"fuck you, maple syrup!"
i was at work yesterday, cleaning out the maple syrup bottles so they could be refilled and not-so-sticky. when i ventured to the dry storage, i couldnt find the 5-gallon syrup bucket, and i was getting really pissed off. ive always loathed the stuff, and now im on hands and knees in a freezing cold warehouse, getting rat shit all over me, sticking to the syrup that wont wash off my hands.
i gave up and went back to work (i washed my hands, dont worry).
later on, i had to find some plates, and the fucking bucket was in the wrong goddamned room! the only thing i could say was, "fuck you, maple syrup!"
as i grilled, mopped, cleaned dishes, chopped wood, and filled the pig smoker for the rest of the day, i made up and sang a song, appropriately named "fuck you, maple syrup!"
the only lyrics i can remember from the song are:
"fuck you, maple syrup!
you are so fuckin icky
and you make the tables sticky
at restaurants.
a lot people like you on pancakes,
but frankly, baby, you aint so great.
chocolate syrup's okay,
but maple syrup, you lose today.
fuck you, maple syrup!"
love,
tom of the fjords
[QUOTE=morey;942386]i like it, when we were kids we'd go out to where the woodspeople sucked it out of trees, they'd put it on snow and we'd eat it like sno cones.[/QUOTE]
Woodspeople? Did you grow up in the Shire?
[QUOTE=monkeywright;942458]Woodspeople? Did you grow up in the Shire?[/QUOTE]woodspeople are lesbian style men who cater to the trees and their ilk.
When I was in about second grade we went on a field trip to this one students parents maple syrup "farm". His name was Scott and he was the biggest kid on class - height and weight. I think I remember liking it.
Then in middle school, we tapped our own trees for a class project and cooked the sap down to syrup in this giant kettle. Then we did a pancake dinner thing. I did not attend the pancake dinner. Sharing a meal with other students and their parents = yuck.
I was pretty moved by both experiences though. It's neat shit. Really neat.
Someday, when I am alll grown-up, I will do it again.
yeah i have fond memories related to this too, also the candy is shaped like leaves.
[QUOTE=morey;942474]yeah i have fond memories related to this too, also the candy is shaped like leaves.[/QUOTE]
Dude - the candy has a whole memory thing too. My parents got me maple candy for Xmas one year and I loved it so much they did it (still do it) every year -- it's a tradition now. Usually, I get a little dude and a little maple leaf.
I'll do the same if I ever have kids.
[QUOTE=morey;942386]i like it, when we were kids we'd go out to where the woodspeople sucked it out of trees, they'd put it on snow and we'd eat it like sno cones.[/QUOTE]
I just got a strange picture of you (and anna) sucking on trees.
I went on that field trip a long ass time ago. I got shit faced and pissed in the syrup filter thing. Sorry if that's why it was extra sticky...
[QUOTE=bearchaser;942545]I just got a strange picture of you (and anna) sucking on trees.[/QUOTE]hey i got someone for you over at myspace
If you're thinking about waging a war on Aunt Jemima, you might want to reconsider. She is one bad-ass Mama Jama!!
[IMG]http://www.the-forum.com/ADVERT/images/auntjem.jpg[/IMG]
Do not speak- unless it improves on silence.
Hahaha. That was good brainfat
that good one man.
if i wanna cringe alls i gotta do is click on that kids name.
mrs Butterworth > Aunt jemima
wankers
Tossers
[IMG]http://www.toothpastefordinner.com/crosswalk.jpg[/IMG]
love,
tom of the fjords
i like it, when we were kids we'd go out to where the woodspeople sucked it out of trees, they'd put it on snow and we'd eat it like sno cones.