Now You're Me....
imagine that you're having a hearty chuckle as you watch your parents and a few neighbors dangling from the ceiling of the garage by their toenails, which have been stapled into the stucco.
and imagine that very soon, you plan to hunt down and personally strip the skin from every person who's participated in this thread. now you're satan. me.
[color=green]
dear daddy,
i write you in spite of years of silence.
you've cleaned up, found Jesus, things are good or so i hear.
this bottle of Steven's awakens ancient feelings.
like father, stepfather, the son is drowning in the flood.[/color]
Imagine reading dirty spaniard's post on how he will kill a number of people including you. Imagine you think that could be an improvement in the actual circumstances. Now you're me.
Imagine seeing what you've just written and going :'Naaah...' [I]Now[/I] you're me.
[img]http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y172/LoopLaLouve/award_met.jpg[/img]
Imagine, if you will, that you have epilepsy, but forget to inform your horny young lover of this particular condition. You take her to bed, she's riding you from the top, facing away from you, and the escalated blood flow sets off one of your episodes. You're squirming, writhing, making odd sounds...but she's just enjoying herself, thinking you like to play rough. When she looks back and sees you foaming at the mouth, she's a bit confused, wondering how you were able to come simultaneously into her [i]and[/i] into your own mouth. Now you're me.
Not. Thank God.
[CENTER]a million bucks[/CENTER]
Satan quotes Weezer in his sig?
Woah.
Total mindblow.
everybody's gotta look up to somebody
Mindblow my ass! *kicks Disx to death*
There is hope, but not for us.
Whoa, that's [i]my[/i] line... *Goes off. Monkey punches Dirty Spaniard for pretending to be "Dark and slightly dangerous."*
Yeah, but you weren't around to use it, so I decided to model myself after you. Did I do okay?!! *anxious face*
There is hope, but not for us.
(Nice one, Jane.)
(thank you. Now I shall go glow in your approval 
.)
There is hope, but not for us.
Its not that hard folks!
[img]http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/avatar.php?userid=1931&dateline=1056783402[/img] : Imagine me kicking Disx to death. Now you're me.
[img]http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/avatar.php?userid=2458&dateline=1055190031[/img] : Imagine Jane using [i]your[/i] line plus the filthy spainyard acting all dark and dangerous. Now you're me.
C'mon guys, just give it a shot, please!
I'm on a [i]roll[/i] tonight! Taking all the good lines...kicking disx to death...I'm hardcore.
There is hope, but not for us.
HEY JANE! QUIT FUCKING THIS UP! I'LL UH, EXPOSE SOMETHING ELSE ABOUT YOU! THAT ONLY I KNOW!!! even though i don't hardly know anything...
imagine that you are having some weird spasm behind your knee and that you feel good cause your socks are off and your hat is off too so your head feels kind of funny and you are scared of spiders and ronald mcdonald but don't care cause tomorrow you get to blow shit up and possibly scare little kids and your hands are getting sweaty on the keyboard and you don't know what you're saying anymore but you keep going cause you like they way the words look as you type...
SO YOU USE ELIPSES BUT KEEP GOING AND YOUR BUDDY KEEPS ENCOURAGING YOU TO DO STUFF AND YOU SAY OKAY CAUSE YOU LIKE YOUR BUDDY WITH IMMENSE BUDDY POWERS!!! and now you're me.
Imagine that you LOVE YOUR BUDDY SO MUCH RIGHT NOW YOU WANT TO WALTZ!!!, now you're me
imagine having a shower that has a full length mirror where tiles should be, and imagine that your body is covered with tattoos and scars that over the years you have learned to regret and hate. Imagine having to shower with your eyes shut. [i]now you're me.[/i]
Imagine you're D, but without the shower and regret. Now you're [i]me[/i].
Imagine that you are imagining Tuffy and d in the shower. Now you're me.
imagine that you're logging out of the forums and shutting down your computer because mirkah is making you feel *ahem* uncomfortable. Now you're me. and probably Tuffy as well.
imagine sniffing in, feeling a dust booger blocking one nostril. sitting, right leg going a bit num, eyes burning again, like always thinking of something witty to type, but nothing comes to mind. Just listen to the fan hum, hum, hum, and think, oh yeah, I can tell them about the other night when my piece of shite computer froze up before i could save the latest chapter of my book... thinking to self, no, that isn't good enough. pick your nose to breathe with out interruption, stare emptily at the screen, type somemore boring words.... still nothing. now, you're me.
Imagine you totally evaded Jane's pathetic attempt to kick you to death. Now you're me.
imagine being freaked out and amazed at such quick, beyond cat like reflexes! imagine needing more than the wholesome bowl of honey nut cheerios you just partook in wiffing down. now you're me.
Image sitting in the office of Super Camp, because you are being sent home for arguing with authority figures, and you have made a name for yourself, so campers keep running up to you and hugging you. Now you're me. At least I get to use the computer.
Super Camp?
I was expecting that question...
Super Camp is a camp that is very super... apperently.
Well, it is a camp that, at least in this forum, the Junior Forum(6th-8th grade), they teach you quantum reading, quantum writing, and quantum statagies(how to study faster and better). They also have 8 keys of success: Integrity, Failure Leads To Success, Speak With Good Purpose, This Is It, Commitment, Ownership, Flexibility, and Balance. It isn't as cheesy as it sounds. It is actually pretty fun and it is a solid operation.
