Buzzkill of the Day
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I had this idea for a web show which at its base is a comedy sketch show, but it's all about a character who is deciding what type of web show he wants to create. Like one episode will be about him reviewing something in a funny way. The next, answering advice questions, writing music, building crazy projects etc..
I'm sorry to hear about your husband.
Buzzkill: Today was pretty much like yesterday, though near the end I decided to take control of how I felt about things. I might say something. Accidentally annoy the guy behind me. But instead of being humiliated or hating myself, I'll laugh at his grumpishness.
A fucking shooting at the mall. Sixty or more shots fired, couple of confirmed deaths already.
maybe less shots, I don't know.
Wait, which mall. I got friends that work all of them.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
Clackamas Town Center.
Death toll two, one in critical condition, and unclear if others or injured. Thank god it was no more.
The shooter is dead, self inflicted. he had an automatic something or other, unleashed his bullshit in the food court.
they shut 205 south down for a while, only emergency vehicles. I could hear the sirens for s good hour nonstop.
I'm quite shook up about it, was, calmed down now. When I shop at the mall that is the one. I did much of my Christmas shopping there last year. Gabe hangs out there with his friends all the time. That is where we go to the movies. Some of my friends were there earlier today shopping.
Amber, are all your friends accounted for? I hope nobody close to you was hurt or witness to that.
What a horrible thing to happen....
I am pretty sure everyone is accounted for.
He left for work. There are jobs in this state. He didn't need to leave.
No breakdowns. Just wants me to watch our child, while he does his own thing. Doesn't want me to separate or divorce, either. Acts like this is normal marriage stuff. He didn't want me before he left, though. Made excuses for why he didn't touch me, the longest stretch was 4 months. This time, it's around 4 months again. That's bad because we've only been together 3 years. He thinks I'm fat. I've gained 30. And he hates my body. Joey has an eating disorder. Only eats once a day, and is definitely anorexic and perhaps bulimic. I've caught him throwing up, but he says its just nausea. But, men don't throw up a few times every week, not normal. He doesn't work out, and doesn't get the concept that skinny people can be very flabby. He will not face the fact that he is the unhealthy one. He chain smokes and drinks every day. Glad to be away from his craziness, but miss him. I won't settle for crazy, he can stay there. In his own world.
Quitting the day care job. The boss's 5 year old keeps kicking Issy in the stomach. Lays on her back and with the bottoms of both her feet at the same time with all her strength, like a kangaroo. She could kill my baby. She is big and 3 years older than Issy. She knows better and doesn't get disciplined. She's a bully and picks on kids smaller than herself. She waits until my head is turned or I am around a corner.
A really smart articulate 5 yr old girl said, "I saw her kick her". When I passed by her.
I turn my head back, and my little Issy in screaming like I've never heard, ever in pain, holding her stomach, on her back, bending her head forward...I don't know if her head has hit the ground or a corner, when she was kicked, and it bounced back up.
The mean girl's mom just says stuff like - She just plays like a boy.
Her kid is the meanest one, and she knows it. She lets kids dump toys all over and no discipline to any.
The day care is really nice, besides those two big issues, and so is the lady that runs it.
I'm getting out now, before Issy gets seriously injured.
It's our Christmas too. No whining, I'm going to nip this shyt in the bud.
The boss wants a mandatory Christmas party. Mandatory tree decorating. Mandatory gifts and gifts to the worker's kids. I'm feeling this is all hypocritical. Plus, we only get minimum wage, and it's part-time. wtf? Here's a gift - tell your kid to stop kicking my baby in the stomach! My baby would really like that for Christmas.
I'm telling her tomorrow. This is why I didn't like Christmas. So many hypocrites and their fancy bows and crap. Just treat people decent every day.
I know that's a lot, but forgive me for letting off steam.
I'm getting this to put on my wedding ring finger.
Oh man. I'm sorry you're going through all that. And that kid, such a little fucker. Your girl is the most important, so do whatever you can to make sure you two are happy.
My friend was working saw some of it. Friend of a friend died. Small town Portland.
Also more of my general shit but a bottle of wine help. Mad mood head doc tomorrow
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
Amber, I'm so glad that your kids are safe.
Mike, do one sample show and see what happens. Let us know what percolates. Sounds fun and theraputic.
