The Chuck Chicks Thread

i admit, i was ignorant not to think enough of the hwole process of giving birth, because i thought we were talking about just raw pain. not "morning sickness"

Actually they've done tests with a dolorimeter (I think that's the right word but I'm not sure, it's used to measure pain) that shows being kicked in the balls is as painful as giving birth. The only thing birth pain has going for it that a good ball kicking doesn't is that it's consistent.

ohhh thank you very much, fwaaaaaa

look, have either of you guys ever been shot?

but you still know being shot is painful, right?

and if i, say, said that my menstrual cramps were as painful as being shot, you'd be like, "that's ridiculous." right?

and maybe getting kicked in the balls at the moment of impact is as painful, for a split second, as a single contraction in labor. maybe. if you're kicked with a steel toed boot, maybe. and i know you get nauseous (speaking of morning sickness) and achy after getting kicked in the nads. i know this. but there simply is *no comparison* here. maybe the initial pain of being kicked in the nads. maybe, and even then i doubt it. but it's not hours of constant, continuing pain. maybe, as brock said, if someone kicked you every three minutes and then closer and closer together, and then finally cut open your scrotum and removed one of your nads, maybe.

wholly shit, you think you can get kicked in the balls and just right away after a few minutes be fine??????? ive been kicked so much the theyve twisted up once, the veins (i dotn know what to xcall em but the string things holding the testiculars) got twisted up and i couldnt walk! hell after a good kick your fucked for the day and most probably the following day! you cant walk. boo hoo you throw up a bit and get hungry a lot, nd then and only then your verginer gets stretched maybe 6 inches, yor set after that to have people wade on you hand and foot. a guy, he gets a good shot to the nads you havta fucking deal with it on your own. and you dont get a headache (you feel a bit nautious but that means your gettin better) you get the most retched undescribable pain ever sourcing right int he nuts. your pain is the pain of being stretched, ours is so bad there is no name that can clearly depict how horroible it feels

The bible says that making childbirth painful was meant to punish women, I think it's even more of a punishment to men because while you go through twenty hours of labour we hear about the damned twenty hours of labour our whole lives from every single woman on earth.

And the pain of being kicked in the balls and giving birth are quite different, technically though, since the clitoris has twice as many nerve endings as the testicles a direct kick to it should hurt as much though it's not like it'll pop if you step on it, maybe taking a nailclipper to the clitoris would work to simulate it, and as for men, just jam a football up their ass to simulate birth.

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by zeropointzero [/i]
[B]I'm not even sure how one would quantify pain tolerance. I'm not saying one sex inherently has a higher pain tolerance than the other. I'm saying the reasoning behind any such statement saying otherwise would be silly, ie. women have to survive labor, men are at risk at taking shots to the jewels. [/B][/QUOTE]

Read my posts, insomniacmaniac. Not once did I say getting kicked in the nads is more painful than childbirth. I'm only arguing that it is very painful in it's own right.

Maybe we should just shoot everyone who participates in these conversations in the kneecaps just to get them to shut the fuck up about pain.

now granted women do havta deal more with their pain (which i am only saying to make sure the fucking women dont freak out) but the climax of your boo-hooing, the actual baby coming out doesnt hurt as much as a good, swift, kick to the balls

congratulations, knox, your idiocy has truly left me without words.

you dont even have any proof to that coment, but once again i have turned a once respectable intelligant person, into a bickerring "no-your-dumb" half wit.
infact i dont even know why im having this conversation with you as youve never had a baby and are basing all your information on what youve heard and read. go out and get knocked up, than maybe we'll have this conversation again

ok, i'll get knocked up, and you go get killed doing one of your great little stunts, and then the world will be a better place, b/c i've reproduced, and you've removed yourself from the fucking gene pool.

this just proves the old adage, that it's impossible to have a battle of wits with someone who is unarmed. actually in this case it's more like knox keeps hitting *himself* in the face and being like, "howdya like that, huh?? huh?? come on!!"

just like jack in fight club. are you happy? now that you're just like your little hero?

