Are you making a web site for the hooker? I mean, I know it's for the hooker, but is it a web site for and about her?

yea who else?

well excuse me for thinking that a hooker might have an interest in starting a Tron fansite.

Hookers have websites?

[QUOTE=Barca Boy;1024960]Hookers have websites?[/QUOTE]
Yeah, I thought they just posted on Craig's List.

Have you no ethics?

Oh and I think the only hookers that like Chuck are Happy Hookers.

shudder

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1024936]ok im supposed to do a website for a very fellatious woman in turn she'll do her job
this is what i need to do (she said)
i have to come up with a full website
it has to have animation in the intro
there has to be a multimedia section
there has to be a picture section

thats it then im in hoe heaven
can anyone help me out? i hear her head is amazing
and please spare me a lecture about ethics[/QUOTE]
Bananas, kid. Your whole fucking act.

[QUOTE=tomstrong83;1024958]well excuse me for thinking that a hooker might have an interest in starting a Tron fansite.[/QUOTE]Hookers that dress like Tron, now that would be cool.

[QUOTE=bigshrimpn;1025050]Oh and I think the only hookers that like Chuck are Happy Hookers.[/QUOTE]

i cannot be the only one.

I moved this because um, yeah. It needed to be moved.

Ho 2.0

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1024936]
and please spare me a lecture about ethics[/QUOTE]

It's not your ethics I'm worried about, it's how sad you are.

[QUOTE=Barca Boy;1024960]Hookers have websites?[/QUOTE]

haha true.

why the hell does she need a website? what;s wrong with lingering on street corners like the good old days?

and surely a website makes her pornstar now?

[QUOTE=xec8;1025283]It's not your ethics I'm worried about, it's how sad you are.[/QUOTE]

or how smart i am prick. you try and convince a hoe to suck dick for a website and see how far you get
they dont call themselves hookers anymore, they're called escorts for legal reasons. look up escorts they're in the phonebook mo-fo.

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1024936]ok im supposed to do a website for a very fellatious woman in turn she'll do her job
this is what i need to do (she said)
i have to come up with a full website
it has to have animation in the intro
there has to be a multimedia section
there has to be a picture section

thats it then im in hoe heaven
can anyone help me out? i hear her head is amazing
and please spare me a lecture about ethics[/QUOTE]

On a scale of 1-10 how nice is this hooker?
I mean does anyone know a hooker as nice as Elizabeth Shue in Leaving Las Vegas?

Damn, Mike beat me to the Happy Hooker joke...

Which I would have done better anyway.

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1025678]or how smart i am prick. you try and convince a hoe to suck dick for a website and see how far you get
they dont call themselves hookers anymore, they're called escorts for legal reasons. look up escorts they're in the phonebook mo-fo.[/QUOTE]

This is just a bad business move. I design websites, and I charge at least $50/hour for it. Most full sites like the one you're describing get into the $2000-$3000 range. She can't be that good.

But also, since you're posting the request here, I have to assume you know dick about web design and are hoping someone throws you a bone so you can throw one to her.

Here's an idea - save your pennies and try to find a nice girl with all of her teeth and no meth addiction.

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1025678]or how smart i am prick. you try and convince a hoe to suck dick for a website and see how far you get
they dont call themselves hookers anymore, they're called escorts for legal reasons. look up escorts they're in the phonebook mo-fo.[/QUOTE]
Shit, you're so right. I feel foolish.

Can a person get a venereal disease virtually? My hard drive itches...

[QUOTE=monkeywright;1025701]This is just a bad business move. I design websites, and I charge at least $50/hour for it. Most full sites like the one you're describing get into the $2000-$3000 range. She can't be that good.

But also, since you're posting the request here, I have to assume you know dick about web design and are hoping someone throws you a bone so you can throw one to her.

Here's an idea - save your pennies and try to find a nice girl with all of her teeth and no meth addiction.[/QUOTE]

wow 20 replies and no help
i dont need to know what you do for a living, if you do sites 2000-3000 per then doing a site with those basic things should be a brain fart shouldn't it?
i just dont want to apply myself off the basic priciple that if i do it this way, the head will feel that much better. you must've no read the original post if i do this i get FREE HEAD! even if i do get a girl around the way she wont give me head. you'll be doing a civil duty (haha duty) to your fellow brother in need.

How many accounts has Ironman?

it's not [I]free[/I] if it's in exchange for a website.

and do you have to be the webmaster of this website, because it's sounding more and more like she's making you into her little bitch...

go pay for it like everyone else and reclaim your dignity!! Better yet find a girlfriend and relax safe in the knowledge you don't have to use HTML or Dreamweaver just get to laid.

rant over.