And, laughing at grumps is one of my favorite hobbies.
Also, I enjoy rolling my eyes and doing a Billy Idol lip curl at the particularly dumb grumps. A little lip curl goes a long way. This gif is a level 10 sneer. Don't go there, start with a simple level 3, just send a clear message across.
Thank you so much, Irina. Everyone's kind words mean a lot to me right now.
Also more of my general shit but a bottle of wine help. Mad mood head doc tomorrow
I'm so sorry. Noah, hope your friend finds some comfort and peace.
I'm sorry about all of that Sema. It is really all awful.
Get your baby out of there, and don't cut your own finger off, just cut the ring he gave you off. If you owe him any finger it isn't the ring finger, try one over, works better for situations like this.
Sorry about your situation, Sema, can't imagine what that's like. 
My buzzkill today is people being difficult. I'm having dinner later today with some girls from work and it's a pain in the ass trying to figure out exactly where and what time. Sigh.
I can't believe that kid, Sema. You should shout at her if no one else will.
Anyway, shouldn't a five year-old be in kindergarden?
Death toll two, one in critical condition, and unclear if others or injured. Thank god it was no more.
The shooter is dead, self inflicted. he had an automatic something or other, unleashed his bullshit in the food court.
they shut 205 south down for a while, only emergency vehicles. I could hear the sirens for s good hour nonstop.
I'm quite shook up about it, was, calmed down now. When I shop at the mall that is the one. I did much of my Christmas shopping there last year. Gabe hangs out there with his friends all the time. That is where we go to the movies. Some of my friends were there earlier today shopping.
Amber, I'm glad evryone you know is okay.
WTF--why can't those nut jobs just kill themselves; why do they have to take others with them?
Sorry Sema
Get your baby out of there, and don't cut your own finger off, just cut the ring he gave you off. If you owe him any finger it isn't the ring finger, try one over, works better for situations like this.
I couldn't've said it any better myself. I'm actually surprised that you are taking that as well as you are.
I had an awful nightmare about a guy being tied up, doused in bat urine and set on fire by a gang of children. I don't know why they did that. I think it was some kind of political statement, or rather they wanted it to be a political statement but it was really just collective, villainous tomfoolery. And then I was on a parade float with old friends, hugging and kissing them on their cheeks and wishing them a Merry Christmas.
i imagine ritt like ferris bueller singing on that parade float now. a black ferris bueller of course.
I'm also sorry you're in the situation you're in, Sema. You seem like a strong person, and you're clearly an awesome mom. It's not my place to say, but if it were me, I'd cut that husband loose and move on to improving your life and that of your daughter. You don't need someone who treats you badly and tells you you're fat and also shirks his family responsibility. That is not love, and that's not marriage. You don't want your daughter growing up with that, I'm sure.
And really, at the very least, you need to file for child support.
This is why we can't have nice things.
Also,
"The mean girl's mom just says stuff like - She just plays like a boy."
I have three sons. Boy's do not play like this. That is bullshit. There is a big difference between being rowdy and fearless and beating other kids up.
Kick her in the stomach and say that you're just playing. That'll show her!
Motherfucking of course.
Fucked up dreams all night, People keep offing themselves in my dreams and I wake up freaking out.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
"The mean girl's mom just says stuff like - She just plays like a boy."
I have three sons. Boy's do not play like this. That is bullshit. There is a big difference between being rowdy and fearless and beating other kids up.
I am totally going use that! Thanks Amber
Old me would have given up. New me, knows that isn't an option.
I've run out of steam for the moment. But, you guys have really picked me back up.
Noah, you need a vacation.
Yeah! Go Sema! You can kick these issue's asses! Don't let anyone bring you down!
Yesterday I got so thoroughly lost that I ended up in Grapevine. You probably don't know where Grapevine is but it's roughly half an hour away from where I wanted to be and half an hour away from anywhere I am even sort of familiar with. My GPS (which I almost never use) started taking me in a circle that was as large and traffic filled as it was useless to my mission of reaching a destination which involved a Very Important Interview.
I became so frustrated I started to cry. Like really, really hard. After spending two hours failing to do the thing that should've taken 30 minutes, found myself thinking of suicide and driving about 65 mph on a road where I should have been going 35. When I realized this, I stopped because what the fuck are you doing, Brain??? I mean, if you're going to kill me, whatever, but be less of a jerk about it. Why do you have to take out that school bus full of children to do it?
