar system."[/CENTER]

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 21:45

#95

Fino35

From: HOLLYWOOD, CA

Joined: 02/24/2003

[B]I dissagree:[/B]
- "Tango & Cash"
- "The Players Club"
- "Unbreakable"
- "Stepmom"
- "Strangeland"

[B]I really really agree:[/B]
- Any film with Whoopi Goldberg
- "Good Burger"
- "Practical Magic"
- "Pure Country"
- "Fair Game"
- "Fire down below"
- Rosie O' Donnell & Ricki Lake
- Any sequel to "Universal Soldier"
- Any sequel to "Under Seige"
- "Double Dragon"
- "Street Fighter"

[B]I really really super duper agree to the max:[/B]
- Any sequel to "House Party"

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 21:48

#96

karbunkle

From: The Other Side of the Wind

Joined: 10/27/2003

robin harris [b]made[/b] that first one
when he died so did the rest

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 22:01

#97

Ozymandias

Doesn't Take Too Kindly To Your Type

From: Justin to Kelly

Joined: 05/19/2003

Unbreakable was off the hizzle fo shizzle and any Worst Of list that excludes Back to the Future 2 is intrinsically flawed. Aside from that, all those movies can be thrown into the memory hole with minimal cultural loss. Also toss in:

Back to tha Future 2, obvizzle
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
House of 1000 Corpses
Problem Child 2
No Holds Barred
Congo

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It's not easy having a good time.
Even smiling makes my face ache.

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 22:02

#98

Ozymandias

Doesn't Take Too Kindly To Your Type

From: Justin to Kelly

Joined: 05/19/2003

[QUOTE=Fino35][B]I dissagree:[/B]
- "Stepmom"[/QUOTE]
You should be arrested for impersonating a male.

__________________________

It's not easy having a good time.
Even smiling makes my face ache.

Fri, 07/30/2004 - 22:10

#99

Parkaboy

Fortean Mime.

From: Behind you.

Joined: 03/31/2003

[QUOTE=Brock Landers]They are not original stories. They have no redeeming values. They are made to cash in on one-hit wonders and celebrities of the week... anyhow, thoughts? Questions? Adolation for The Brockster?[/QUOTE]

Love's Labors Lost is Shakespeare's weakest play. Or is anyhow acknowledged as such. But, I hate musicals and I thought Brannagh did an alright job with a lame premise. It's not a great film, maybe not even very good. But I can't put it on a hate list.

Lost in Space, while be a bad film overall, had some good premises in it's script by Akiva Goldsman. The two Will Robinsons and all, and Gary Oldman as Dr. Smith was certainly a "redeeming' feature. I saw it tripping, though, and it had some eye-candy that helped assuage the general crapfest it was otherwise.

The rest of your list is mostly spot-on. Though there are of course omissions. Jean-Claude Van Damme films, in general, I think could all be on there.

Sandra Bullock fluff pics.

Keanu Reeves trying to take on a dramitic role is usually poison for the whole film.

There was no excuse for the Psycho remake.

The Thin Red Line was pretentious on many levels, then invented some new ones and was pretentious on those.

The Yellow Submarine scare the crap out of me, though that doesn't count as terrible I suppose.

Micheal Bay should not be allowed to make films. Any. Ever. Period.

That's all I got right now....

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Fri, 07/30/2004 - 22:10

#100

Fino35

From: HOLLYWOOD, CA

Joined: 02/24/2003

I IMDB'd it.

oh crap, I was thinking about "serial mom"