I don't want to get into a pissing contest here, but I'm going to back Kitty up here. In fact, I'm going to even go as far to say that having a ruptured cyst can be as painful as getting kicked in the balls. I've known girls to go to the hospital for the pain they induce. I've never, ever heard of a guy going to the hospital from the pain of a kick to the balls.

cause we'r enot pussys, a guy gets kicked int he balls he deals with it like a man. unless theres blood or soemthing obviously wrong, you dont go to the hospital.

kitty, keep on posting your only proving me more right that everyone who gets angry at me reduces themselves to being a half-wit.
jack my hero? good one lets result to somehting that no one on the board would like to be associated with, just to get at me. ouch an internet bitch in america is really hurting my feelings through some text, oh woahith me, kitty when your done with the violins send em over my way.

"he deals with it like a man."

oh, you mean by assuming that his pain is the only pain that exists? by trivializing anyone else's, especially women? by talking about labor as "boo hooing" and using the despicable phrase "on the rag?" is that what "dealing with it like a man" means?

or does it mean that it really *isn't* as bad as you make it out to be, and you're just falling back on macho posturing?

the world may never know.

knox, it's good you think i'm proving you right, because you're the only one who thinks so.

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by insomnomaniac [/i]
[B]

knox, it's good you think i'm proving you right, because you're the only one who thinks so. [/B][/QUOTE]

really, funny since this is really only a two person conversation. id like to know these "other" people you are thinking of?

dealing iwth it like a man is not whining and complaining and goign to mommy or the doctor every time you geta bump or bruise. since you are women you dont havta deal with it like a man.
and i meant your boo-hooing, because you are the one making child birth seem a whole lot worse than it is

QUITCHER FUCKIN BITCHING EVERYBODY!

um maybe jane? maybe? and mirkah? on the other thread?

but they're just girls. so they don't count, right?

what you're failing to realize is that you are being a disgusting, sexist fuck, that i'm never going to think or say it's ok, and that the more you try and justify it, the worse it gets. the end.

first off, jane just chymed in with her two cents. second off, mirkah hasnt been in this discussion for the longest time. leaving me and you, granted mirkah did have your back on this one;but she aint her eno more.

if you're going to argue, stick to one point of view. that's kinda how it works, knox.

I think you both need some serious schooling in the ancient art of shutting the fuck up. I want a little recording of Phillip Seymore Hoffman in Punch-Drunk Love playing on a loop.

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by jane s. [/i]
[B]I don't want to get into a pissing contest here, but I'm going to back Kitty up here. In fact, I'm going to even go as far to say that having a ruptured cyst can be as painful as getting kicked in the balls. I've known girls to go to the hospital for the pain they induce. I've never, ever heard of a guy going to the hospital from the pain of a kick to the balls. [/B][/QUOTE]

Are we talking about a cyst on your uterus or something? I would think if a guy had a cyst on his testicle and it ruptured, he'd probably go to the hospital too.

I meant on the ovaries. I hadn't even thought about the uterus. You're damn right he would go to the hospital. If he doesn't he's an idiot, forget about being a man and taking the pain.

The funny thing about this line of conversation is that it's not about the pain so much as it's about the empathy. I'd say that's where the gender difference lies.

As a father, I'd rather be kicked in the balls than even have to go through sitting through the whole birth ordeal with my wife. Seriously, if some entity walked up to me and said, "Well, you can either go to the hospital and do that all over again, or I can kick you in the nuts and your baby will magically appear" I'll take the 2nd option. I'd take the 2nd option at least 5 times in a row before I'd even consider trading places.

I'm dissapointed you kids couldn't resolve this argument on your own, so lets try it my way.
*drags she-man into view*
this, is Toni. Toni wants to be a woman, but before he gets his operation he's agreed to help you lot out. He's agreed to let us kick him in the balls half a dozen times. And then, after he's had his operation, we're gonna get Toni up the duff. Toni will then compare the most painful of his nut kicks to childbirth, and then this whole thing can settle down. Done, and done

[img]http://www.martial-art-shop.com/shop/product_image.php?imageid=44[/img]

The "Macho Female Groin Protector". Cause getting kicked in the pootie-tang hurts too... available at fine martial arts dojo's everywhere...

haha that is TOO funny

This is an appreciation post. For Ellie, Katerina and Konstantina whom i met again today after a loooong time. for the drinks and the laughs and everything we shared tonight and all these years we have been friends. Yay for girls!

