your room!

go to your room!

haha, just jestin` ya.

Haha, I thought you were just joking about making this thread.

This is the awesomist idea for a thread ever.

[Not Sarcasm]

I have to post in here cause I made big S mad in my "ask Jane anything thread".

I'm sorry.

I'll think about what I did.

Dance with me brother hammer!

[IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v471/UbikRex/hammertime.gif[/IMG]

Amen.

Well, now that i'm here. I guess I should share this life pondering question with everyone.[URL=http://www.mypleasure.com/features/bulletins/9.asp]Where do you....[/URL]

Chris, that's gross, go to your room!

[QUOTE=jane s.]Chris, that's gross, go to your room![/QUOTE]

AHH!!!

:eek:
*covers the butterfly basket*
:eek:

Get out of my ROOM!

I have to go in here because I showed snuffy links to hilarious novelty vibrators.

I'm in here because of Reverend Hammer aka Haemorrhoid keeps wanting to dance on the cult.

[QUOTE=UbikRex]Well, now that i'm here. I guess I should share this life pondering question with everyone.[URL=http://www.mypleasure.com/features/bulletins/9.asp]Where do you....[/URL][/QUOTE]
Right where the kids can find them, of course!

Oh man...I have cute sex toy story, but I'm eating right now...I'll spill later

Okay...my tum-tum if full of good greasy-meaty tator-totery goodness...

So...god, this awkward...anyways, I have this dresser, it's all wooden, very nice actually, I've had it since I was a child...I actually remember when my folks bought it, it was at Montgomery Wards!!

Anywho...I have this dresser, and I had...ahem...this dildo

Wait...IF YOU ARE MY SISTER, DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER...FORGET YOU EVER HEARD THAT WORD, AND GO READ SOMETHING ELSE!

So anyways, I had this dildo...it was red and was like gelly like shit...kinda like a gummi-dildo, but not. So anyways, that was my dildo...well, after a while, a short time really, it started to get kinda funky, but NOT BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU'RE THINKING!!! It was like it started to break down chemically and had this very bad chemical smell, so I stopped using...oh dear god...I just didn't mess with it anymore, and it just stayed at the bottom of the dresser drawer. So anyways, the gummi-ness of it totally was breaking down...it turned all gooey and shit, and smelled like a chemical plant! So I finally decided to throw it away, but when I remvoed it from my dresser drawer, all the oil and goo from it breaking down STAINDED THE DRAWER...in the perfect shape of...well, a dildo!! IT was a cock and balls dildo, or at least partial balls, so it left and imprint that looked just like a really large penis...

So I'm like SHIT, 'casue I was actually trying to give it away, and hod someone at work who wanted it, but it had a PENIS stain in the drawer...it was a oil like stain, and could not be removed!! So needless to say, I have yet to figure out where to throw the dresser, and it's presently shut up in storage in the Pac. Northwest...

That's it, that's my story....

[QUOTE=succotash moon]Okay...my tum-tum if full of good greasy-meaty tator-totery goodness...

So...god, this awkward...anyways, I have this dresser, it's all wooden, very nice actually, I've had it since I was a child...I actually remember when my folks bought it, it was at Montgomery Wards!!

Anywho...I have this dresser, and I had...ahem...this dildo

Wait...IF YOU ARE MY SISTER, DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER...FORGET YOU EVER HEARD THAT WORD, AND GO READ SOMETHING ELSE!

So anyways, I had this dildo...it was red and was like gelly like shit...kinda like a gummi-dildo, but not. So anyways, that was my dildo...well, after a while, a short time really, it started to get kinda funky, but NOT BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU'RE THINKING!!! It was like it started to break down chemically and had this very bad chemical smell, so I stopped using...oh dear god...I just didn't mess with it anymore, and it just stayed at the bottom of the dresser drawer. So anyways, the gummi-ness of it totally was breaking down...it turned all gooey and shit, and smelled like a chemical plant! So I finally decided to throw it away, but when I remvoed it from my dresser drawer, all the oil and goo from it breaking down STAINDED THE DRAWER...in the perfect shape of...well, a dildo!! IT was a cock and balls dildo, or at least partial balls, so it left and imprint that looked just like a really large penis...

So I'm like SHIT, 'casue I was actually trying to give it away, and hod someone at work who wanted it, but it had a PENIS stain in the drawer...it was a oil like stain, and could not be removed!! So needless to say, I have yet to figure out where to throw the dresser, and it's presently shut up in storage in the Pac. Northwest...