TL;DR - I have a terminal case of No-Spatial-Awareness. Or maybe just Stupidity. Either way, the townspeople will be safe for the rest of the week because I'm not touching the car for a while.
The holidays will do that to you Jessica. Buck up, lil' buckaroo!! Do you need a chauffeur? I volunteer Lib for the job.
Mike thanks! You better keep us posted on your projects. Even if you have a short attention span like (ahem) some of us, and move on to another project. We are interested. 
I'm getting hype now...gonna put on 'Eye of the Tiger' and shadow box. Nah, really I'm gonna probably try to find 'Xanadu' on line, and watch a bit of that. Works just as well for me.
Used to have white satin roller skate covers, like Olivia Newton John. 
The black muse's hair in Xanadu, is a total buzzkill. That's messed up. Looks like a dookie on top of her head. They never got it right in the stage production either. They had a chance to go all Donna Summers and glam her to Mars. Opportunity missed.
Gabriel just came and showed me something someone posted on 4chan on monday (that isn't where he saw it)
"Tomorrow watch the news, Clackamas Town Center"
Lovely world we live in.
Ha! I was just thinking, 'Damn, that's just the situation I was made for.'
I remember I once got lost in Grapevine, too. I mean, not for anywhere near 30 minutes, but I get it. We stayed at a resort called Gaylord. Their steak is unbelievable, and just what I needed after such a horrible driving adventure. First time driving in Dallas, too. The whole area's a nightmare.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
An Italian chef designed those roads, I tell ya what.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
I arrived to sign my lease today. Turns out the guy decided to completely forget he told me I'd pay for half of December and charged me for all of December at a rate that is higher than the rest of the months. We had a strong discussion about it, and he decided he could refund my "frais de dossier" which was 262 euros, and he promised to give me free washing machine tokens. I don't know how long that'll last, but in the end I only ended up paying 100 euros more than I thought, so it's not the end of the world. But the refrigerator in my room is dirty and smells horrible. I'm not opening it again until I get a chance to clean it.
I became so frustrated I started to cry. Like really, really hard. After spending two hours failing to do the thing that should've taken 30 minutes, found myself thinking of suicide and driving about 65 mph on a road where I should have been going 35. When I realized this, I stopped because what the fuck are you doing, Brain??? I mean, if you're going to kill me, whatever, but be less of a jerk about it. Why do you have to take out that school bus full of children to do it?
TL;DR - I have a terminal case of No-Spatial-Awareness. Or maybe just Stupidity. Either way, the townspeople will be safe for the rest of the week because I'm not touching the car for a while.
This is why I can't stand cars and roads. Going east? Go north. Going south? Go east. What am I, fucking Daenerys? It's a retardation of mankind's navigational instincts, but usually when the inventions of humanity annoy me I can walk off the road and into a forest and not have to deal with them, which is exactly what would happen if I ever have a car: If I get stuck in traffic, I'll just leave the fucker there and walk home. No way I could sit there and not move, chained to an automobile.
Until you have one of those GPS bitches locked into your body, like it or not, and your walks become "Going east? Next turn, fifteen kilometers. Turn. West. Straight." And when you veer off into the woods to confuse her, the absence of the roads just makes her see all roads at once and she tells you you're GOING EAST WEST NORTH SOUTH STRAIGHT TURN NEXT EXIT MILES REST STOP TOURIST ATTRACTION all at once and you die from an aneurism if some over-seeing deity somewhere has any remorse left at all.
Greensboro, North Carolina is the only town I've ever seen (of that big city size) that has roads which actually go in North, South, East, West direction.
If you want to go somewhere, just drive in that direction. At the most, you're only a street or two off course.
Very refreshing.
bk:The tiny village I live in is constructed of mazes. Its like a schizophrenia plaid helix. Maybe I should start wearing 3-D glasses when I drive, so it will make more sense.
Its designed for a bunch of rich people, to give the illusion of privacy, with all the twisty roads and landscaping. But, really they are dumb for overpaying for 3 tons of shrubs on a half acre of property that is practically on top of their neighbors and a busy street. Dumb.
