Say Goodbye (and move on)
- Goodbye almost 5 year relationship. You had your highs and your lows. I got the 2 best beings in my life out of you.
- Farewell fast(ish) metabolism. I was just starting to like you.
- So long Roasted Red Pepper Hummus. I would've enjoyed more of you had my ex not devoured you without my knowledge.
- Bye-bye favorite pair of jeans. It's not you, it's me.
- Toodaloo warm weather. I promise we'll meet again soon.
- Peace out sex life. I don't need you right now, but I'd love to meet up again eventually.
"We're developing a new citizenry. One that will be very selective about cereals and automobiles, but won't be able to think."
— Rod Serling
"Chuck calls Noah fortnightly on his bakelite rotary phone and gives him publisher's insider information and stock tips."- Tuffy
- Goodbye Four Year Old iPod. You were one of the first nice things I bought with my own money and I haven't seen you in almost a month. I've accepted that you are not under anyone's bed or inside anyone's car. I will wait an appropriate amount of time before finally getting a newer, better, possibly phone call making version of you. I know you would've wanted me to be happy.
- Rest in peace, Last Year's Backpack. You owned the fact that you were a backpack but didn't make me look like a middle schooler. You let me put all my things inside you. That was special. I'm sorry I started leaving you on the floor. I should've gotten you in a darker color.
- You can suck it, Squeaky Bed Frame. I hope you rust in a junkyard.
(I'll say it now even though my boot camp is in a few months):
- Good bye freedom, family, and happiness, you know I love you lots, but when Uncle Sam says to run forever, I have to run forever.
- Good Bye old body, I'll be able to bench you when the summer is over!!
- Good Bye old body, I'll be able to bench you when the summer is over!!
I chuckled. Luck.
Tuffy the Dump Truck may rarely increase the risk of a heart attack or stroke. The risk may be greater if you have heart disease or increased risk for heart disease (for example, due to smoking, family history of heart disease, or conditions such as high blood pressure or diabetes), or with longer use. Tuffy should not be taken right before or after heart bypass surgery. Also, Tuffy may infrequently cause serious (rarely fatal) bleeding from the stomach or intestines. This effect can occur without warning symptoms at any time while taking Tuffy. Older adults may be at higher risk for this effect. (See also Precautions and Drug Interactions sections.) Stop taking Tuffy and get medical help right away if you notice any of the following rare but serious side effects: bloody or black/tarry stools, persistent stomach/abdominal pain, vomit that looks like coffee grounds, chest/jaw/left arm pain, shortness of breath, unusual sweating, weakness on one side of the body, sudden vision changes, slurred speech. Ask your doctor if Tuffy is right for you.
I love this.
It also reminds me...
Good riddance water tubes. My bed is significantly less noisy without you. There may not be as much cushion to my mattress, but I promise that I'm happier without you.
"We're developing a new citizenry. One that will be very selective about cereals and automobiles, but won't be able to think."
— Rod Serling
"Chuck calls Noah fortnightly on his bakelite rotary phone and gives him publisher's insider information and stock tips."- Tuffy
Noisy beds make me want to kill a little bit so I'm happy for you.
As much as I don't want to admit it, my bed hasn't been making much noise as of late. Maybe I'll be able to say good bye to that sooner than later.
Goodbye car that's been sitting in my driveway for over a year. We had some good times of you almost killing me. You've made a great resting place for cats and raccoons, but more importantly you got me to school. I can't say I'm going to miss you. You were very temperamental, always overheating,flooding inside yourself if it rained, and insisting on having flat tires. I bid you Adieu, forever.
goodbye social life, love life, leisure life
hello most ridiculous classes ever WHY IS JUNIOR YEAR SO AWFUL
“if you want to be a bird,” you said once, “with colorful plumage and buoyant trills, you must also be ready for hollow bones."
So long hopeful feelings. You had me believing I wouldn't have to rely on anyone financially soon enough, but it was all a bunch of lies! What a stinker.
"We're developing a new citizenry. One that will be very selective about cereals and automobiles, but won't be able to think."
— Rod Serling
"Chuck calls Noah fortnightly on his bakelite rotary phone and gives him publisher's insider information and stock tips."- Tuffy
Goodbye, saying goodbye...I'm never parting with anything ever again!
Goodbye good night's sleep. See you in a few years, if I'm lucky.
Goodnight!
Wait, not yet. You've got 3 more months.
Good bye, 5-week-old Christmas tree. You have been spewing an unimaginable amount of needles all over my living room. You are a deadbeat.
Good bye, that 45 minutes of my life. It took me all of you to clean up those fucking needles.
"A celibate clergy is an especially good idea, because it tends to suppress any hereditary propensity toward fanaticism." -Carl Sagan
"Am I cruel? Probably. Is she an idiot? Yes." -jane s.
