A MAN APART
hi, my name is small_fire, you may remember me from such posts as THE CORE...and my oh, so witty response to the PETA thread...well, friends, i am back to tell you about another wonderfully bad movie called
[SIZE=4]A MAN APART[/SIZE]
Now, you may ask yourself a few questions like
1. who the hell is small_fire
2. why does she see such bad movies?
3. why does she feel the need to tell us about them?
4. why am i reading this post?
well, i can't answer any of those questions.
but i can tell you how very, very bad A MAN APART is.
sweet baby jesus, is it bad.
i hate vin diseal. i really really do. (i havent seen pitch black and i hear that is okay...but i think he is gross, and he takes up far too much space (literally) on this planet)
I went because I thought it would be funny, and as there are many stupid parts in this movie that prove to be funny...there are far too many stupid parts that are not funny that leave you reaching into you bag of gummy bears praying that the theater will catch on fire and save you from this torture that is, A MAN APART.
If I had to see A MAN APART or THE CORE again, I would probably choose THE CORE. THE CORE is pretty much all stupid/funny, while A MAN APART is pretty much all stupid.
but one thing is to be said for/against A MAN APART...it does have the most overtly and unashamed homophobic scene in any movie...EVER.
the end.
[URL=http://www.lowellsun.com/Stories/0,1413,105~4861~1298813,00.html]this is the most hilarious movie review I've ever read.[/URL]
[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]
[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]
Worse than The Core?
...man.
[SIZE=1][COLOR=MediumTurquoise]i respect your honesty, but i detest what you're being honest about[/COLOR].[/SIZE]
kitty, that's a pretty good review, however i have to disagree on one point.
he says that diesel (notice my corrected spelling, even though im still not sure if its correct) never gets hurt....
au contraire.
one of the most brilliant scenes in the movie is when he and his ex-gang banger buddy get hurt on the way out of this big shootout near the end...
diesel gets his leg shot and they spend like, 5 minutes, hobbling around outside in the rain...getting up, falling down, getting up, falling down.
"now, small_fire," you might say "5 minutes isn't really that long...is it?"
well my friends, you have to remember that we are on bad movie time, which transcends all previous notions of time.
bad movie time is kinda like dog years. so five mintues is more like eleventy billion hours.
it would be awesome if vin diesel got nominated for an oscar for this movie and won.
[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by small_fire [/i]
[B]it would be awesome if vin diesel got nominated for an oscar for this movie and won. [/B][/QUOTE]
It would be awesome?
yes, i would throw a big party that would consist of me and all my friends re-enacting some of vin's greatest moments.
we would drink booze and gaze at the sea, we would snowboard down an avalanche.
WE WOULD BECOME VIN DIESEL AND HONOR THE BRILLIANT ACTOR INSIDE ALL OF US!!!
Seems like small_fire rocks my socks. Since I've never spoken to you before, welcome to the forums and continure to rock my socks. Please.
"Vin Diesel is the type of actor who makes you think of all the other, more interesting actors that are out there, like Keanu Reeves or Shaquille O'Neal. This is not a good thing."
Best part of the review! hahaha that makes me laugh my arse off. And I'm not even British!
hooray! i'll do what i can buddy.
yeah it's a great, great review, and for that, vin deisel may live.
[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]
[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]
"Seems like small_fire rocks my socks. Since I've never spoken to you before, welcome to the forums and continure to rock my socks. Please."
Ditto.
"a misspent youth spent gang-banging"
Man, is it just me, or is that way funny?
wow. who knew vin diesel could bring in so much love? many thanks.
this makes wasting my ENTIRE day online and refusing to do any homework kinda worth it!
REV IT INTO THIRD!!! <-----he says it somewhere in every movie, sort of like Arnold's infamous "GET DOWN" that he uses ad naseum.
"The things I do for my country." <--- brilliant
"ooooh i like this." <----oscar caliber
ok im done
Then again, I might be wrong.
