those people creatures
In a recent conversation with my guy a person we know was brought up and I told him that I like her but she is very tedious and boring to be around - she annoys me much. He questioned my paradox of liking her but not wanting to be around her/talk to her on the phone and so one. I realised that on the surface it sounded very superficial and mean girlish. I had give some thought to exactly what I meant when I said these things because I knew I didn't mean it in such a shallow way.
I ended up thinking of another idividual I knew some years back who was engaging, interesting to talk with, and, if not funny, certianly amusing, yet at the bottom of it he was a complete creep and I couldn't stand him one bit, I truly ended up loathing him by the end of knowing him. The sort of person that sucks you easily in but eventually leaves you feeling ucky and in need of fresh air.
(So no one worries - I am talking about people I've known in my real life outside the internet.)
This other guy is, to me, a good analogy of how it isn't about surface stuff.
I think it is perfectly possible to care about and like someone who is utterly unineresting to you, as in the case with the first person I mentioned who is a very loving, kind and worthy person, just as it is possible to detest someone who has the abbility to engage you intellectually for their lack of merit when it comes to being an honest human being.
Since I haven't made a real topic in a while, I thought a topic about personal ethics when it comes to how to relate to the people in your life and new people you meet might make for some interesting conversation.
What makes you like people, do you like everyone initially until they prove unworthy of your energy or are you skeptical of humans and need to be won over before you think good of them?
What are your deal breakers and/or makers?
Personally I have a tendancy to like everyone, but I am very wary of becoming intwined with anyone. This is a bit of a problem for me because I would rather have a few deep friendships than many small talk lets go to coffee aquaintances. The problem happens because I end up meeting plenty of people but shying away from letting any of them in to actually become what I consider real friends with. So basically I like everyone but don't trust anyone.
I don't want this topic to be about talking crap about people anyone knows. That is why I left out any details that would show who the people I mentioned are.
On second thought I will give a detail about that creep dude, as my example of a deal breaker - I refused to have anything more to do with him after I found out that when he went on vacation and his dog died because his neighbor failed to feed and water it, he disposed of the animals body by putting it in the bin on trash collection day. I don't even like dogs but that is just wrong on so many levels I couldn't deal with it- everything from failure to properly care for the animal or respect it in death, to a complete disrespect for his neighborhoods well being and the trash collectors health, especially considering it was a large breed dog.
This is already rather long but I don't want to leave it on that last note. hrm hum... I can't think of anything else to say that won't carry on for another five paragraphs...
Post here to tell how you feel, or what you think, about people.