[Contest] Make Me Laugh!
oh your not v, the women on this site love you, ...the men not so much
nothing is as perfect as you can imagine it.
v teabagged the cult. quite literally. he is a god loved by women men and dwarfs !
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play hard, like it's work to be done.
Dwarves are the third sex. Who knew?
This is why we can't have nice things.
well, usually.
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play hard, like it's work to be done.
dwarves are actually sexless. how do they keep sprouting up? well, that's the thing: they're grown, not born.
That is one awesome prize. Zoth did you make a speech yet?
dude? are you makin fun of JK?
if not, first post on page 2
nothing is as perfect as you can imagine it.
Big Sellers for Christmas in Louisville , KY
Mattel recently announced the release of the improved limited-edition Barbie Dolls for the Louisville market:
" St. Matthews Barbie"
This princess Barbie is sold only at Oxmoor Mall. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade Handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog named Honey and a moderatly sized yet overpriced house. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version.
"Jeffersontown Barbie"
The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Wind star Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.
"Shivley Barbie"
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife,a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable bills) ..unless you are a cop, then we don't know what you are talking about.
"Prospect Barbie"
This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card and country club membership. Also available for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.
"Hillview Barbie"
This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken's butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.
"South-end Barbie"
This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of St. Matthews Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter-top. Also available with a mobile home.
" Highlands Barbie"
This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow . She does not want or need a Ken doll, but if you purchase two Highlands Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.
" Portland Barbie"
This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.
"4th St Live Barbie/Ken"
This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts.
I have this dream life where I get to be a celebrity but I get to navigate the world fairly easily because I'm always in character. ~dana carvey
I am not giving away any more prizes.
This is why we can't have nice things.
hahaha
aww, come on.. i really want a barbie, though
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play hard, like it's work to be done.
Hi 2 all!
My name is Alex.
I'm like read Chuck Palahniuk books by Russian.
Unfortunately my English is bad
I wanna improve it, I wanna have a talk with somebody in Skype
Does anybody can help me with my English?
If you can help me, send me private message please
Sorry to trouble you all.
learning English
Also not the least bit funny.
This is why we can't have nice things.
It's not a joke!
learning English
My name is Alex.
I'm like read Chuck Palahniuk books by Russian.
Unfortunately my English is bad
I wanna improve it, I wanna have a talk with somebody in Skype
Does anybody can help me with my English?
If you can help me, send me private message please
Sorry to trouble you all.
go here and create your own "Hi, I'm New" thread. that way we can get to know you:
http://chuckpalahniuk.net/forum/1000033-1
..
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play hard, like it's work to be done.
Okay, with deep regret I finally unstuck this thread. It was a fine cult moment, so thank you very much, Tuff.
'bout time.
RIP laughie thread.
This is why we can't have nice things.
There's really only maybe two things that were funny in this thread anyways.
Enlighten us, won't you?
I still havent bought anything with the amazon gift certificate. I promise I will. Again, very much appreciated!
Me dancing naked is certainly not funny.
I finally used the gift card and I got In Odd We Trust by Dean Koontz (don't make fun of me) and a pair of aviator sunglasses. Thanks again, Tuffy.
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play hard, like it's work to be done.
We do need more naked dancing around here. I don't understand how that is a trend that never caught on - I mean, we have Dress Down for a reason.
Good coffee is like drinking Rock and Roll.
For Jane: http://chuckpalahniuk.net/forum/1000026/jane
im retarded, clearly-
i meant jane. i dont know why i so often confuse the two in my posts. they really are nothing alike, but for some reason i lump em together. probably because they were around readily when i first started
/thanks for the note
sorry to jane and six
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I am easily missed!
I could take that one either way, really...