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1024936]and please spare me a lecture about ethics[/QUOTE]

follow directions

[QUOTE=chad orr;1025767]Can a person get a venereal disease virtually? My hard drive itches...[/QUOTE]

damed Viruses, they are in the girls and in the web, it seems the only safe sex is phone sex, But who enjoys safe sex? thats why i never use a condon!

Why doesn't she find some guy with website-making skills and better English, and suck his dick instead?

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1025810]wow 20 replies and no help
i dont need to know what you do for a living, if you do sites 2000-3000 per then doing a site with those basic things should be a brain fart shouldn't it?
i just dont want to apply myself off the basic priciple that if i do it this way, the head will feel that much better. you must've no read the original post if i do this i get FREE HEAD! even if i do get a girl around the way she wont give me head. you'll be doing a civil duty (haha duty) to your fellow brother in need.[/QUOTE]

Those aren't "basic things".

Anyway, here's your website (cut and paste into a notepad doc and save as "desperateLoser.html" Upload to a server, and voila! It, like you, will look very simple onscreen.

[CODE]

Please help me end mah virgnaty!11!

I want thiss gurl to suk mah dik so bad

Hi. I'm a loser that wants someone else to do hours of work for me so I can get laid with an ugley hooker

looka what she gets! I'm so hot for her

I want her VD so bad. If you are lookn at this site she give you VD too.

[/CODE]

i dont have to copy paste it to know its a spoof page
its not spanish you dip-shit i can read what the fucking code says
and how can i get a venerial disease if im nowhere near her venerial area

You can contract HERPES mouth to dick. There are more. Shall I name them?

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1025940]i dont have to copy paste it to know its a spoof page
its not spanish you dip-shit i can read what the fucking code says
and how can i get a venerial disease if im nowhere near her venerial area[/QUOTE]

That code in no way presents itself as a sham front for a legitimate business in the hopes of stealing sensitive information. Hence, it is not a spoof page. Coder humor! ROFLDORKS!

Also, it is genuine, workable code. You COULD try to reverse engineer it into a workable page for your hoooooor.

its not like they cant get tested
escorts make a LOT of money so they get tested monthly and can screen their clientele. almost all of them demand for you to put a condom on because after all if they get an std then that's their bread and butter.

fuck it
i'll do it myself
there are too many people riding my nuts

Wow.

Just ... wow.

You have blown my mind.

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1026023]
fuck it
i'll do it myself[/QUOTE]

You're going to suck your own dick?

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1024936]and please spare me a lecture about ethics[/QUOTE]

What about morals, huh dirtbag?!
:censored:
:censored:
:censored:
:censored:
:censored:

[QUOTE=Nightrious;1026146]You're going to suck your own dick?[/QUOTE]

no
the website

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1025678]or how smart i am prick. you try and convince a hoe to suck dick for a website and see how far you get
they dont call themselves hookers anymore, they're called escorts for legal reasons. look up escorts they're in the phonebook mo-fo.[/QUOTE]

I think I'd make sure I had some mad website skillz before I offered to do that in exchange for anything, much less a bj. It is pretty pathetic though that you have to do anything to pay to get head instead of get it voluntarily for free. You don't happen to go by the moniker of Fred Cherry, do you?

PS here is a [URL=http://www.thewillpower.org/]useful instructional video[/URL] (NSFW) where you can learn what you should go do, as well as the reason why some guys wear their baseball caps backwards.

Can we see the website when its finished?

[QUOTE=Barca Boy;1026202]Can we see the website when its finished?[/QUOTE]

Hah!!!! Awesome.

Why just a blowjob? If you're gonna stoop to unconventional practices like this, why not go for a full shag and throw in a chatroom as a bonus?

[QUOTE=Nightrious;1026146]You're going to suck your own dick?[/QUOTE]

R
O
F
L

Her lips glistened ruby, her tongue poised at the tips of her teeth. That mouth, that mouth was made for sucking.

"What you strollin' by here fo', big boy?" Her pasty white cheeks blushed rouge. Her eyes were pried wide open--emerald corneas, a thin ring around her large, floating retina.
And those lips. Those lips.

"Sensitive little men like you don't end up on my corner by accident." Bone thin, her chalky skin sucked tight to muscle. Her bicep flexed and writhed long as her sickle fingers descended down that nipple-perked tank top, six-pack abs, hungry stomach, inny bellybutton, black leather mini-skirt.

“You wanta lil’ lovin’, Suga’.”

My hands were stuffed deep in my pockets, down at the bottom seam rolling lint balls. Chin to chest I stared at the concrete, my street soot sneakers.

