TMI
Only if it's consensual.
Tooweirdtooweirdtooweird!
Yeah. But it stands. Guys Gaddafiing other guys doesn't mean they like it... at least not usually... I think...
Si vis pacem, para bellum
What's Gaddafiing?
Oh man Fap in the shower is the best. Or a fap and nap.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
I thought you were implying that you raped your pinky. I still think you are. Don't make this about Libya.
Sticking random things up people's butts. I think Tosh.0 started it, but I'm not sure.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
I thought you were implying that you raped your pinky. I still think you are. Don't make this about Libya.
And I thought you were implying I like male pinkies up my butt. I would largely prefer the smaller, female pinky... you know... if I WANTED something up my butt...
>.>
Si vis pacem, para bellum
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Okay.
After this emotional roller coaster, I need a nap.
Showering before a fap? Or during?
During.
I've never understood how people can masturbate standing up, ergo a lot of porn confuses me.
Of all the stupid improbable shit that happens in porn, that is what confuses you?
This is why we can't have nice things.
Yeah, I mean, I covered the rest of it in my senior thesis, but the cumming while standing thing just doesn't fly with me.
I couldn't find the nail clippers today, but I found some garden sheers.
It didn't work that well.
Showering before a fap? Or during?
During.
I've never understood how people can masturbate standing up, ergo a lot of porn confuses me.
I don't have a shower, I have a bath tub. And I am not going to tell the position, but it's definitely not standing. Standing is for sex.
Didn't you ever have to jerk off in the woods?
I thought this was the TMI thread, and no I haven't ever had to in the woods.
I've been practicing and I can finally finish with just my hands. no vibrating anything.
I'm really proud.
“if you want to be a bird,” you said once, “with colorful plumage and buoyant trills, you must also be ready for hollow bones."
Oh, man.
Oh, man indeed. My sex drive is shot to shit these days.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
I want to make a mold of my dick and make a silicone toy out of the mold but I have no idea where to get the supplies to do so.
Is that so you can fuck yourself?
Well, duh, Rittley.
Various Adult Shopping centres online sell just such kits, Justin. Try adam & eve.
Or, you know, so I am told.
This is why we can't have nice things.
I've always wanted to have it with my own clone but I think it might feel too much like shagging a twin brother.
Those Clone-A-Willy kits are cheap. I wanted to make something a that was a bit more 'professional' looking so I went online and looked up the prices of silicone and molding materials and holy fuck is this shit expensive. Like over $100 for a gallon of the stuff and that's not including dyes and "tactile enhancers."
In other dildo-related news, I've been thinking about getting rid of some of my BD toys I bought years ago and rarely ever used but a part of me wants to hang on to them simply because I paid so much for them and it would seem like such a waste.
You don't need a gallon. Hell, even I don't need a full gallon.
This is why we can't have nice things.
Tuffy thinks he has a big peepee.
Uncanny.
This is why we can't have nice things.
I just had a hidden message in my own post.....
Uncanny.
Of course it's not canny. It's a bottle!
My buddy used to package those things. He says they work well enough. I want to get one that way I can just mount it someplace in my house.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
Dildos or 2-liters of Coke?
There's a difference?
This is why we can't have nice things.
Dildo kits.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
If you're going to mount one, I recommend the bedroom.
This is why we can't have nice things.
I typed this but then deleted it because I didn't want the internet to think I was that kind of girl.
Well done.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
What did you say, Jess? That a dildo doesn't explode after use?
That certainly sounds like something I'd say.
I'm in your mind. Stealing your pervy thoughts.
My official guess is that she said "No."
Not because she's got a floppy vagina, but because she's ballsy enough to say that shit.
Technically a baby is about that size when delivered.
And ew I am going to bed with this image in my head. Ew.
Not because she's got a floppy vagina, but because she's ballsy enough to say that shit.
EXCUSE ME!
Spicy man and cheese.
The trifecta of stomach pain. Gluten, dairy, and all sorts of spicy.
And we ran out of toilet paper...
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
The Montage strikes again! I have heard that lament many times!
Mom's gonna fix it all soon.
The trifecta of stomach pain. Gluten, dairy, and all sorts of spicy.
And we ran out of toilet paper...
I just have to quote this.
Man and cheese, mac and cheese. Same thing
And yes the Montage I hate the seeting there.
"Hey here is an idea, lets line up a bunch of tables, stack them side by side, cram a few more in over there and force strangers to sit next to eachother making a romantic date hard to manage when you have drunk buisnessman doing oystershots at your elbows."
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
and a spicy man and cheese in front of you to devour.
I want oystershots now.
This is why we can't have nice things.
I want more mac and cheese.
And TP
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
From eating so much garlic in the past 24 hours(about 6 cloves) everytime I pass gas it smells like fresh garlic, thank god no one is sitting next to me right now.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
Showering before a fap? Or during?
During.
K, good.
Si vis pacem, para bellum