Reminds of of a preschool that you have to apply to.
Don't draw this out please!!! Don't ruin this thread please!! Start a super Camp thread please!! Use your PM system please!!
Sorry!
Imagine you're sitting on your couch in your living room with a laptop on your lap, trying to get used to using that little ball between the G, H, and B keys instead of a mouse. And the heat from the computer is making your lap hot. Now you're me.
Imagine you're stuck inside a giant rusting steel house with no windows for 24 hours straight, sitting at the computer all day except to walk around on the roof in the sun for 8 hours with a 20 pound piece of steel on your back, being forced to eat food you wouldn't feed to your dog and sleeping in a barely padded metal box about the size of a coffin. Now you're me.
Imagine you're pinching XChuck's teeny nipples. You're still you, just being pathetic by wishing you were me.
[CENTER]a million bucks[/CENTER]
imagine being independent for all of your life, having your parents flying in and checking up on you once in a while. but for the last month, you have been saturated by the constant nagging and bitching from parents as if they are filling in for the lost time. imagine your mother who treats purchasing condos as if it is a game, dependent on her mood. imagine having to make calls to the broker weeks before closing that "sorry, we're not interest"...or after purchasing another condo, calling to tell another broker "sorry we're not interseted"...imagine you are the equilibrium of it all. in the middle of a game....dependent on the mood of your mother. now, you're me
[img]http://img93.exs.cx/img93/3678/hoos13as.jpg[/img]
imagine you, badly in need of some "alone" time. after planting yourself in front of the computer after a long shower, your parents ask you to make more calls, to look at more stuff...to do this and that... and all you wanted to do is sit in front of the computer, and watch curb your ethusiasm...and the nagging never stops...now, you're me
[img]http://img93.exs.cx/img93/3678/hoos13as.jpg[/img]
Imagine for the first time in your life you are happy with yourself and knowing that this can't last too long. Now you're me.
Imagine you thought your pain was special and unique, now you're about two billion people.
Imagine trying to delete a post on the board but it not letting you for some reason, now you're me.
[SIZE=1][COLOR=MediumTurquoise]i respect your honesty, but i detest what you're being honest about[/COLOR].[/SIZE]
i wanna go out drinking but no one's answerring or around
Imagine you're new to the forum, and a little nervous about posting for the first time. You're a bit of a case, and you really don't have a damn thing to say, so you post the most innocuous thing possible. You retreat in horror, waiting for the hounds to tear you apart. Yep, you're an idiot...now you're me.
::tears succotash apart::
[CENTER]a million bucks[/CENTER]
Imagine you now feel all warm and fuzzy. Now you're me
Good first post. I don't think you'll have much to worry about.
Just remember not to drop the soap
But since you had a good first post... if you drop the soap we'll be gentle.
which means lube, most first timers don't get that lucky.
This is what usually happens
[img]http://www.opsonicindex.org/salo/salton.gif[/img]
And in the rare case, the recipient is smiling. But once we notice that, we usually get grossed out and stop.
Imagine you're the rare case. Now you're...well, I've said too much already, now haven't I...lol.
That picture is going to give me nightmares, you fucks.
[CENTER]a million bucks[/CENTER]
Imagine you're still coughing from a nasty tropical virus you picked up while going up gold-coast way last week and marvelling at how all these girls keep saying your horrid husky voice due to said illness sounds, 'sexy', being glad your performance review was glowing and that you get some cool shit from the boss, being glad you get to actually have FUN this week because somebody else has monday to friday free for a change, pondering what kind of new pants you should buy, remembering one of the gorgeous girls you got to stare at for hours at a Cafe in Brisbane over a Cappucino, enjoying the enormous subwoofer installed on your computer terminal at work(!), wishing you had nachos here, chuckling at the thought of your shifts in the coming weeks being cut from 12 to 8 hours, thinking of ways to make a girl you don't like cry in mental aguish, checking out expensive courses to get your boss to send you on, wishing you had more than just pasta & chocolate chip cookies to eat this shift at work, alternating between annoyed and vaguely relieved that your girlfriend will be in Canada for the next two weeks, being envious that your work computer's two 21" monitors are better than yours... and you're me, for a while anyway.
imagine you keep having the same old stupid girl trouble and it's all what you've done to yourself. sort of. you want to talk to her 24/7, but she rarely answers her phone. work all day humming music to keep all the redundant girl crap out of your head, but when it's time to go home, first thing you do is want to call her, but you know she won't answer. you just want to hear her voice and make her laugh. you argue with yourself and don't call. just email a little blah note and go about your basic plans. it's not so bad, you just need to be reminded every day what she thinks of you, you twit. now you're me.
Imagine that you don't really give a shit about relationships any more, which is weird since up until this point that was pretty much the only thing in the world you cared about. But it's a good thing, and you're glad and honestly you can't think of any girl you've ever known that you wish you had gotten together with. At least not for a serious relationship, although there are a few you wish you had had some fun with, but didn't... Now you're me.
imagine wishing you could learn and live by what disx just said except you're a restless guy when it comes to these things... imagine thinking disx has given you an idea, and it just might work. you've thought this a hundred times and only done it once, but maybe you're ready for it now, to not fucking care. now you're me...
Imagine you're totally badass. Now you're me.