Actual conversations...

I started by sitting in front of the window one day when I was four, reading "PULA" (dick, in Romanian) out loud, and mum heard me and was like 'what? who taught you that?'. And I said 'but it's written out there, on the wall!'

She then proceeded to explain that it's not nice to use that word and taught me the other one.

This is an acutal conversation a parent I know had with their child.

Child: Daddy, do you work for a cow?
D: What?
C: Do you work for a cow, Daddy?
D: What are you talking about?
C: That sign says "Do you work for a cow?"

The child was 3 and his parents had no idea he could read until this moment they happened to be drving past a sign for some jobseeking website.

Three is quite young to know how to read without your parents being aware of it. Who taught him, do you know?

Daycare asked my parents what method they used.

"Used to what?"
"To teach him to read?"
"... He's three! He can't read!"
"Um..."

I had read a book to the whole class earlier that day.

Show offs.

My mum taught me. Neither of my siblings got the same treatment later, my brother learned how to read in the first grade and my sister when she was 6-ish.

I'm always confused as to what silly books my sister reads these days. Crappy vampire series the likes of Disney Channel shows, and it sucks. I had read LOTR AND The Silmarillion at her age.

I learned to read at three as well, but I had a dedicated teacher at home that devoted time everyday to reading to me and giving me lessons. So yes, surprising that a child that young could read without a parental figure devoting energy to the matter, let alone not even being aware that the child was learning at all.

Gabriel it took all of one fifteen minute lesson when he was four, after he knew by heart all of the letters and the sounds they made. We were waiting for an appointment and he was bored so I wrote a few simple words, thinking I'd start teaching him a bit more than just the individual letters, then sentences explaining to blend the sounds together and it clicked instantly, before we got out of the car he had learned more complex letter combinations, like sh and th and tion and the different phonics between how to know vowel combinations. It was amazing.

I was thrown completely off when Trevor struggled to learn.

I read girly books about horses and ballet. Be happy she reads!

In her defense, she read The Hunger Games and I didn't.

His parents read a lot to him. I think they knew he knew a few words, like in books he knew really well. But they had no idea he had the comprehension.

That's soooooo cool, I would be over the moon if my kid could read when they're 3, they did good there.
I was probably 4, I went to a private school but it closed down and when I left when I was about 5 and had to go to normal school I'd completed their whole comprehension/English curriculum, for real. We all had. One girl from the private school was there with me and for English we were just allowed to read whatever we wanted in another room and do cross stitch and stuff.

I don't think I was reading any earlier than usual. I bet I was walking before all you mofos though. 8 months, what what!

I just want to be included.

I could be wrong about the 8 months thing too. It might have been 18. Whichever sounds most plausible, what what!

I definitely wasn't gifted. Private school was so different, I don't know how they managed to fit everything in, we did gymnastics and elocution lessons and music.

We had school from 8:30am to 4:30pm and then on Saturday mornings til lunchtime. Urgh.

Elocution lessons? Wowza! Did you have to learn Welsh? A girl at my work went to a school where all her lessons were taught in Welsh.

We didn't at private school but in normal schools we did some basic Welsh lessons. My little cousin goes to a Welsh school and speaks fluent Welsh - he's 7 - and none of the rest of us can!

In third grade my teacher stuck me in one of the middle reading groups, based purely on my out loud reading ability. She didn't test my actual comprehension at all.

I remember being constantly frustrated with the other kids in my group.

But then we got to name our own reading groups, and all the other groups picked names like "The Cheetahs" and "The Dolphins" and other attempts at badass or cool names. My group settled on "The Fleas", so that made things a little better.

Then, when I started Kindergarten, they used to take me out of class into the firstgraders room during their reading lessons. That only lasted a little while because it turned out that I was beyond them. Then they took me to the school's library for two hours a day and turned me loose. In the end, the librarian put me to work, shelving and organizing books and checking books in and out for the older kids.

Well that sounds like fun.

I loved it.

That is what I want to do now.

I've been thinking about it for too long, need some action.

I'm going to just have to start walking everywhere, oh well if there is a mile of hills between here and public transportation. Can't handle being in this empty house all day every day any longer.

Throw her presents in the closet... a mild stomach haunting... it's like the internet in a book...

I'm cracking up over here. I should really check this thread more often.