[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by leonardshelby [/i]
[B]"Vin Diesel is the type of actor who makes you think of all the other, more interesting actors that are out there, like Keanu Reeves or Shaquille O'Neal. This is not a good thing."
Best part of the review! hahaha that makes me laugh my arse off. And I'm not even British! [/B][/QUOTE]
Hilarious. I couldn't agree with you more.
[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by insomnomaniac [/i]
[B]yeah it's a great, great review, and for that, vin deisel may live. [/B][/QUOTE]
Haha, he's our own personal court jester. Kinda like Bush, only less destructive. I know you won't agree with me, but this is the same reason I think G-Dub should be kept alive. There have been some great SNL skits over these last 3 years. Not in office, mind you, just alive.
small_fire, i nominate you to be the official (bad) movie reviewer of this site. you've saved me at least 50 bones in movie-related costs (tix, $35 for a small bottle of water, etc.), which i can then reappropriate for my alcoholic beverage fund. and the real entertainment comes from the review anyway.
now here's a question: is vin diesel today's action "hero"?? is there no one else we can look to for "x-treme" stunts and huge explosions???
ANDY GRIFFITH
hey, explain the homophobic scene. i aint seen it none.
[COLOR=black][SIZE=1]i still have nothing better to say[/SIZE] [/COLOR]
[IMG]http://www.geocities.com/rip_purr_edit_encircle/award.jpg[/IMG]
Hey, Vin was pretty good in The Iron Giant...
One dimensional dross without an ounce of direction.
[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by framstedt [/i]
[B]One dimensional dross without an ounce of direction. [/B][/QUOTE]
The Iron Giant??? It's a cartoon.
was vin the voice of the iron giant??
Yes, moe. Yes, he was.
dang...that movie came out years ago! was he still a teen-ager?
is the robot all dumb-sounding?
He rocked in Saving Private Ryan, specially the part when he got shot.
Fuckin Caparzo and his soft heart!
Suck me beautiful...
[QUOTE][i]Originally posted by moe.ron [/i]
[B]dang...that movie came out years ago! was he still a teen-ager?[/B][/QUOTE]
It didn't come out _that_ long ago... 4, 5 years, maybe? And, he's not exactly in his twenties or anything...
[B][QUOTE] is the robot all dumb-sounding? [/B][/QUOTE]
Heh. Well, yeah, kinda... It's mostly a sorta "Rar rar rar!" kinda thing for much of the time.
Iron Giant's actually one of the better "children's movies" I've seen in a long time.
how old *is* that mfer?? i thought he was in his 20s...
can you imagine the direction for iron giant? "that's great vin, but let's do the rar rar again, but with more feeling this time!"
he was great in boiler room, although it was a type-casting.
The IMDB lists him as 35. Meaning that he could actually be older, since actors often 'underage' themselves to maximize bankability. Iron Giant [i]did[/i] come out "ages" ago - 1999.
The IMDB already lists [b]XXX2[/b] with a release date of 2005. Executive Producer - Vin Diesel.
yes, he was very good in SPR. unfortunately, beyond the character of caparzo, what truly substantive roles could he play?
[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]
[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]
"Rocky XIII"???
Vin is a horrible actor. Thats all im going to say and also, he can never replace Arnold as the best all around action hero.
You know im going to lose
Gamblings for fools
But thats the way i like it
I dont want to live forever
Yes. Ahnuld is a much better actor.
i'd like to see the rock be the next action hero. at least he makes no pretention of being able to speak.
[SIZE=1][QUOTE=ehquestionmark]Wow. This little thread got CRAZY. People telling me to abuse my girlfriend, people showing an alarming lack of respect for women as a whole, people questioning my masculinity in some kind of bizarre machoistic pissing-contest. Hell, I even got called stuffy. [/QUOTE]
[URL=http://confessionalpoe.blogspot.com]Grand Mental Station[/URL]
[URL=http://www.chuckpalahniuk.net/community/showthread.php?t=15714&highlight=interview+insomnomaniac]Insomnomaniac: the found interview[/URL][/SIZE]
YOU ARE STUPID AND GAY!!11