The crime rate is low, though. Confuses crooks, I guess. Probably not. The young landscapers (oxycodine cowboys) probably know these roads better than anyone.
I don't even drive in my own village. I drive straight to the next town and do my errands there.
Where I live the roads go east / west & north / south. It's easy to figure out too because we have mile roads that go east west. And the more north you go the higher the mile road number. They say that Detroit roads were set up like a big wheel with spokes. The mile roads are the spokes? But I can never see it that way. Everything is pretty much just squares.
I live on 13 mile and Crooks rd. So I'm 4 miles north of the famous 8 mile rd - though I'm also more east than the Eminem movie. My Dad lives off of 21 mile. My Mom off of 19 mile. I have relatives off of 23 and 24 miles. My brother lives off of 12 mile.
Pete, that is seriously confusing and unecessary. We have signs that just say take this numbered interstate that is in the general direction of a city in the next state over and your destination will be at a numbered exit on the way.
For example - I live off of I-20. I don't care if it's East or West. I just know that if you're driving towards Birmingham it says I-20 to Birmingham and if I'm going in the opposite direction it says I-20 to Atlanta.
In Atlanta if I want to get to Drew's mom's I merge from I-20 to I-285 towards Chattanooga. If I get to Tennessee I've gone too far.
They're talking about maps on Fresh Air on NPR right now.
They really dumb down highway signs here. You'll see three or four signs for your exit before you even get to it. I heard that in Florida, there are no signs on the highway, you just have to know your exit.
When i first moved to Portland i used to carry the phone book with me everywhere because it had maps of everywhere in it, plus all the numbers I may ever need to call if I still got lost.
I don't worry about what the roads say, direction wise, anymore, I just rely on my own sense of direction. I know which way is North South East and West. If I get lost trying to find a destination I give up and take a look at the sky, decided which general direction I need to head to get home and go that way until things look familiar.
This only works when it is not pouring down rain.
I wasn't talking about the Interstate - Highways and Freeways. I was just talking about our streets and roads. It's very easy.
I get lost anytime I go into the city. I am slowly learning how to get around and the different landmarks. I have lived in the same area my whole life and still get lost.
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy
This is where I learned to drive.
Wow. You're tough.
Aw thanks, Sema.
I remember I once got lost in Grapevine, too. I mean, not for anywhere near 30 minutes, but I get it. We stayed at a resort called Gaylord. Their steak is unbelievable, and just what I needed after such a horrible driving adventure. First time driving in Dallas, too. The whole area's a nightmare.
Dude, I was lost for OVER AN HOUR. And I've been to Grapevine plenty, it's just that on top of the roads being Italian Chef designed, I don't have a sense of direction and if I lived on the frontier, I would've wandered off one day and never been heard from again.
For example, I knew I needed to go South and West. My GPS was telling me to circle a construction site like a vulture so I turned that shit off and just followed the signs. I finally, FINALLY thought I had my bearings and was going East.
Nope. I was going South the whole time and I didn't realize it until I pulled up to my house. That's right, I got home on accident.
I've seen the signs for Gaylord. And I giggle.
I'd agree with you if I had navigational instincts.
Actually, I still agree with you. At least on foot, I'd never end up in the wrong city. And if I did, the elements would eventually take me out of my misery.
That would be a great world.
Hey! Me too! I just live like 700 miles down the street.
"Tomorrow watch the news, Clackamas Town Center"
Lovely world we live in.
I hope it was just the kid himself posting it. Would be even more fucked if he told someone and they didn't say anything other than that.
For example, I knew I needed to go South and West. My GPS was telling me to circle a construction site like a vulture so I turned that shit off and just followed the signs. I finally, FINALLY thought I had my bearings and was going East.
Nope. I was going South the whole time and I didn't realize it until I pulled up to my house. That's right, I got home on accident.
It's said that it's better to be lucky than good. I mean, you weren't super lucky, but lucky enough to not actually get to the point of suicide. So there's that.
It's how they get so much business. It's also how they keep the rowdy, sexually insecure frat boys away.
Si vis pacem, para bellum
Today is one of those days.
I got up had a nice breakfast. Now I am dealing with Tmobile Xia shit. And a day at work with that sinking feeling.
SO lets talk more about this Classy porn we will make?
As your attorney, my advise to you is to start drinking heavily(er).-Tuffy