Your Ultimate Cultie Crime-Fighting Team!

didn't somebody make this exact same thread a long while ago?

We'd go around drunk insulting disgusting people that are happy, because they don't deserve it. Morey because he founded this fine art, Lofi because she can be lure them in all quiet and shit, Cassun because he's good at being drunk and obnoxious, plus he's big, so if shit kicked off, we could all hide in his gut, and Six because she's small and obnoxious, and people would just, go 'What the fuck?', and also because they're all vaguely amusing when it comes down to it. If I had to choose one more person though to throw up there, it'd be Ironman. Just imagine letting him loose on people, it'd be madness!

I just read an article in some wizard magazine from like 2003(?) that listed The Authority as the greatest super-hero team of all time. Even above the JLA and Avengers!

Fuck yeah, The Authority be the shit.
Warren Ellis though, he could wipe his arse on a piece of paper and it'd make a great comic.

I have a good idea for a four person team I'd call EMOsquad, but...I don't wan tot insult anyone on here, even if some of them aren't around anymore.

The guy on the bottom looks like he was just taking a nice dump in the park when the Authority interrupted him. He's pissed off!

The Purple Pooper!

I guarantee you Ironman is a coward in the public arena.

We'd feed him coke and watch as he grew more and more megalomanic, until eventually he ripped off his clothes and tried to chase down Six. We'd all shit ourselves laughing and Six would punch him in the face and he'd cry, but then we'd let him attack some people in a hotel foyer, and that'd be hilarious. He'd be like a pet.

I'll have to think of four, but I will say that I wish this girl posted here. I'd definitely take her.

Are everyone behind her purposely doing the Michael Jackson's Thriller thing?

Of course, that's why their eyes are glowing.

Moshpit girl was all the rage a few years ago. Still funny.

http://www.ebaked.com/blog/moshpit-girl-photoshops/

She's fierce

Captain Irrelevant: Giggan
Captain Oblivious: Six on the Dot
Captain Obnoxious: morey
Captain Intolerable: Corellion

Meanwhile, at the Bringers of the ______ hideout....

Nightrious takes the floor.

"We are all seated here today to begin meet one-sixty-two of the Bringers of the ______ crime fighting agency. We have yet to fight any crime or decide on what crime to fight, but I believe we are a strong group and will eventually come to the conclusions that bind us, the conclusions that drive us, the conclusions..."

Captain Oblivious: For christ sakes...

"Sorry."

Captain Intolerable: Enough with the Matrix shit already.

"Okay, okay, let me continue. We have yet to decide on what we will be Bringing, as masked heroes, so we've yet to construct a useable name."

Captain Oblivious: Who decided on Bringer?

Captain Obnoxious: It sounds stupid.

"I thought we all did. I thought we agreed on that."

Captain Intolerable: You proposed it and you agreed on it. The fucking Bringers of _____? Scrap that.

Captain Irrelevant: Seconded.

Captain Intolerable: Did you just get here?

Captain Irrelevant: No I've been here the whole time, obviously, you didn't hear the door just now did you?

Captain Intolerable: Fuck off.

Captain Oblivious: Seconded.

"So we don't have any of our name made yet?"

Captain Obnoxious: We have to figure out what sort of crime we'll be fighting first.

"Any suggestions?"

Captain Obnoxious: Let's just kill ugly people like I said in the beginning.

Captain Oblivious: Yes! UGLY PPL FTW!

"We're trying to fucking fight crime here, not deciding who to kill. You people are so shallow...don't you see the beauty of human life? Of human intellect, that one thriving element of self knowing that exists in our universe..."

Captain Oblivious: Yeah but some people don't look good.

Captain Obnoxious: We should kill them all.

Captain Irrelevant: Can you tell Alex not to smoke in here?

Captain Intolerable: It's a fucking bat cave you festering thrivalent of a contrivial qrice. Jesus. I can't even keep up with myself anymore. I think I'll third this ugly people thing just so I won't have to deal with Giggan anymore.