Goodbye IKEA plant.
I am sorry I neglected you for so long. If you could only speak...perhaps I would've heard your screams.
I am sorry I neglected you for so long. If you could only speak...perhaps I would've heard your screams.
That got surprisingly dark.
You know in all the years I've been here I've never been sigged?
I imagined the plant bleeding with its nonexistent blood out of its nonexistent eyes.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
What kind of plant was IKEA Plant? So I know what I'm feeling sorry for here.
Wait, not yet. You've got 3 more months.
Doubtful. Baby belly makes turning in sleep fuuuuuuunn. Wake up, take about 5 minutes to maneuver to other side, 15 minutes later wake up again because that side hurts, turn to other side in about 10 minutes, wake up 30 minutes later because your bladder is about to burst, etc...
"We're developing a new citizenry. One that will be very selective about cereals and automobiles, but won't be able to think."
— Rod Serling
"Chuck calls Noah fortnightly on his bakelite rotary phone and gives him publisher's insider information and stock tips."- Tuffy
Wait, not yet. You've got 3 more months.
Doubtful. Baby belly makes turning in sleep fuuuuuuunn. Wake up, take about 5 minutes to maneuver to other side, 15 minutes later wake up again because that side hurts, turn to other side in about 10 minutes, wake up 30 minutes later because your bladder is about to burst, etc...
Yes! This!
I have to sleep with a pillow between my legs because my hips get achey. Usually my most comfortable side is my left side to sleep on, but that's the side I get the pain on in my ribs, so if I lie on that side it's like my ribs are breaking. So I go to sleep on my right side, then move to my left side in my sleep, then wake up as I'm doing this because the pillow between my legs is doing funny things, then sleep. Then wake up because it hurts to sleep on that side. Move back to the right side, fixing the pillow again. Finally get back to sleep. Then I wake up needing to pee. Oh the joy!
Wait, not yet. You've got 3 more months.
Doubtful. Baby belly makes turning in sleep fuuuuuuunn. Wake up, take about 5 minutes to maneuver to other side, 15 minutes later wake up again because that side hurts, turn to other side in about 10 minutes, wake up 30 minutes later because your bladder is about to burst, etc...
Yes! This!
I have to sleep with a pillow between my legs because my hips get achey. Usually my most comfortable side is my left side to sleep on, but that's the side I get the pain on in my ribs, so if I lie on that side it's like my ribs are breaking. So I go to sleep on my right side, then move to my left side in my sleep, then wake up as I'm doing this because the pillow between my legs is doing funny things, then sleep. Then wake up because it hurts to sleep on that side. Move back to the right side, fixing the pillow again. Finally get back to sleep. Then I wake up needing to pee. Oh the joy!
It's good that your left side is the most comfortable, because that's the side that's beneficial to you and the baby. 
I was happy that I was originally a side sleeper, otherwise I probably wouldn't have gotten any sleep!
Oh, and so long great bladder control! (of course, with kegels, you can go back to nearly normal, but never completely...)
"We're developing a new citizenry. One that will be very selective about cereals and automobiles, but won't be able to think."
— Rod Serling
"Chuck calls Noah fortnightly on his bakelite rotary phone and gives him publisher's insider information and stock tips."- Tuffy
Goodbye Megaupload....
Guess I'll find other sources to acquire my tv shows from...
Goodbye low self-esteem. Please, be a stranger.
Goodbye, super long hair.
Goodbye Cult.
WTH?
Goodbye lazy days, I now have to study hard to make sure I can say goodbye Romania at some point this year.
It seemed a funny thing to say in my head.
Embarassingly, I don't know. I think that was part of the problem - I never understood it
GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD
“if you want to be a bird,” you said once, “with colorful plumage and buoyant trills, you must also be ready for hollow bones."
Guess I'll find other sources to acquire my tv shows from...
Helloooo Pirate Bay.
What kind of cut are you getting? POIDH
"We're developing a new citizenry. One that will be very selective about cereals and automobiles, but won't be able to think."
— Rod Serling
"Chuck calls Noah fortnightly on his bakelite rotary phone and gives him publisher's insider information and stock tips."- Tuffy
Guess I'll find other sources to acquire my tv shows from...
Check out rlsbb.
Guess I'll find other sources to acquire my tv shows from...
Helloooo Pirate Bay.
What kind of cut are you getting? POIDH
I had some layers added and about five inches cut off. So...that means it's like an inch past my shoulders now. I like it, but I might grow it out again. I'm too lazy to take pictures!
- I cling to people from whom I get nothing in return. I have several claimed friendships into which no effort is put by the other person. I try to start conversations and am ignored outright or receive one-word replies. Send a note and hear nothing in return. Initiate contact and get the brush-off... Yeah, I'm busy too, but at least I tried. Well, I give up. I feel like an In-Real-Life MySpace friend; remember those? Someone who added to your total Friend Count but served no other purpose.
