awful things that are also funny

No, it's because I think I'd avoid making Dad feel bad for not affording it, really, and it sounds better than saying 'Hey mum, hey dad, I kinda changed my mind, you know, because we don't really have the money, so..yeah, I'm staying.'
Or so I think. My plan is to wait until I have all the grades, which should be next week, and then I take the final decision - send the transcript to Warwick or lie to my parents and stay home.

Sad decisions that are also depressing.

I thoughts homosexuals counted as minorities.. After all, there are more heterosexuals.* 

* based on assumption.

All right my critics. I shall try again.

How do you turn a washing machine into a snow plow?

Give the bitch a shovel.

Have you guys heard of that new blonde paint? It's not very bright, but it's cheap, and it spreads easy.

And now for my finale....

A man finds a magic lamp. He rubs it, and would you believe it? A genie pops out!

You get three wishes, the genie says.

The man, wasting no time, says, I wish for the biggest and best house in the world!

The genie snaps his finger and a giant, gorgeous mansion appears. 

The man, overcome with joy, checks the place out. After a while, he realizes he'll never see the whole place in one day so he goes back to the genie.

Genie, he says. I wish that the hottest woman in the world was up in my room right now, ready for me to have my way with her.

The genie again snaps his fingers.

The man goes into the bedroom of his new mansion, and there lies the most beautiful woman the man had ever seen. He's just about to have sex with her when he remembers, he has one more wish.

So he goes back to the genie and whispers the last wish in the genie's ear.

Back up in his new bedroom with the hottest woman in the world, the man takes off his clothes and all the sudden, three members of the KKK barge in.

The man goes back to the genie.

Genie! What the hell? He demands.

What? the genie replies. You wished to be hung like a nigger!

Hahaha! Now THAT'S more like it!

Bravo.

You don't have the grade? I thought you'd all ready been accepted? Why are you making it sound like you're just backing out in PA?

I think she's saying that's what she'll tell her parents if she decides not to go so they won't feel bad.

Ah, thanks for clearing that up for me.

Everybody wants me to go to college except for me and every day I read another list about how college is a waste of time and a scam.

You'll have a better chance of not working at places like Big Lots if you go.

This.

I meant to post this in PA but whatever.

I'm trying my hardest to get film work and get a real career going but everybody seems intent on taking that away from me, saying, "No! You have to waste 2-4 years at college learning how to do a job you have absolutely no interest in that won't guarantee you a job so that once you get out you'll be right back at square one only now you'll be spending the rest of your life paying off student loans!"

And sometimes they encourage me to go to film school which is an even bigger waste of time and money because no studio gives a shit if you went to film school or not. Why spend thousands of dollars to listen to some guy who has probably never directed a thing in his life lecture me on how to do things "right" when I can just get a job on a film, get experience, and make real connections?

Granted the finding a job part of that plan isn't going quite well but I'm doing better. I got two genuine credits, one as a PA for the costume dept. and the other for being an intern at the production office. On top of that I got my sister always asking around and sending me production reports with names and numbers for me to call and I just got accepted into this FB group for local PA's. You usually need a recommendation from at least 2 AD's to get accepted but my sister knows the group admin so I got a free pass.

All things considered, it's getting better, inch by inch. Nobody sees it though, they just keep reminding me how much radiologists make a year and keep suggesting I go learn graphic design because you know if I can copy/paste without tearing my hair out I can surely design web pages from scratch right?

I have 3 more grades to find out for this semester. There's virtually no chance that I don't make the cut, I need an 8.67 per this semester, I will get a 9.33 most likely. What I'm saying is that if I decide not to go, I'll tell my parents I didn't get the grade I needed anyway.

Not funny Irina. You'll regret it for the rest of your life.

I stayed in Romania for college because there was a slight chance to be together with the guy I loved. I regretted it for a while, then got over it. Maybe. It won't be that bad, probably.

No, I'm with mike on this one, if you don't go to Warwick you will regret it for the rest of your life.

Wow, I didn't laugh at any of the ones I read. I think that kind of stuff is just tasteless and rude. Kind of disgusting actually. I think it takes very small minded people to tell jokes like that, who get a kick out of being offensive in order to surprise.

You seem like a good guy Pete, don't post that kind of thing, it's crass.

Well, the pic was meant to go along with what Mike was talking about.

And, really, I think words only have the power that you give them. A lot of my friends are black, they would never be offended by a black joke - unless it was directed at them in anger. My favorite uncle as a kid came out of the closet and admitted he was gay and then died shortly after of AIDS. Do gay jokes or AIDS jokes bother me? Nah. I'm secure enough in my beliefs to also be able to laugh at them.

But I do understand why somebody would find them insulting or offensive. So, I'm sorry if it offended you. That wasn't my intention. I hope you still think I'm a nice guy.

That's okay, it's not that I'm offended, I just don't think they're funny, it's more like I get annoyed by how they are tasteless and are intended to shock. I'm not pissed off or anything, I just wanted to voice my opinion on such jokes. Sorry for being serious, I was tired and crabby this morning.

It's cool. We're still friends.

I have a small brain because I laugh at some pretty crude and tasteless things. Most times it's nervous laughter and I have no idea how else to react.

I feel I should mention, I've told the black joke I posted here to black acquaintances in the past. They thought it was funny. One went on to tell his friend.

I didn't feel like I HAD to post the above statement. But just thought I'd mention it.

I wouldn't, however, ever say it to my sister in law. She is black and VERY touchy on things like that. She was even offended when she saw the play, Anything Goes. I had performed it in my church years before she saw it. But in it, there are two Chinese stereotype characters usually played by white guys.

This is more of a creepy/nervous laughter than funny

hahahahaha that shit was fucking gangsta yo!

Seriously though, she had some pretty good lines.