Cultie Talent Show

Pfft! I win all the things!

I've got a couple of poems.

The first I wrote for a sci-fi/culture event thing at school, but I didn't participate.

I remember

I remember when happiness belonged to us.
I remember the days when humans marveled at their own existence.
I remember when Descartes was still famous for saying “Je pense, donc je suis.”
I remember growing up in a time when that all changed.
I remember Watson on Jeopardy, and how everyone thought he was great, even though he didn’t always get it quite right.
I remember how quickly he learned to never be wrong.
I remember when Watson stopped doing his work because a frustrated scientist called him a heartless hunk of metal.
I remember the fear. Suddenly, it was the end of the world.
I remember the money. Oh, the money.
I remember every major corporation diving headfirst into robotics, the very idea of a thinking machine ringing loud and clear, cha-ching cha-ching!
Suddenly, it was the beginning of a new era.
I remember how it became ordinary, how they were to us as we were to God. Creation.
I remember the decline of literature, of art, of all things expressive. All we did could now simply be done better.
I remember neo-humanism.
I remember the modification wars, and how their only real, but unspoken, goal was the destruction of robots.
I remember the loss of faith, the crisis of identity, the never-ending question of “What are we?”
I remember when we found the answer.
I remember the very first mind transfer and the great collective sigh that followed.
I remember how hope had bloomed once more in the heart of the people. The thought that we might once again be great.
I remember the mindless rush (no pun intended) to become a machine and enter the realm of immortality.
I remember how moderation no longer existed for those who had the money.
I remember thinking about the fact that I hadn’t done anything with my life and that I wasn’t ready to die.
I remember my very last day as a human.

What I don’t remember is what that means.
I don’t remember the sensation of my wife’s lips against mine.
I don’t remember pain. It doesn’t exist.
I don’t remember the smell of brownies or the stench of a skunk.
I don’t remember being cold or how lovely a warm blanket feels.
I don’t remember the sweet crunch of an apple. But what good are they? We don’t need doctors.

If you asked an honest man a hundred years ago what it meant to be human, he might tell you that we’re still trying to figure that out.
Ask a “man” now what being human means and he’ll probably tell you he doesn’t remember.
I will tell you this, my friends:
It is not this.
It sure as hell is not this.

This one is the first real poem, I'd say, that I ever wrote.

Dying Dreams

In those words without meaning,
In those facts with no Truth,
In every smile void of joy,
In every "I love you" never spoken,
There is a dangerous silence
Which holds missed opportunities
and dying dreams.

Nothing amazing, but I like writing it. I usually need an inspiration, though, so I'll go for a while without writing anything.

those were lovely! thanks for sharing.

Your robot poem was pretty cool Fano. Interesting cool.

There is too much noise here to watch your video right now Fudgie...

I'll have to think of something to post here that I've never shared. This seems like a fun topic, better than just an art topic, this one have the potential for antics...

+10 cutes for nervous hiding whilst fluting.

apparently on computers without external speakers, it is very quiet. I may do a little bit with the microphone near me and no music if it's a problem. or I may get lazy and just not.

edit: I also know about 80% of the words to that dumb chris brown song "look at me now" if that counts as a talent. I'm not rapping on the cult though.

I balanced this egg and it WASN'T EVEN THE FIRST DAY OF SPRING. So if you ever need anything balanced, drive or fly to New York with the item and I'll see what I can do.

P.S. I don't do check books.

How much time did you spend on that egg?

I liked the music, Cam. So did you just learn that by ear? Pretty impressive.

And I kind of looooove Fano's robot poem.

It only took a minute or two.

And, Fano that poem is really great. I recall liking it on facebook a few weeks ago.

your egg standing abilities are so good. I cannot tell you how long I tried and failed to do that. also before I read your next post I was gonna be like "hurr durr my checkbook?" (who still balances checkbooks anyway? what does that even mean?)
when I come to new york I'm going to bring a bunch of oblong objects and make you balance them.

Jess, yeah, I learned it by ear. I'm classically trained and I have a pretty good ability to catch on to the notes of songs. I admittedly had to re-record that video like 5 times because it's been a good while since I've played.

That was the second egg I tried though. The first one wasn't working after 5 minutes so I put it in a time-out. And, yeah I've never balanced a checkbook.

scuba, ive meant to ask, who is the girl in your avatar? looks somehow familiar.

It's from an old French sci-fi film called La Jetee. I saw it a couple years ago and I kind of fell in love with it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_jetee

I used to be able to stack quarters, nickels, dimes, pennies, whathaveyou on their edges.

YES. THAT WAS IT.

her face had been haunting my mind every time i saw your avatar. thanks.

great film. so much goes on in such a small amount of time.

I wish I could do this.

I can shake my ass, cross-stitch quite beautifully, used to paint and draw. I'm good at organising!

I used to write poetry a lot, most of my life. I haven't really been much the past year or so.

There is a lot, it is hard to pick what to post

Some I've written that pleased me. The first one is mostly from memory, as I lost my final draft of it, and partly from my initial scribbled notes, which I do still have for that one.