I'm finally done with those people. I don't want or need them any more than they do me. Buh-bye.
Tuffy the Dump Truck may rarely increase the risk of a heart attack or stroke. The risk may be greater if you have heart disease or increased risk for heart disease (for example, due to smoking, family history of heart disease, or conditions such as high blood pressure or diabetes), or with longer use. Tuffy should not be taken right before or after heart bypass surgery. Also, Tuffy may infrequently cause serious (rarely fatal) bleeding from the stomach or intestines. This effect can occur without warning symptoms at any time while taking Tuffy. Older adults may be at higher risk for this effect. (See also Precautions and Drug Interactions sections.) Stop taking Tuffy and get medical help right away if you notice any of the following rare but serious side effects: bloody or black/tarry stools, persistent stomach/abdominal pain, vomit that looks like coffee grounds, chest/jaw/left arm pain, shortness of breath, unusual sweating, weakness on one side of the body, sudden vision changes, slurred speech. Ask your doctor if Tuffy is right for you.
Their Loss.
Guess I'll find other sources to acquire my tv shows from...
Helloooo Pirate Bay.
What kind of cut are you getting? POIDH
I had some layers added and about five inches cut off. So...that means it's like an inch past my shoulders now. I like it, but I might grow it out again. I'm too lazy to take pictures!
I want to say goodbye to my hair but I'm doing my best at growing it out long. I've already trimmed my hair 3 times but the length is starting to get to me.
It got to me too. I mean, it was ridiculous. I kept getting it caught in things like the car door, couch cushions, Drew's armpit while cuddling, you name it.
Same here. I'm so tired of it and the only reason I'm putting off cutting it is because I need a professional to cut it and I'm broke. I'm still looking at styles too.
"We're developing a new citizenry. One that will be very selective about cereals and automobiles, but won't be able to think."
— Rod Serling
"Chuck calls Noah fortnightly on his bakelite rotary phone and gives him publisher's insider information and stock tips."- Tuffy
I've been trying not trim my hair for this very reason but the way my hair is when it's all one length it starts to rat up and tangle...I literally was starting to get a dread in my hair within the course of a day. So I caved in and trimmed it which has helped but I still need a professional cut.
this is funny btw and true
Hah! Those hair problems sound hilarious to me. The car door?! COUCH CUSHIONS?! I would love to see those things happen. The armpit problem is not hard to imagine.
I miss armpit cuddling. 
Tuffy the Dump Truck may rarely increase the risk of a heart attack or stroke. The risk may be greater if you have heart disease or increased risk for heart disease (for example, due to smoking, family history of heart disease, or conditions such as high blood pressure or diabetes), or with longer use. Tuffy should not be taken right before or after heart bypass surgery. Also, Tuffy may infrequently cause serious (rarely fatal) bleeding from the stomach or intestines. This effect can occur without warning symptoms at any time while taking Tuffy. Older adults may be at higher risk for this effect. (See also Precautions and Drug Interactions sections.) Stop taking Tuffy and get medical help right away if you notice any of the following rare but serious side effects: bloody or black/tarry stools, persistent stomach/abdominal pain, vomit that looks like coffee grounds, chest/jaw/left arm pain, shortness of breath, unusual sweating, weakness on one side of the body, sudden vision changes, slurred speech. Ask your doctor if Tuffy is right for you.
Honestly, I doubt they'll even notice.
Tuffy the Dump Truck may rarely increase the risk of a heart attack or stroke. The risk may be greater if you have heart disease or increased risk for heart disease (for example, due to smoking, family history of heart disease, or conditions such as high blood pressure or diabetes), or with longer use. Tuffy should not be taken right before or after heart bypass surgery. Also, Tuffy may infrequently cause serious (rarely fatal) bleeding from the stomach or intestines. This effect can occur without warning symptoms at any time while taking Tuffy. Older adults may be at higher risk for this effect. (See also Precautions and Drug Interactions sections.) Stop taking Tuffy and get medical help right away if you notice any of the following rare but serious side effects: bloody or black/tarry stools, persistent stomach/abdominal pain, vomit that looks like coffee grounds, chest/jaw/left arm pain, shortness of breath, unusual sweating, weakness on one side of the body, sudden vision changes, slurred speech. Ask your doctor if Tuffy is right for you.
Goodbye Useless Junk!
The chaos you bring is no longer necessary.
Goodbye social life(not that I had much of one).
Goodbye leisure reading.
Goodbye television.
Goodbye internets.
^This.
I'll still be on the Internet.
Yeah, I'll still be on the internets here and there mostly for school and paying bills though.