"We aren't kiilling ugly people! For fuck sucks..."

Captain Irrelevant: Killing people is absurd, and protecting them is really just supressing them. If we really want to make a difference we should use our power to convince people to fight for themselves, for their own freedom, to denounce the ways of a society that has taken their free will--God given or otherwise.

Captain Intolerable: Eaglemoose!

Captain Irrelevant: You say humanity is beautiful for its intellect--very ancient greek of you. But I prefer to think of humanity's divinity as its ability to choose for itself. Will over reason. Without will, you have nothing.

"This is getting interesting, I'll put some tea on."

Captain Obnoxious: Can I go? I have to be somewhere?

Captain Oblivious: What was that about Eaglemoose?

"I have an idea for our name: The Undecided."

Captain Intolerable: Seconded.

Captain Oblivious: Seconded.

Captain Irrelevant: Thirded.

Captain Obnoxious: Yeah, me too.

"The Undecided... I like that."

Captain Irrelevant: At least we've made a decision on our name.

"So in a way we aren't undecided..."

Captain Irrelevant: Unless our decision is indecision.

"No. Perhaps we've already made the decision. Now we must understand why we made it..."

Captain Intolerable: Shut the fuck up, Trinity.

Captain Obnoxious: I'm getting out of here. See you guys!

Ahahahahahah! That is almost fantastically on the bell. More!

Isn't Warren Ellis the lead violinist for Dirty Three? He's co-composing the score for The Road with Nick Cave, which is going to be amazing.

Night!! That is pure fucking GENIUS!! I busted a gut laughing as soon as I read "Captain Irrelevant: Giggan." Seriously. This needs to keep going.

That was excellent.

shush.

Really, though it's more like.

Me: You know, if you add sugar to tea after the milk, it tastes quite sweet and is like mulled wine.

Nightrious: I like tea, the world is beautiful, the other day I saw a cloud and thought, "What it would be like, oh, to live as a cloud!" and I smoked a joint and my cousin came round and I quit my job.

Giggan: You quit your job, man! Yeah! Libertine! Libertine!

Me: You mean Liberty.

Six: Someone is being sarcastic, I better agree with them so people know I'm fiesty!

Giggan: No Libertine = free and holy!

Nightrious: Oh, they're arguing? I'm going to do my nails and talk out loud as if I was talking in my head. I have lovely girly nails, they're beautiful. I saw a woman with beautiful nails once, I wanted to smell her vagina and play with it. She didn't even know I existed, oh, le sigh.

Me: No, a Libertine is a dissolute person; usually a person who is morally unrestrained.

Giggan: Like me! Anarchy! Anarchy! Anarchy!

Six: Yo, boi, I be hip nao, I be listenin to teh rappery and stuffz. I leik Atmosphere! Yo bitch, I'll fuck ya in da ear!

Me: No... just no...

Morey: I want to fuck Nightrious.

Me: What?

Giggan: What?

Six: What?

Nightrious: Homosexuals should be killed!

Morey: That's sexy when you say that.

Giggan: *whispers* I am a libertine.

Me: No you're not! You're not even sensible. Where is your God now?

Six: Yeah boi, where he be at?

Giggan: God is omni-

Me: God is omni blah blah blah blah blah blah, I have curly hair and a gun, I believe in freedom.

Giggan: There's a video of me with my gun next to Ron Paul, I could shoot you.

Me: You bitch.

Six: Yo, yeah, he a bitch!

Nightrious: I want to let them know I'm interested in this.

Morey: Can I see your cock?

Giggan: Sometimes I think about shooting Ron Paul.

Me: You need help, freak.

Six: Yo, yez, sick jokes lol, mudkipz, tits, over 9000, I love Alex Cassun.

Me: *shakes head*

How is it that morey has not yet said "poop"?

shhhhhh

HAHAHAHA, oh man. I gotta go smoke a joint.

lawl

perfection.

Amusing but there's not nearly enough irrational outbursts and teenage twatery from that Me character.