public toilets?
Rents, you are one suave motherfucker.
There is hope, but not for us.
I know. The "wash your damn hands" line gets 'em everytime. Hook, line, and sinker.
Every time?
This has happened more than once?
Never get so attached to a poem you forget truth that lacks lyricism.
It would get me, that's for damn sure. I would totally be your bitch after that. I can't believe it didn't work out between the two of you.
There is hope, but not for us.
Every...time. It's amazing. Try it next time you see a hottie across the bar.
Jane, the reason it didn't work out is 'cause she opened her damn mouth. Things are great until girls start to talk and I realize that intelligence just isn't there. That's why you shouldn't base any kind of relationship on looks alone. Most people are stupid.
Agreed. Unless you're saying all girls are dumb. Then disagreed.
But how am I supposed to use THAT on someone across a bar? Following a woman into the bathroom usually precludes any use of a pick up line.
Never get so attached to a poem you forget truth that lacks lyricism.
I didn't realize you could get salmonella from someone not washing their hands. Maybe after touching something it comes from (raw chicken, i have no idea where it comes from)
But the reason why I don't freak out in the bathroom over everything is because we all have an immune system. I'll touch a handle, I'm not going to die. Immune systems need a good workout sometimes or they won't be able to handle a germ when you end up getting one.
I'm kinda in the middle of moe and Kitty. It's nasty if you get something on you from someone else, but I think most of it is just the idea of it that's nasty.
It comes from raw chicken, eggs, not bathroom junk. There are all sorts of things that can come from an ass or improperly washed dumbstick/ crotch, but not salmonella. Of course, I wouldn't be shocked to find it in a bathroom.
Never get so attached to a poem you forget truth that lacks lyricism.
Well, salmonella can come from the bathroom if someone else is recovering from the disease, which is the only viable option for where I could've gotten it.
And it's easy to use the line in a bar setting. You just wait for a girl to come out of the bathroom, and then you yell at her. Everyone will look at you, then look at her, then she'll fall in love with you for drawing so much attention to her beautiful face.
Right.
I'm seeing that as another vignette on an already lengthy police report.
Never get so attached to a poem you forget truth that lacks lyricism.
Would it work for a guy though? Could I tell a guy this line and have him fall desperately in love with me? And were you insulting all girls in general or just this one particular girl?
There is hope, but not for us.
If it's the former, then...fists of death, man. Fists. Of. Death.
There is hope, but not for us.
Most girls that I've been interested in. Not all girls. Not one girl. Only one's that I've encountered.
And I'm not sure if it would work for a guy. Try it and tell us how it works out.
I think if some girl just popped up out of nowhere in the guys room while I was peeing and demanded I wash my hands I'd immediately jump to the conclusions: hooker, glory holes, anonymous sex, unsafe, dirty, dirty, dirty.
I'd wash my hands and slowly back out the door.
But maybe that's just me.
Never get so attached to a poem you forget truth that lacks lyricism.
Yeah, don't think I'll be trying it any time soon, no offense or anything.
There is hope, but not for us.
*look of shock* How dare you not use my spurious pick up line! *takes off his glove and slaps Jane with it* You have brought dishonor to my family. I feel it is my duty to return this honor to my name. I challenge you to a duel.
*slaps Rents back with her own glove* I accept your challenge, you miscreant! We shall meet in the town square at twelve o'clock under the courthouse clock. A duel...to the death.
There is hope, but not for us.
Very well. If I were thou, I would leave thy sammich-constructing servants at home. I gots a lead sammich for you's already. Unless we shall be dueling with swords, in which case thou shalt taste my blade in time. Good day.
Taste my blade, you skaggy bitch. *stabs him totally unfairly*
There is hope, but not for us.
Test my blade, you skaggy bitch.
Isn't that in Othello?
Never get so attached to a poem you forget truth that lacks lyricism.
Yeah, it's in the part where Desdemona comes back from the dead and kills Othello.
Wouldn't that have been a better ending?
There is hope, but not for us.
Yeah, I think it's about time someone spruces up The Bard's works.
MacBeth EXTREME
Romeo and Juliet (NC-17)
Othello (Rise of the Dead)
Hamlet (Ophelia's Revenge)
Merchant of Venice (It's about Venice beach drug dealers)
Henry VIII Rapes EVERYONE (starring Nick Nolte)
Never get so attached to a poem you forget truth that lacks lyricism.
lol. good stuff, proto. how about some dialogue.
[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by jane s. [/i]
[B]Taste my blade, you skaggy bitch. *stabs him totally unfairly* [/B][/QUOTE]
Jane...How could you do this to me? *starts swaying as the light gets closer* I...I'm dying Jane. I'm dying. Come closer. There's something I want to tell you...Come Jane....*Jane bends close to hear what Rents has to say* Joo...sock....*dies*
Oh man.
*spits on his corpse*
There is hope, but not for us.
*Comes back from the dead and stabs Jane repeatedly with his sword* I ween. Joo loose.
let's face it, folks, public toilet suck the big rubbery one.
They're ok if you're drunk.
The cool of tile floors in wonderful when you're blasted.
I once gave myself a swirlie in a bar bathroom when I was really zooted because it felt so good. The next day I wanted to shave my head I was so grossed out.
But it made sense at the time.
Never get so attached to a poem you forget truth that lacks lyricism.
most things are ok when you're drunk, especially jizz popsicles.
That'd be an achievement.
Never get so attached to a poem you forget truth that lacks lyricism.
getting drunk
or
consuming jizz popsicles
MAKING jizz popsicles. I'd have to save up for six months to make one, I think.
Never get so attached to a poem you forget truth that lacks lyricism.
On second thought, I can't believe I'm having this discussion.
Never get so attached to a poem you forget truth that lacks lyricism.
[QUOTE]Right.
I'm seeing that as another vignette on an already lengthy police report.[/QUOTE]
prototype is going to set a new record on the best posts thread.
[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]
[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]
I gotta side with Moe on this debate. The whole reason I spent an agonizing week on the pot with Salmonella poisoning is because somebody down at the coffee shop didn't know how to wash their hands properly. I wash my hands every time I go, whether I'm 1in' it or 2in' it.
This also reminds me of a story. We're having the last party of the year in my room last year and it's pretty big. We've got 30+ people crammed in my room. The girls' bathrooms need keys and not every girl there has a key to get in, so the guys' bathroom becomes a co-ed bathroom. One of my roommates and I are taking a piss at the urinals when a toilet flushes behind us and a girl comes out, keeping her head low and heading straight for the door. A little less than sober, my roommate and I both lean back and at the same time yell at her, "Wash your hands!" Her head whips around to look at us, still draining our lizards, and says,"I thought you'd just want me to leave. Sorry." "No," I say with a smile," we want you to wash your damn hands." Got her phone number later. Didn't work out though.