TMI
I say go for it. Just lay it on the table and hope for the best.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
So deep in the friend zone might make things weird. Masterbating isn't all that bad...... Sigh
Though your slippers are ruby, you'll be led to the booby trap
I love to rub one out dont get me wrong. But you just have to bring it up in the right way. It worked for me with one of my friends, we had our thing, ended on good terms and she is still one of my best friends. Once the sexual tention was gone it was a lot easier.
Maybe I just got lucky but hot sticky sex could be in your future
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
Just fucking? Nothing else?
Si vis pacem, para bellum
Yes just fucking cause to be his girlfriend you need to jump through hoops. Too lazy for that I'll take the sex please.
Though your slippers are ruby, you'll be led to the booby trap
Careful. Oxytocin is dangerous.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
Unless you're butt ugly, you're not in the friend zone if you're a girl. He wants to fiddle your diddle too, trust me.
That's exactly what I needed to hear, ill make my move this weekend.
Popcorn.jpg
Though your slippers are ruby, you'll be led to the booby trap
I masturbated in the sea once this week. Well, it was technically last week, when the waves were bigger, but still.
That's hot. Really hot. Can't do anything about it now cause I'm at work so thanks.
Though your slippers are ruby, you'll be led to the booby trap
Girls masturbate?
The sea frightens me. I'm going to have anxiety instead of trying to make a dumb joke about clams or everyone's infatuation with Shark Week on The Discovery Channel which, by the way...What the fuck is with everybody and fuckin' Shark Week?! "Shark Week, man!! Fuckin' Shark Week!" My friend asked if I was "excited for that". I said, "What the fuck?"
I have two red knees because there were big waves and I got tumbled over a few times and almost bit the sand. It wasn't very nice.
What if the ocean knew what you were doing and that was it's way of humping you?
Dammit I didn't think of that. And it's a sea.
I don't care. It's a pervert.
I agree. It was stripping everybody when the waves hit!
I've masturbated in the sea. In lakes, rivers, duckponds....
You really don't want to have me over for your pool party.
This is why we can't have nice things.
What inspired you to rub one out in the ocean? Seems like it was a lot of trouble.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
Ew
Salt causes friction. Word to the wise.
This is why we can't have nice things.
I pooped in the sea once. When I was like nine. I didn't want to leave and there were no bathrooms so I swam out as far as I could while still touching the bottom and let out a turd, then swam back over to where everyone was hanging out.
All you perverts can just consider that next time you go out in the water and get all horny. Watch out for conspicuous looking drift wood floating round.
Oh my god! Hahahah That's classic.
Well, now I'll always have naughty thoughts about Irina every time I go to the ocean. Thanks a lot Irina! You ruined the purity of my eventual honeymoon!
Si vis pacem, para bellum
If the question was for me, it was because I'd gotten wet and I would've stained my swimming suit. Something had to be done!
The picture thread isn't helping my situation.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
If the question was for me, it was because I'd gotten wet and I would've stained my swimming suit. Something had to be done!
What? This, ...just makes no sense...
But didn't the sea water get you wet? And aren't swimming suits specifically for getting wet?
Most importantly. How does maturating rid one of stains? I must have this information. You see, I have never ending laundry to wash, and, well, it could be more pleasant.
Gotten wet as in aroused. If you do it long enough (which isn't very long in my case), it eventually almost dries out and you get no stains. It's super-effective.
Some people will use *any* excuse.
This is why we can't have nice things.
Hardly. That was the only time over the course of one week. Even having my own bed and a lockable bathroom door didn't move me.
Oh! I'm in the ocean! *fap*
Oh! I'm out of cigarettes! *fap*
Oh! It's raining! *fap*
Oh! It's tea time! *fap*
Oh! I'm bored! *fap*
Oh! It's been at least twenty minutes since the last one... *fap*
This is why we can't have nice things.
I just noticed, I'm out of cigarettes...
(I think I'll just run up to the market)
Hmm... I agree with pepper... i dont get it
Do people need an excuse. Shit, fap and nap, rise and shine.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
There's some kind of psychotic element to fapping in the sea. In the midst of all the danger in there. You got chemicals, behemoth waves, killer animals, seaweed or sand or rocks that could all get inside you, people pissing around you, the potential to be swept away and abducted by pirates if you don't drown. Not to mention it's usually cold as hell shit. I have to wonder what else one would fap in...a lions den? A volcano? Earthquake? A shooting spree? Hostage situation? Terrorist attack? A nuclear holocaust? I feel like researchers should examine this. Psychologists. Neurologists. Irina and other subjects alike fapping in a lab before Harvard professors who point loaded guns at them. I feel there should be essays written. Thesises made. Thesii? Oh! I'm research! *fap*
What about a BEAR CAVE?
What if the sea is actually salty from everybody fapping in it so much?
I would *have* to fap inside a volcano, should I ever find myself inside such.
This is why we can't have nice things.
What if all volcanic eruptions were just volcanoes fapping?
Theses.
OH IF YOU'RE SO SMART WHY ARE YOU FAPPING IN THE SEA
BECAUSE NO ONE SILLY DOES IT, DUH.
You know what would be a funny joke? Marry into an Asian family last-named Sea, have a kid and name it Oshin.
Oshin Sea! Hahaha! LOL!
It would become a famous athlete.
Oshin Sea! Hahaha! LOL!
It would become a famous athlete.
Except if you go traditional, he'd be Sea Oshin. Still funny, though.
I did a rough estimate the other day and determined that I've masturbated between eight and ten thousand times in my life. It's tough to say for sure.
I switched anti-depressants and now I'm terribly worried about my sex life. 
Is that a good enough confession? Because I got told my other one was awful.
I hit that mark before I'd turned 17.
This is why we can't have nice things.
I can't estimate the number of times I've masturbated, but I know precisely how many times I've had sex.
I couldn't even begin to guess the amount of times I've had sex.
Maybe around 8 or 9 thousand times? only counting actual intercourse.
I constantly masterbate thinking about my one of my best friends but I don't have the balls to tell him I want to fuck the shit out of him.
Though your slippers are ruby, you'll be led to the booby trap