I asked my mom how old I was when I learned to read, she doesn't know. How awesome of her. But I do know I taught myself addition at three.

Now she says she thinks I was three, but she isn't sure.

Have I told y'all about the little girl my sister used to nanny? Her name was Maren and at two years old she was speaking in full sentences. She would say things like "I think I'd like to take a nap now." Six months before that she knew who was calling my sister by the ringtone. She associated mornings with my sister and I talking on the phone. If we didn't talk Maren would say, "Call Melody?"

One day, I'm not sure how old she was at this point, she said to my sister, "I like Melody because her name starts with the same letter at mine." I'm pretty sure she had never seen my name written down.

This kid was a genius and the saddest thing was the parents didn't even have her in a gifted preschool. Hopefully she has teachers who recognize how smart she is very soon and push her parents to put her in a special program.

We don't have gifted preschools but my mum bought a lot of books about gifted children and all. I don't know when I started to lazy around and waste everything.

Actual phone conversation, classmate of mine and her dad. Her birthday is on Saturday, this took place yesterday:

Dad: Hi, how are you? Having fun?
Her: No dad, I just had an exam.
Dad: On your birthday?
Her: Dad, what day is today?
Dad: Isn't it the 13th?
Her: No, it's the 9th, and my birthday is on the 12th.

Then it turned irrelevant, but seriously, what the fuck? Her parents are divorced, but she was still pretty pissed about it.

I've had my parents and grandparents forget about my birthday on several occasions. I learned not to give a fuck anymore. The first time it happened I turned 16...I thought I was being punked into feeling like I was gonna get trapped in a real life 16 candles moment. Luckily my mom called me a little after dropping me off to wish me a happy birthday and apologized for forgetting.

Your parents acknowlege your birthdays?

Weird.

My mom "gets the flu" every year on my birthday and I hear from her a week or two later.

At this point the biggest insult is that she won't come up with a new lie. Doesn't seem to remember she used that on last year, and the year before and before and before...

I wanna throw you all surprise birthday parties.

Pffft, good luck getting Tuffy's birthday out of him.

Oh is he hiding it from us?

Tell us your birthday Tuff.

yeah. I think so too.

My birthday is kind of hard to forget, or miss by losing track of days, for anyone close to me too, being on a holiday the whole world is making noise about the day.

My birthday is July 15th.

That's a relief. I thought I'd just made up a day to decide to wish you happy birthday on the past few years, and everyone else made up the same day and sent wishes too.

Or it could be that.

NO IT DOESN'T SHUT UP I HATE YOU ! ! !

Was she referencing that that would make you a cancer? (I think?)

Because I decided to believe that is all a bunch of phooey some years ago but Lily is a cancer and the above sounds exactly like her.

C: "Anybody here like sweet white wine?"
B: "I do!"
Imke: "I do as well!"
B: "German and cute*? Yes, please!"

*The Norwegian word for sweet is "søt", which can also be used for "cute".

Me and my daughter talking after dinner...
me:We probably have a lot of mannerisms that are similar, that we do all the time.
g:Yeah we probably don't even know it.
me:'Cause I'm cool, and I'm hip, and I'm jive turkey cool! You want to be just like me. *snapping fingers to a beat*
g:I'm going to be just like you, so sad. hahhaha!

G:Momma, your sweater is so (muffled sound).
me:What? Easy?
G:Your sweater is so (muffled sound)
me:Beasy?...?
G:(silence, shakes head)
me:(sighing in agreement) I'd give up too, if I were you.
G:I SAID YOUR SWEATER IS SO INDIE!!!!
me:Oh. hahah!

You know you're ancient, when you finally hear them say you are "Hip." And try to remember if you have taken you calcium that day. Because the word hip reminds you of Osteoporosis.

Nice.

Watching Blue Valentine

Her: He looks pretty old.
Me: Yeah he aged poorly. Well, as poorly as Ryan Gosling could, which isn't poorly at all.
Her: Would you stop, that is so annoying.
Me: I can't help it, look at him.
Her: I wish you were Ryan Gosling.
Me: So do i.

Perfect conversation.

Man I tell my boyfriend (hmm) that I wish he was Ryan Gosling almost every day and he just says Ryan Gosling is obviously a dick which is bullshit.

Wow, what an absolutely useless reaction. I always have to laugh when people insult others because of jealousy.