“Look at me, Suga. Stand straight.” Her press-on fingernails clawed up her milky, scab-speckled thighs. They snagged the bottom of her mini-skirt and lifted it waist high. Pantiless, shaved, milky and pock-marked.

“Is this what yo’ out here in th’ cold lookin’ fo’?” Those lips, they spoke to me again. I stuttered back…

“..yes…”

Her skirt dropped down, her stilted stilettos sauntered to me and she’s whispering in my ear.

“Lets go get a room on over. You can take me in there and we’ll lie down. Alright, Suga?”

“….I, I don’t have any money…”

“Don’t have any money?” Her voice raised from whisper to blow-horn. “You think I just fuck fo’ fun? I’m just here cause I’m HORNEY? Bitch please.”

“i can pay you… in other ways…” It just came stammering out. A thought not thought out. Only spoken.

“What can you do fo’ me, you sorry sack of shit?”

“…i…i can build you a web sight…”

*applause*

Nice one Chad.

you know what
this was the stupidest idea
to think that people like me would do work im to lazy to do. honestly if i were you guys i'd be bashing myself too.
"brlabrlabrla" meet a girl you actually like "brlablbrla" im too lazy to give a guy a leg up "brlabrlabrla" he said dont lecture me about ethics but i'll make a website that insults him and type paragraph long stories because thats how much i dont like hookers and ADD is a bitch

"i hate this dirtbag's ethics," but books that talk about cumming in clam chowder are fascinating an OK with me.

you know what maybe i am pathetic and have little to no conversational skills with the opposite sex. but at least i can follow directions. any retard with an A+ certificate can make a basic fucking website. i mean if im pathetic then you guys must be fucking crapbags to devote that much time to a wasteoid like me

fuckbags like you in the world are why us nice guys dont have girlfriends. i asked in THE most polite tone. but hey maybe i dont devote the time needed for a girlfriend. i just have to work on that. its too late for you assholes but im young, fertile and very agile.

Get an avatar!

o yea forgot about that
uppin it now

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1026437]you know what
this was the stupidest idea
to think that people like me would do work im to lazy to do. honestly if i were you guys i'd be bashing myself too.
"brlabrlabrla" meet a girl you actually like "brlablbrla" im too lazy to give a guy a leg up "brlabrlabrla" he said dont lecture me about ethics but i'll make a website that insults him and type paragraph long stories because thats how much i dont like hookers and ADD is a bitch

"i hate this dirtbag's ethics," but books that talk about cumming in clam chowder are fascinating an OK with me.

you know what maybe i am pathetic and have little to no conversational skills with the opposite sex. but at least i can follow directions. any retard with an A+ certificate can make a basic fucking website. i mean if im pathetic then you guys must be fucking crapbags to devote that much time to a wasteoid like me

fuckbags like you in the world are why us nice guys dont have girlfriends. i asked in THE most polite tone. but hey maybe i dont devote the time needed for a girlfriend. i just have to work on that. its too late for you assholes but im young, fertile and very agile.[/QUOTE]

:sadwavey:

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1026450]o yea forgot about that
uppin it now[/QUOTE]

Now that youve got an avatar people will take you much more seriously.

[QUOTE=Barca Boy;1026482]Now that youve got an avatar people will take you much more seriously.[/QUOTE]

Don't be so sure. I think now we'll just have something else to refer to him by other than calling him that guy, what's his name, the hooker guy, douchbag 3000 or whatever.

[QUOTE=drsmrgn3000;1026437]you know what
this was the stupidest idea
to think that people like me would do work im to lazy to do. honestly if i were you guys i'd be bashing myself too.
"brlabrlabrla" meet a girl you actually like "brlablbrla" im too lazy to give a guy a leg up "brlabrlabrla" he said dont lecture me about ethics but i'll make a website that insults him and type paragraph long stories because thats how much i dont like hookers and ADD is a bitch

"i hate this dirtbag's ethics," but books that talk about cumming in clam chowder are fascinating an OK with me.

you know what maybe i am pathetic and have little to no conversational skills with the opposite sex. but at least i can follow directions. any retard with an A+ certificate can make a basic fucking website. i mean if im pathetic then you guys must be fucking crapbags to devote that much time to a wasteoid like me

fuckbags like you in the world are why us nice guys dont have girlfriends. i asked in THE most polite tone. but hey maybe i dont devote the time needed for a girlfriend. i just have to work on that. its too late for you assholes but im young, fertile and very agile.[/QUOTE]
I think you'll find that nice guys don't finger their sleeping cousins, and that many regulars here don't have romantic partners either. Don't be hard on yourself. Check out The Game or something.