New members on the Cult - a genuine discussion
This is carrying over from Nightrious's post in the Tank Girl thread, because really, this should be talked about, and easy to find.
New users won't think to look in something called "Tank Girl".
You can see the excellent post in question HERE
I'm totally with Dan on this. I have done the same thing in terms of counseling newbs who've wondered why so-and-so is so cruel to them (and it's happened many times, and they weren't only crying about Six, it's been this way since at least '06 for me). My advice was always the same: ignore them alone, let it roll off your back, settle in and make friends, everything will equal out.
Five seconds later, they're back in the same threads, getting in the face of the person who "insulted their honor" or whatever.
I keep seeing these replies scattered around welcome threads like "ooh, I hope you have a thick skin" or "ooh be brave, this place will destroy you", but ...really? There's a higher percentage of people who have stuck around vs those who have left. And really, without naming names...one guy tries to come in bragging about banging "fat ugly chicks", or a mastodon or whatever, to paraphrase his poetic language, and people gave him shit for it.
Another newb who disappeared kept getting angry when people WOULD ASK HIM TO STOP POSTING IN ALL CAPS. And he wouldn't let it go. He got shit for it.
99% of the time when someone gets crapped on, it's because they deserve it, or we, in a none-too-subtle way, are saying "we are a community, here are the adjustments we'd like you to make if you wish to continue hanging around here".
People get shit here when they come in acting like they own the place. Pretty much everyone gets hazed, and most people get through it. Hell, BloodSugar took an inordinate amount of crap when he first got here, but now he's like our very own "guy on the couch". Why? He abides. He would jab back on occasion, but he never cried about shit.
Yeah, there have been a few people who've gotten crap on a level I can't understand for doing next to nothing. 1%, maybe. But those same people, for the most part, kept going back for more. Via PM, I would tell them, the best way to handle this situation is to ignore it, move on. And the cycle would repeat.
I guess, my point is, I don't see it. I just don't see this big clique-y bully circle that people seem to complain about, and I think it's blown way out of proportion. Everyone, for the most part, is very welcoming from what I've seen.
...how about that ignore button? Still not coming?