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by lupus [/i]
[B]This is an appreciation post. For Ellie, Katerina and Konstantina whom i met again today after a loooong time. for the drinks and the laughs and everything we shared tonight and all these years we have been friends. Yay for girls! [/B][/QUOTE]

Just reading this post had me feeling downright communist... in some sort of Cold War/Alexander Nevsky/ Anna Karenina/ Milan Kundera/ Neo-fascist/ Wall-Falling/ Sociologically-Polish/ Current Sexual Revolution/ Budapestian Anglophile sort-of-way... I'm assuming this feeling I generated had something to do with Katerina and Konstantina, foxy-K's I imagine them to be in a Rasputin-ish Mad Monk/ Dr. Zhivagonian/ Mr. X/ Stolichnaya/ Czar-ish Princess/ Religious Iconoclast/ Red Army-funkadelimentiaphonic swerve... Thanks for the glasnost, feral la femme hirsute...

I guess Ellie didn't do much for me... too Deliverance-sounding for me...

But you know the names are Greek, right? The Russians also being Christian Orthodox share lots of our names as they are or slightly altered (Dimitrios->Dmitri etc)
Ellie is sort for Eleftheria, meaning Freedom (or Liberty?)

So the glasnost/communist connotations were purely unintentional...

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by lupus [/i]
[B]
So the glasnost/communist connotations were purely unintentional... [/B][/QUOTE]

I know this and you know this. Try telling my libido this...

I can see it already. A aviator puppet of Brock's libido talking to Brock and trying to explain. I set myself up...

If that is any consolation to you, Konstantina is indeed a fair-skinned, blue-eyed, blonde beauty.

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by lupus [/i]
[B]If that is any consolation to you, Konstantina is indeed a fair-skinned, blue-eyed, blonde beauty. [/B][/QUOTE]

Cool... One day a handsome Brock went riding out by the witches castle. He passed by the tallest tower and heard a lot of cracking whips and screaming. Figuring it was a blonde russian-greek princess chick named Konstantina, he decided to "save" her...

But as he got closer to the castle, he could find no way to enter it and save the young damsel in distress. So he got beneath the only window of the tallest tower and he called out, "Konstantina, Konstantina let down your hair." (For somehow he knew that her name and the fact that she had very long braided hair.)

Just then the whipping sounds stopped and Konstantina's long braid tumbled down to the ground. The young handsome and dashing Brock wasted no time scrambling up to "save" her, so to speak...

When Brock reached the window he immediately wished he'd just stayed in bed that morning. "What are you doing here?" demanded the evil bitch-witch, "You're interrupting our fun. We were right in the middle of kinky love-making and you just had to go and ruin the moment didn't you?"

"W-w-well I-I-I was just t-trying to s-save..." stammered the tongue tied young Brock...

"Save who? Me?" exclaimed an astounded Konstantina, as she removed the furry handcuffs that had previously bound her to the wall...

"Do I really look like I need saving? What were you thinking? Did you really think I was some bubble-headed damsel in distress who needed to be rescued? Furthermore, did you really expect me to fuck you?! We're lesbians!"

Stunned the young Brock fell off the whip made out of Konstantina's hair and rode back to his father's castle in pain from the fall and his blue balls and blinded from the sights he witnessed in the tallest tower... THE END

Oh, and because this IS a Chick Thread. Ladies, today I had my hair dyed and cut. I am a lovely short-haired brunette now. I thought I was in for an existential shock after being a redhead for all those years, but I like it so much, I can't stop being stupidly vain and looking into every polished surface to see my reeflection. Talk about narcissism (I WILL avoid ponds/lochs/sea however)...

Brock... How on earth did you know about the furry handcuffs? This is uncanny.

