public toilets?

Public toilets vary so much... some times I seen one and go, 'Yeah, aint that bad...' and other times I nearly run screaming.

For example, most of the toilets in Canberra... they have automatic sliding doors, are (yes, no kidding) self-cleaning, and if memory serves even [i]talk[/i] to you if you've been in there too long.

haha wow Rohan i wanna go to Canberra now!!

dudes are lucky. they can stand up. we have SiT on these gross things

there are sites dedicated to this..
trying to find the link..

but here's one
[url]http://www.cromwell-intl.com/toilet/[/url]

i would love to go to the ones in europe..i heard it's really high tech..in japan too...they cost so much money and are really super toilets..they clean your butt etc etc so you dont ever need toilet paper etc etc

damn..i cant find that urinals from around the world link..i might have bookmarked it on my compu...which i missed dearly..will be back home with my baby in a week (still in taiwan)

speaking of standing..

[url]http://www.restrooms.org/standing.html[/url]
how to pee standing up...a guide for chicks

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by The Gucci Ghost [/i]
[B]its not possible for me to do anything but a #1 in public. [/B]
[/QUOTE]

A #1, hmm. Thats pretty damn euphemistic sweetie. C'mon say it it! PEE PEE!

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by origamiLips [/i]
[B]i would love to go to the ones in europe..i heard it's really high tech..in japan too...they cost so much money and are really super toilets..they clean your butt etc etc so you dont ever need toilet paper etc etc [/B][/QUOTE]

I have nightmares about some--very few--of the toilets in Europe.

As for the toilets in Japan, yeah, they do have the superfreaky high tech ones that -actually talk to you-, with these cool little fountains and jets and stuff (a different kind of jet for men and for women ) but they also have the really primitive kinds, the ones you were talking about where you just have to squat and it's a porcelin pot on the floor. Also a lot of public toilets in Japan don't come equipped with toilet paper, so you have to carry around your own tissues at all times.

What's travel sick?

Usually bathrooms are okay. As long as I can't see what's there it doesn't bother me...we have immune systems. Ya know the stereotype of guys never cleaning their bathrooms, and girls are therefore cleaner? Why is it then, that I walk into a bookstore's bathroom, find two toilets w/ crap in them, one w/ pee in it, and the last one w/ pee on the freakin seat! Girls can be really nasty here.

Concerts are the worst though...that's when I wish I was a guy for about 90 seconds so I could stand up.

There are these newer toilets they put at like malls and movie theaters here........you don't flush them, they "automatically" flush when you walk away. Right. I spend five minutes every time trying to get the thing to flush, waving my hand in front of the sensor. Stupid idea.

girls, i've got 2 words: squat and hover.

[url]http://shtick.org/Misc/ryans.htm[/url]

the french have a great word for public toilets . . . only i've forgotten what it is. it's a long "vee" word, though. aidez moi, s'il vous plait.

bah...i can't think of it, fram. i keep thinking wc.

vespasienne

i had to look it up. je suis desolee

I used to have a problem with public toilets until I came to college. Now my bathroom pretty much is a public restroom and I can go just about anywhere. Most unfortunately, I've even had to re-enact the Trainspotting sequence, without the diving into the bowl. Impressed?

- Nasty Things to Do in a Public Toilet...

Stick your palm open under the stall wall and ask your neighbor,"May
I borrow a highlighter?"

Say "Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't put my lips on that."

Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a
bodily function noise

Say, "Hmmm, I've never seen that color before."

Drop a marble and say, "Oh shoot!! My glass eye!!"

Say "Darn, this water is cold."

Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantaloupe
into the toilet bowl from a high place and sigh. Sigh relaxingly.

Say, "Now how did that get there?"

Say, "Humus. Reminds me of humus."

Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the
stall walls of your neighbors while yelling,"Whoa! Easy boy !!"

Say," Interesting....more sinkers than floaters"

Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet
paper and drop under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say,
"Whoops, could you kick that back over here, please?"

Say, "C'mon Mr. Happy! Don't fall asleep on me!!

Say, "Boy, that sure looks like a maggot"

Say, "Darn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what
am I gonna do?"

Play a well known drum cadence over and oven again on your butt
cheeks

Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your
"Cross-Dressers Anonymous"newsletter on the floor visible to the
adjacent stall.

Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall and adjust it so you
can see your neighbor and say, "Peek-a-boo!"

Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing "Born Free"

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by Rents [/i]
[B]I used to have a problem with public toilets until I came to college. Now my bathroom pretty much is a public restroom and I can go just about anywhere. Most unfortunately, I've even had to re-enact the Trainspotting sequence, without the diving into the bowl. Impressed? [/B][/QUOTE]

NO! Ewwwwwwww.