That's it, that's my story....[/QUOTE]
Give it to someone and just say you have a really sweaty boyfriend or something.

But the penis stain is INSIDE THE DRAWER!!! Why would my boyfriend's sweaty penis be in my dresser drawer?!

Oh that's just sick!!

Tell em he was also a midget with a fetish for drawers.

Wow, that's hard to get rid off. May i suggest paint? how awesome IS this closet anyway? modern fake wood? or decades old wood?

it's real wood...no veneers, no particle or cheap ply board...real wood, wait, WHY ARE WE DISCUSSING THIS?![B] I hit a coffin with a puppetshow, what am I doing here?![/B]

well, according to the net, I'm wrong...it's actually "I hit a casket with a puppet stage. What am I doing here? "

So there you go...

and if anyone can tell me what movie that is from, I'll...YOU WIN A FREE DRESSER!!1

[QUOTE=succotash moon]well, according to the net, I'm wrong...it's actually "I hit a casket with a puppet stage. What am I doing here? "

So there you go...

and if anyone can tell me what movie that is from, I'll...YOU WIN A FREE DRESSER!!1[/QUOTE]
Moving violations! do i get the free dessert now??

Uhm, WOW!

...I so thought I was the only living soul who knew that movie...

I was wrong! You get my sweaty penis stained dresser!

Fake Plstic Trees is so cute... "free dessert"

ah shit, you guys rock!

soiled. SOILED.

I'm in here because I am too young and you are all OLD!

I'm having fun imagining moonie's reaction to reading that story above after so long...

[QUOTE=succotash moon;699220]Okay...my tum-tum if full of good greasy-meaty tator-totery goodness...

So...god, this awkward...anyways, I have this dresser, it's all wooden, very nice actually, I've had it since I was a child...I actually remember when my folks bought it, it was at Montgomery Wards!!

Anywho...I have this dresser, and I had...ahem...this dildo

Wait...IF YOU ARE MY SISTER, DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER...FORGET YOU EVER HEARD THAT WORD, AND GO READ SOMETHING ELSE!

So anyways, I had this dildo...it was red and was like gelly like shit...kinda like a gummi-dildo, but not. So anyways, that was my dildo...well, after a while, a short time really, it started to get kinda funky, but NOT BECAUSE OF WHAT YOU'RE THINKING!!! It was like it started to break down chemically and had this very bad chemical smell, so I stopped using...oh dear god...I just didn't mess with it anymore, and it just stayed at the bottom of the dresser drawer. So anyways, the gummi-ness of it totally was breaking down...it turned all gooey and shit, and smelled like a chemical plant! So I finally decided to throw it away, but when I remvoed it from my dresser drawer, all the oil and goo from it breaking down STAINDED THE DRAWER...in the perfect shape of...well, a dildo!! IT was a cock and balls dildo, or at least partial balls, so it left and imprint that looked just like a really large penis...

So I'm like SHIT, 'casue I was actually trying to give it away, and hod someone at work who wanted it, but it had a PENIS stain in the drawer...it was a oil like stain, and could not be removed!! So needless to say, I have yet to figure out where to throw the dresser, and it's presently shut up in storage in the Pac. Northwest...

That's it, that's my story....[/QUOTE]

Hey, that gummy chemical breaking-down thing happened to one of the knobs on my stereo. It's really annoying! Why do they build things that break down so easily? I obviously value durability, not gumminess, when it comes to the radio-dial-knob-thing on the stereo. I dunno if this is the same way you feel about your dildo but like... fuck you, Sony!

Oh deary dear...

I told the chat kids last night what happened to the dresser, it got seized with all my other stuff at the storage place, so god only knows where it's at now...

But I am comforted knowing that my big red jelly dildo stained dresser is somewhere in this universe...still stained...

This reminded me of something my friend that works in the emergency room once told me. The hospital is in an urban area and therefore gets a lot more gay male patients than a country hospital so these dudes are coming in with dildos stuck up their asses all of the time because they cut the fake balls off of them. So she always tells them, "They put balls on a dildo for a reason, it's not just to be anatomically correct."

There should be public service announcements:
DON'T CUT THE BALLS OF YOUR DILDO.

LMFAO! May be they should write a whole Dildo usage guide