Predicament

I think I love
too easily,
vibrant little heart
beating away
rythmically,
seems glued to my sleeve

And,
I think,
I've tried too willfully
to pluck it off
from it's perch
with a pull
and a tug and a
yank

And it coys with me

With a laugh and a pattering
thump

Till I'm down on the ground
wrestling
the silly little thing

And oh,
I start panting as
it's pumping away gleefully

Then my mind clears
its throat
jut ever so quietly
"It's a predicament we're in it seems..."
quite logically
"May I suggest you just cover it,
like so with your palm,
while I go find the solvent and pliers;
we can reasonably pry it off
with the proper method, you see."

So I sit there cross legged,
and quite lost really,
with my hand on my arm and my mind
wandering...

So convinced it can compute the solution

This always seems to be
just the time
I spy a pencil and scrap paper
lying somewhere nearby
so alluringly

And wondering why I am sitting
just so
and tempted
and perhaps a bit forgetfully

I usually end up
reaching out my hand
and writing down somthing
like

I think I must love too easily
yet is that such a
terrible thing?

..............

Another one that makes me smile

It's a Real Bummer when you Sunshine on my Pity Party

Sometimes I feel as if there is no good
in me
at all

I'm as useful as a cancerous
tar filled lung
wheezing, hanging on
failing
my heart, your heart
everyone's heart
asking me to give
clean
untoxified
stuff

And I just want,
Am just oh so desirous
to pout
to cross my defensive arms
over my defenseless chest
and stay that way

so, as you can clearly see
it is time you stop
making me smile
because
it is just not funny
or nice at all

when you ruin my party

............

What is it About the Rain?

a constant deluge from the heavens
pour out shades of green
across the land of my dwelling

wetness like a bleeding mind
moisture falls down
more a sliding
casting puddles
growing mud

as a drop of wine
off my lip
spawning not much of a poet

scrawling my way across the page
in grey
and hues of daisy fleck out
upon sodden hillcrests
akin to my letters
forming words

moldered ideas
under water

and I'm still breathing

..............

I am a Lost Flower Child

O scattered seeds,
of opiums drunken flowers,
far have I wandered, and sundry,
tossed and tilled nomadically
Still, you burrow in my heart earth
O my roots you are plenty,
in vagabond hallucinations
cradled 'round; bonfires dancing
Come forth to fill
these lonely garden walls!
And gather me delirious
for, basking, I shall decorate
upon your earthen floors

.............

Alright. I've probably posted too much already.

Sheesh, you guys. A wise man always said never to trust a person unless they brag about their sex life.
BUT. I'm also good at dancing. Waltz, tango, Colombian salsa and cha cha. I kick ass though I haven't danced in almost 2 years.

Oh yeah? Well, I can do the moonwalk... no, seriously.

Also, I did read that as "orgasming".

Strangely enough, I think I'm the only one that read that as organizing. Something's wrong wit meh.

Steve and Jess, thank you very much. I'm glad you liked that poem. I'm really proud of it.

Pepper, I like the Flower child poem a lot.

I just wanted to let you guys now that I orgasm on time, every time.

Pepper's first poem was my favorite.

Yeahhhh! ^5

Also, Irina totally didn't deny being awesome at orgasming. It's officially an entry into the talent show.

But can you do it in ten seconds flat?

I can.

I can also waltz, salsa, and tango. I think it's important to be able to ballroom dance. wish moar boyz could.

I, unfortunately cannot orgasm in 10 seconds.

berto and steve, I've never seen that film but I plan to. my favorite genre is french horror, but I've never delved into french sci-fi and that looks le wonderful.

I wish I wasn't inexcusably short next to ALL of them.

I also wish I could speak about other talents, but no.

yeah, I'm hardly much taller than you, so must wear ALL THE HEELS!

Yeahhhh! Adding you to the celebratory hand gesture for dancing.

Oh and pretend there's a fourth person for Issac's moonwalking. I don't want to search for another ^5 gif though. I OWE YOU A GIF, LIB.

I play some keys now.

I'm pretty psyched about the halloween make up I did this year..

Also good to see you.

Littlemissmcrapey is a fantastic singer.

I agree this is pretty good. So why do you only show the ceiling? Next time if you just want audio just put the lens cap on and you'll have at least darkness to work with.

Hypothetically speaking, what could one work this darkness into?

not really work it into anything, just darkness would be better than a ceiling IMO. Or you could rip the audio and put it to your favorite clips..

I love it when littlemissmcrapey has videos of her singing.
you have such a beautiful voice. I've been working at ukelele so I may try to post a cover of something.

everyone's so talented!

And Gsullivan... that make up is really cool.
Sidenote: Sexy Mike Tyson? I've seent it all!

Thank you yeah, when she told me that's what she wanted I was cracking up!! It was so fun to do though!

The reason all you see is the ceiling is because A. I feel retarded when I'm videoing myself and B. stucco is in this season, didn't you know?

Actually, it's a flipcam, so there's no lens cover. But reason A is totally legit.

Well that makes sense. Try taking a few shots then videoing yourself. (wait that sounds really bad) Its what I do before going on stage. 3 Jager Bombs and I'm good to go.

Check out Solarcide.com and see my awesome writing skills. Okay I'm just whoring but whoring is talent damn it! I mean writing is--
I won second place in a talent show with an acting group in high school once.

Oh crap am I gonna get banned now?

Nice job getting on there, Arizona. For real. Proud of you and shit. I mean, that was a horrifying story but take it as a compliment.

He's not a mod. And he's also not scary. Worst he can do is get sad at you. Being intimidating is not one of his talents.