the bad jokes thread
it looks like joe frazier died today. and it seems that ali is understandably shaken up by it.
(rip to a legend)
okay. may your poor jokes commence..
__________________________________
play hard, like it's work to be done.
who here drinks from the red river ??
__________________________________
play hard, like it's work to be done.
What do you say to a black man in a suit?
Nothing, because he is in a coffin, having died young of heart disease.
Nothing, because he is in a coffin, having died young of heart disease.
Don't be rascicle he could be going to court too, you never know.
“The man of knowledge must be able not only to love his enemies but also to hate his friends.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche
Nothing, because he is in a coffin, having died young of heart disease.
Don't be rascicle he could be going to court too, you never know.
If they are sending a dead man to court then the judicial system really is unfair to black folk!
Nothing, because he is in a coffin, having died young of heart disease.
Don't be rascicle he could be going to court too, you never know.
If they are sending a dead man to court then the judicial system really is unfair to black folk!
Not if they gave him life....
“The man of knowledge must be able not only to love his enemies but also to hate his friends.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche
Let me balance the racism:
What's white and 14 inches?
Nothing.
You know how I get my wiener to 14 inches? Fold it in half!!
A woman walks into a bar, and asks the bartender for a beer.
Bartender: What would you like.
Woman: Any beer.
Bartender: anheuser busch, ok?
Woman: Fine, and hows your penis?
Its really better if told to get re beer slurred right.
“The man of knowledge must be able not only to love his enemies but also to hate his friends.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche
(The following joke has to be spoken to be fully appreciated right away so please read aloud.)
What's the difference between Batman and Blackman?
Batman can go without Robin.
What's the difference between Batman and Blackman?
Batman can go without Robin.
I made the most awkward(white girl sounding)laugh ever in my life
Oh snap I'm racist
Nothing, because he is in a coffin, having died young of heart disease.
Don't be rascicle he could be going to court too, you never know.
If they are sending a dead man to court then the judicial system really is unfair to black folk!
Not if they gave him life....
laughing my face off !!
__________________________________
play hard, like it's work to be done.
i told this joke about four years ago..
there was a little girl and her mother walking through the park one day and they saw two teenagers making out on a bench.
the little girl says, "mummy, what are they doing?" the mother hesitates then quickly says they're making cakes.
walking out of the park, they pass two men making out on a blanket. they were groping and being loud so the little girl points at them and asks her mom if they're making cakes. mom grabs at her hand, says yes, and walks them both out of the park.
The next morning, the girl asks, "Mummy, were you and Daddy making cakes in the living room last night?" Shocked, the mother asks how she knew.
Because I licked the icing off the sofa.
__________________________________
play hard, like it's work to be done.
That was a REALLY dumb kid though. No sympathy.
I was horrified at the end of that joke kabol. Thank god I never liked icing
"icing" icing or like for real icing?
Real icing and I couldn't tell you about "icing" icing because well I've never tried it....wait is this a trap Nate?
How can you not like icing? It's the entire point of cake.
I know, ha ha ha...
Well I never really liked cake and I'll stop there because anything I follow-up with will turn into a really really bad joke
Pound cake.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
Well I think cake is hit or miss. It's either awesome or it's terrible and you only accept a slice to be polite. Also, I don't really understand most people's attitudes toward it. They have a sheeplike devotion to its greatness but then only eat it on special occasions? Cookies are probably just as bad (healthwise) and sometimes a whole lot better tasting and there's nothing sacred about those. I don't know. Stupid cake.
More into baklava Jaz?
"I call cakes, big ol' cookies." - Tom Haverford
OMG
I call noodles, long ass rice.
I call eggs pre-birds or future birds.
Tortillas are bean blankies.
TomHaverfoods.com is probably my favorite website on the internet.
More into baklava Jaz?
;)
Only Cult Baklava
This is how I feel about myself right now.
I think Parks and Recreation is so underrated. So many great characters.
Nothing, because he is in a coffin, having died young of heart disease.
Don't be rascicle he could be going to court too, you never know.
If they are sending a dead man to court then the judicial system really is unfair to black folk!
Not if they gave him life....
Hehehehe.
"I'm glad I live in the GPS era. In a different century, I would've set off to visit the other side of the village and wandered off into the mountains and been eaten by a carnivorous plant. Or discovered the Americas."
-LaJessica
a black guy was praying when god one day decided to answer him.
Lord, why are my legs so long?
So you can run like the wind through the jungle.
Lord, why is my hair so kinky?
So it won't get caught on anything as you run between the trees of the jungle.
Lord, why is my skin so dark?
So your skin won't burn by the sun while running through the jungle.
Lord, why am I in Chicago?
__________________________________
play hard, like it's work to be done.
So true. It's even better now that Adam Scott is on. He's one of my favorite actors. It's a shame that Party Down had to die though.
"Chicken parm is chickie-chickie parm-parm."
"A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism." -Carl Sagan
"Am I cruel? Probably. Is she an idiot? Yes." -jane s.
"Food rakes!"
okay, i heard one tonight that a few of my friends wouldnt so much like..
you hear about the black dude who died yesterday on hw 167 ?
he stuck his head out of the window going ninety. his lips beat him to death.
__________________________________
play hard, like it's work to be done.
ha !!
jen wants to make an ebonics app for siri. she jotted down some ideas that were pretty funny, but i have no idea where they are. ill have to ask her about it later tonight.
have some dear jokes, though. (she loves these, she actually tells them at parties..)
what do you call a dear with no eyes?
no eyed-dear (pronounced i-dear, consider these verbal jokes)
what do you call a dear with no eyes and no legs?
still no i-dear
what do you call a dear with glasses?
a good i-dear
__________________________________
play hard, like it's work to be done.
Deer.
And what or who is siri?
"I'm glad I live in the GPS era. In a different century, I would've set off to visit the other side of the village and wandered off into the mountains and been eaten by a carnivorous plant. Or discovered the Americas."
-LaJessica
Nice one
oh, dear 
__________________________________
play hard, like it's work to be done.
I say: what's the opposite of Christopher Reeve?
You say: Christopher Walken
I say: no, Christopher Livingston.
"I'm glad I live in the GPS era. In a different century, I would've set off to visit the other side of the village and wandered off into the mountains and been eaten by a carnivorous plant. Or discovered the Americas."
-LaJessica
let me slip into something more comatose
“if you want to be a bird,” you said once, “with colorful plumage and buoyant trills, you must also be ready for hollow bones."
what do you call a dear with glasses?
a good i-dear
Wouldn't that be a Bad eye deer?
what do you call a dear with glasses?
a good i-dear
Wouldn't that be a Bad eye deer?
instantrimshot.com
Wasn't meant as a joke. A person with bad eyes would wear glasses. A good eye deer wouldn't need glasses.
Proteinpowder slays me every time.
This is why we can't have nice things.
Andy Rooney wasn't on 60 Minutes on Sunday...
Because he retired a few weeks back!