I swear, you and that movie have scarred me. For real.

has anyone *ahem* accidentally gone number two in their pants as an adult?

though if possible i try to confine my public bathroom usage to #1/PEE-PEE, there comes a time in every person's life where a public #2 is unavoidable. this, in my life, has usually been when someone else decides to use the bathroom to TALK ON THEIR CELL PHONE.

if you've ever done this, FUCK YOU.

bad enough i'm taking a shit when other people can hear me. but those other people seem to feel the need to broadcast my taking a shit via cell phone to other points on the globe! wtf does the other person think when they hear flushing toilets and farting on the other end of the phone? what would possess someone to do this to me, to themselves, to their conversational cohort? WHY?!?!?!?!?!?

the other thing that drives me crazy about public restrooms is the fact that should you have a gaseous emission, other people will look at you when you come out of the stall like you are the most disgusting person they've ever remotely heard of. this makes me mad. because it's a BATHROOM for pete's sake. get over yourself. like you've never suffered from flatulence.

i hate having to pretend i'm all dainty in general in the ladies' room. what is with the pressure to wash your hands every time? do you wash your hands every time you use the bathroom at home?

also, being at college was the worst, because if i took reading material into the bathroom i got looked at like i was carrying around a crucified monkey. so i stopped. but come on. what's with the holier than thou attitude here. like people *dont* read in the bathroom at home. but at college...oh no...

public bathrooms make me hate humanity in general.

yeah, i don't get why people look at you funny in the bathroom. i mean, come on, chances are they just got finished what you're doing. fuckers! die. die. die. shit and then die!

damn right.

i always love it, though, when public bathroom stalls have interesting graffiti. i think bathroom graffiti was the first message board.

probably right. i go to the bathroom in my favorite bar in new york and it's always interesting to read what other new yorkers deem worthy enough for the stalls.

my personal favorite:

those who write upon these walls
should roll their shit in little balls
but those who read what's on here writ
should eat those little balls of shit.

transgression commodified
nate sucks a good dick
not the ordinary way dot com

[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by insomnomaniac [/i]
[B]what is with the pressure to wash your hands every time? do you wash your hands every time you use the bathroom at home?
[/B][/QUOTE]

ugh...YES!! yes, i wash my hands EVERYTIME i use the bathroom; at home, in public, fucking germs are germs.

what kind of antibacterial soap do you use, moe? *thrusts microphone into moe's face, smiles a dazzlingly bleach white smile and assumes the air of an advertising executive*

[QUOTE]
ugh...YES!! yes, i wash my hands EVERYTIME i use the bathroom; at home, in public, fucking germs are germs.[/QUOTE]

you're the type of person who gives people dirty looks for emitting flatulence in the restroom as well, aren't you? aren't you!?!?!!? and i bet you'd have stoned me for carrying a book with me into the bathroom, EVEN if i was on my way to class!! we should all be silent, bored and immaculate in the bathroom, huh moe. ron? when's the last time you talked on a cell phone in the bathroom, huh? HUH?!?!?!?!?

YOU ARE THAT PERSON!!!! DIE!!!! DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

uhh, I'm with moe on the whole washing hands thing.

And I can't ever recall someone looking at me weird whilst coming out of the stall. Ever. Maybe I'm just not that observant, or people are nicer around here.

Anyway, all of us Americans should count our lucky stars that we don't have to PAY to use the public bathrooms, like some other snooty countries that I could mention... *cough*

no, actually, i could care less what you do in the bathroom. but you're the person who wipes her nasty snatch and then walks out of the bathroom, leaving her nasty snatch-cooties all over the doorknob for me to pick up on my way out.

this is why i suddenly develop OCD in public restrooms.

if paying to use the toilet meant that they would be sparkling clean and free of filth, i would gladly pay to evacuate my baldder and bowels.

No. They aren't. Don't get your bloody hopes up.

i don't have any hopes. i just like the bold look of kohler!

What the fuck....?

kohler. they make bathroom fixtures among other things. don't they have a lowes or a home depot in aksarben?

Yeah, but I'm too afraid to go into them because my English teacher got whiplash when a box fell on her from like 10 shelves up. An empty box.

Imagine what would happen if a toilet fell on you or something.

sounds like rents could answer that one for you!

personal hell, gucci. why? i take all my dates to the home depot. i call it the home sexpot! *chuckles to himself because he's the only one who would chuckle*

[QUOTE]no, actually, i could care less what you do in the bathroom. but you're the person who wipes her nasty snatch and then walks out of the bathroom, leaving her nasty snatch-cooties all over the doorknob for me to pick up on my way out.

this is why i suddenly develop OCD in public restrooms.[/QUOTE]

and what do you think is on the knobs of the sink? hmmmm??? and the handle of the paper towel dispenser or hand blow dryer? on the soap dispenser? hmmmm?

as a matter of fact, i use purel antibacterial hand stuff after i use the bathroom. but since people don't see me use it like they see ppl washing their hands, i get dirty looks anyway. as people touch the knobs, handles and appliances that are probably dirtier than the toilets.

and another thing:

[QUOTE]girls, i've got 2 words: squat and hover[/QUOTE]

if YOU didn't squat and hover, NO ONE would have to squat and hover, cause your piss wouldn't be all over the seat.

i remember a drunken night in waterville when i imagined that i was some secret agent working in a chemical plant and i had to get rid of some chemical agents. i could easily have walked into the men's room in our library, but the window from the outisde was the obvious way in to me at the time. i squeezed through the window, broke into the custodian's locker and emptied all the cleaners into the huge basin and filled the basin up with water.

i did the same thing to the women's room across the hall, only this time i knocked, entered, broke into the locker and despoiled the bathroom.

when i got back to my dorm, still drunk, reeling in juvenile delinquency, i tore off the lid to a toilet and hurled it out onto the commons.

i passed out and in the morning had no recollection of my sordid activity.

alright, let's just calm down...i was merely answering the question you asked:
[QUOTE]do you wash your hands every time you use the bathroom at home?[/QUOTE]
and i replied, YES, i wash my hands everytime. but since you're so curious about my bathroom habits, i'll let you in on a little secret: you don't have to touch the knobs etc. in the bathroom if you don't want to, and i never want to. and i don't know about you, but i don't piss like a water can, that is, all over the place. and if you can't manage to keep all the pee-pee in the toilet, well maybe you shouldn't be allowed out of the house...or it's time to go home because you're drunk.

i take it back, i am a little curious about what you do in the bathroom, so let me ask you a question: what warrents a hand washing? is it every third time you go? only when the dirty looks really getcha down? do you have to have visible shit/piss on your hand? number two always, number one when you feel like it?

what warrants hand washing?
jesus, very time you touch your thingy, i guess.
and, certainly, every time you wipe your bung.

[QUOTE]i take it back, i am a little curious about what you do in the bathroom, so let me ask you a question: what warrents a hand washing? is it every third time you go? only when the dirty looks really getcha down? do you have to have visible shit/piss on your hand? number two always, number one when you feel like it?[/QUOTE]

i told you.

[QUOTE]as a matter of fact, i use purel antibacterial hand stuff after i use the bathroom. [/QUOTE]

you may not think you "go like a watering can" but i know your type. and trust me, after you've gotten done protecting your dainty little bottom from the toilet seat, your pee is on it. i promise. it just pisses me off.

and if you don't "go like a watering can" why the obsessive hand washing?

reminds me of a joke: an army man and a navy man are in the bathroom together. the army man is about to leave without washing his hands. the navy man chuckles and says, "you know, in the navy, they taught us to wash our hands after using the bathroom." the army man laughs back and says, "well, in the army, they taught us not to pee all over our hands."

oh, and when i wipe myself, the toilet paper i use touches my "nasty coochie cooties" (really mature choice of words, btw), but my hands don't. so i guess that begs the question, what do YOU do in the bathroom?

so you mean to tell me that NEVER in the history of your life have you gotten a single microdrop of piss on your hand while wiping? well, my obsessive hand washing is because i don't like those odds. call it public service, if you will, because i'll wash my hands even if i've only gone a little bit. oh yeah, i also wash my hands after i blow my nose...but i'll be willing to bet you just use extra tissues and call it a day. i know YOUR type. and short of you comin' all the way down here for me to prove that it doesn't take a rocket scientist to get a 1/4 inch stream of piss into a 12 inch wide bowl, you're just going to have to take my word for it.

p.s. i actually said "nasty snatch-cooties."

*meow*

cat fight i mean

so you don't like the odds of a microdrop of piss getting on your hand, or a tiny bit of snot when you blow your nose, but you are confident in the odds that your stream of piss will get in the bowl every time?

maybe YOU have nasty snatch cooties. maybe i have things to worry about other than whether i have cooties. human beings used to live in caves, wipe their asses with their hands, and then eat with those hands. and they survived. i'm not saying we should live like that anymore, but please. didn't your grandmother ever tell you, you have to eat a pound of dirt before you die? we all have bacteria, germs, fecal matter, everything, floating around on us all the time. you know there are microscopic spiders that live in your eyelashes? you know you have a certain type of dust mite all over your skin? and no matter what you do, you have bacteria and germs all over you all the time. in fact, we need many of them to help our bodies function. i don't shower every single day, either. i bet you think that's gross, too. the ridiculous fact that you see yourself as superior because of how often you apply water to your body aside, i think it's just common sense. people don't need to shower every single day, and we don't need to wash our hands every five minutes. end of story.

i bet you guys never knew there was such hidden hostility in the ladies' room, huh?

fecal matter, insom. love that.

no, i guess, we thought it was all laura ashley in the ladies room.

heaven forbid a woman nurses her baby in there too. you should see the looks those poor women get.

omg. they have those fucking changing stations in the men's rooms now. society wants me to be a caregiving androgynous drone. *runs in circles until the clown hits him over the head with a fish*