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by lupus [/i]
[B]Brock... How on earth did you know about the furry handcuffs? This is uncanny. [/B][/QUOTE]

... because everyone knows all blonde, Greek, fair-skinned, blue-eyed women named Konstantina own a pair of furry handcuffs. It's par for the course...

Oh. Well. Um. She doesn't.

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by lupus [/i]
[B]Oh. Well. Um. She doesn't. [/B][/QUOTE]

How do you know? You don't.. not really. Have you asked her specifically? No. If so, why would you ask her such a question? More importantly, does she know about your furry handcuffs? No.

i do know. Really. Why wouldn't i ask her such a question? I should know about my friends' sex toys in case i wanted to borrow (the kind that can be borrowed, like furry handcuffs).
Of course she knows about mine. All my friends do.

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by lupus [/i]
[B]i do know. Really. Why wouldn't i ask her such a question? I should know about my friends' sex toys in case i wanted to borrow (the kind that can be borrowed, like furry handcuffs).
Of course she knows about mine. All my friends do. [/B][/QUOTE]

Well then. Either you are a very socially-inept woman with no sense of drawing personal boundaries OR a young lady who is into other young ladies OR an intellectually enlightened sycophant with a penchant for hairy restraining devices OR someone who compulsively asks all of her friends, and strangers on the street, if they have furry handcuffs as she hoards them in her furry handcuff closet OR a fat balding chronic masturbating man who likes to pretend to be a scottish lass who is fluent in greek and likes flirting with other men over the internet as well as pretending to know whether or not the imaginary blonde haired friend he made up has furry handcuffs or not OR?

Unbreakable Union of freeborn Republics,
Great Russia has welded forver to stand.
Created in struggle by will of the people,
United and mighty, our Soviet land!

Sing to the Motherland, home of the free,
Bulwark of peoples in brotherhood strong.
O Party of Lenin, the stength of the people,
To Communism's triumph lead us on!

Through tempests the sunrays of freedom have cheered us,
Along the new path where great Lenin did lead.
To a righteous cause he raised up the peoples,
Inspired them to labour and valourous deed.

Sing to the Motherland, home of the free,
Bulwark of peoples in brotherhood strong.
O Party of Lenin, the stength of the people,
To Communism's triumph lead us on!

In the vict'ry of Communism's immortal ideal,
We see the future of our dear land.
And to her fluttering scarlet banner,
Selflessly true we always shall stand!

Sing to the Motherland, home of the free,
Bulwark of peoples in brotherhood strong.
O Party of Lenin, the stength of the people,
To Communism's triumph lead us on!

For a person of your intellect you managed to be amusingly wrong in everything. But I think you were just [I]playing[/I] stupid. Particularly enjoyed the being a man bit, however.

Satanic Ooze, very poor attempt at highjacking.

If I had a company like Al Quaida or anything like it I would hijack 20 superatankers and take them all to Hudson River (or whatever river splits the New York, I think it's Hudson River anyway). Fill them all with dynamite and wonder what Bush would think.

You're gay. Brock rocks. the end.

anyway, on a lighter note, have any of you girlies got/heard of the GHD hair straighteners? i'm getting some soon because they are soooooo good, especially for frizz-balls like me - my hair is super-sleek after use!

Ruby, where did you buy the GHD stuff? What company puts it out? Do you know if you can buy it in the states? I'm always trying to find a good anti-frizz product but usually they make my hair all gunky.

the make is GHD (Good Hair Day - how corny is that?!) and they're hair straightening tongy things that i used, but they've just bought out a whole loada products. methinks they're available in the USA. god look me pretending to be an advert!

here's some info [url]http://www.hqhair.com/default.asp?TargetURL=http%3A//www.hqhair.com/code/products.asp%3FPageID%3D208%26MenuID207[/url]

but just get the GHDs! all the other ones are shit and rip-offs

Thanks sweetie. Wow, that site makes me wish I remembered how many pounds to the dollar and stuff.

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by knoxville [/i]
[B]its only too girly if you move your hands a lot[/B][/QUOTE]

i was just looking through this thread and i found this hilarious. gonna sig y aone i'm 'fraid knox