TMI
That goes for pretty much every good thing on this earth.
Abstinence makes the Heart grow Fonder, or something.
Do you not have a shower, dudeguy?
I almost exclusively use sleeves these days.
My hand just doesn't cut it anymore.
I wonder if my 3rd cousin or maybe 4th, is going to be at the funeral, my brother lost his V card to her. After the last big family funeral.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
After my first big family funeral my cousin tried to rub my neck and then tried to get me to sit in his lap.
Then he gave me his email. Then he gave me his other email, in case I wanted to write just him, not him and his wife.
@awkwardtwoamlibraryconversations
Ya my brother Porked her(Yes thats the propper term) then we went back to the afterparty/wake. And they were holding hands and sitting close. The entire family was freaked out. But its a good story when I tell the whole thing.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
That was an episode of Grounded For Life.
My sister's husband and my brother's wife had an ongoing affair.
Things got... ugly.
I LOLed.
It's good to be the Black Sheep.
Tuffy the Dump Truck may rarely increase the risk of a heart attack or stroke. The risk may be greater if you have heart disease or increased risk for heart disease (for example, due to smoking, family history of heart disease, or conditions such as high blood pressure or diabetes), or with longer use. Tuffy should not be taken right before or after heart bypass surgery. Also, Tuffy may infrequently cause serious (rarely fatal) bleeding from the stomach or intestines. This effect can occur without warning symptoms at any time while taking Tuffy. Older adults may be at higher risk for this effect. (See also Precautions and Drug Interactions sections.) Stop taking Tuffy and get medical help right away if you notice any of the following rare but serious side effects: bloody or black/tarry stools, persistent stomach/abdominal pain, vomit that looks like coffee grounds, chest/jaw/left arm pain, shortness of breath, unusual sweating, weakness on one side of the body, sudden vision changes, slurred speech. Ask your doctor if Tuffy is right for you.
That must have been pretty bad.
No kidding. That sounds fucking awful.
TMI: My nethers feel soooo smooth. Nothing like a new body hair trimmer/shaver to make you feel young again.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
Things got... ugly.
I LOLed.
It's good to be the Black Sheep.
This is like what a footballer here did! Unbelievable, what are some people like?!
It also happened in Legends of the Fall, twice!
hahaha, Hattie
The woman was a slag! I do love that movie though.
EDIT: Wrong thread.
I periodically bleed out of my ass when I defecate. It's been happening since I was 17, I've been to 5 doctors and had 2 endoscopies in the past 8 years and no one has been able to figure out what's wrong with me. Sometimes it's really bad.
Self improvement comes from trimming away the shit, not building up on top of it.
Stop drinking blood.
I'm cooking breakfast on the same pan I used yesterday.
Son where I come from that's pretty normal, yesterdays flavour mixed with todays, mmmmmmm
Self improvement comes from trimming away the shit, not building up on top of it.
I call it re-scrambled eggs.
Booby tape!
Had my first threesome last night.
"We're developing a new citizenry. One that will be very selective about cereals and automobiles, but won't be able to think."
— Rod Serling
"Chuck calls Noah fortnightly on his bakelite rotary phone and gives him publisher's insider information and stock tips."- Tuffy
so... how did it go? did someone get bored and make a sandwich?
Details would be much appreciated.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
Agreed. What kind of sandwich?
No sandwiches or boredom involved, thankfully. Just two ladies and a male having fun.
"We're developing a new citizenry. One that will be very selective about cereals and automobiles, but won't be able to think."
— Rod Serling
"Chuck calls Noah fortnightly on his bakelite rotary phone and gives him publisher's insider information and stock tips."- Tuffy
I want to say two hands don't make a threesome but I'm honestly jealous, requesting more details of this!
Self improvement comes from trimming away the shit, not building up on top of it.
But two hands do make a sandwich.
And that's just as good as any threesome. We need a sandwich thread!
Self improvement comes from trimming away the shit, not building up on top of it.
Every thread is a sandwich thread if you wait long enough.
We must already have one. I seem to remember we ad one.
I've spent a good chunk of today researching vasectomies. Why? Because morbid fascination. And your bodies are weird. All of them.
Who're you planning to vasectomize?
Si vis pacem, para bellum
Whoever signs up first, I suppose. Will be half price since I'll be winging it.
I'm in.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
Isaac is going to pay Jessica to torture his secret bits.
Take pictures please.
Take pictures please.
For Science. 
Have I been getting creepy lately?
I feel I might be, and it worries me.
This is why people think we're in love with each other. Weirdos. This isn't even close to flirting.
Anyway, meet me at 10 tomorrow. Don't wear pants.
Anyway, meet me at 10 tomorrow. Don't wear pants.
If I had a dollar for every time a girl said that to me, I'd have .75 cents.
This is why people think we're in love with each other. Weirdos. This isn't even close to flirting.
Anyway, meet me at 10 tomorrow. Don't wear pants.
I do not understand Halloween.
Anyway, meet me at 10 tomorrow. Don't wear pants.
I'll bring some drinks and mood music.
... What!? We need disinfectant! And I need the music to keep me relaxed so my boys don't retreat.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
What pussies. It's just a pair of pliers.
Cold pliers.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
Last night I watched Phantoms while laying in bed with two naked dudes.
I jerked off in less than three minutes today while my roommate went to the vending machine. I think that's a personal best(worst?).
I used to do that when my ex would go to the bathroom after we had sex.
"We're developing a new citizenry. One that will be very selective about cereals and automobiles, but won't be able to think."
— Rod Serling
"Chuck calls Noah fortnightly on his bakelite rotary phone and gives him publisher's insider information and stock tips."- Tuffy
Impressive stuff.
I'm fairly confident you are now unable to reproduce. I guess we'll find out in a few months.
Remember to leave me a good Yelp review!
No more wallet indent!
Si vis pacem, para bellum
It's the best when you don't do it for a while then do it.