methhead girl
It is fall. And I am sitting with n 18 year old girl on the steps of a church across from Macdonald's. We are shareing a cheese burger. It is damp out side and the streets look cold and unforgiving. Even the golden arches look sinister in the mood of the street. which is a shame and a reality.
“you know what I think the best part of getting high is.” says the girl in her customary spaced out way.
“no.” I say with a trying sympathetic tone. “I don’t get high. Really.”
“Well it is not the not eating. And it is not the not sleeping. I love both of that stuff.” and she looks at me, and smiles. I smile back. “it is the act of it. The smoking of it.”
“don’t do it too much.” I say. “puts holes in your brain.”
“lots of things put holes in your brain.” she outlandishly offers. “everyone is so dead set against meth.” she adds in a sarcastic mockery of these people who think crystal meth is an evil—I am one of these people. I am being mocked.
“I was talking to a guy that was a meth head for a long time and he said that he found it hard to talk and shit after he quit—said that his brain started to liquidize or something like that.” she offers me some cheese burger. I take some.
“ever wonder why they call it Jib?” she asks. Thinking she is schooling me.
“because if you do it long enough you only talk gibberish?”
“yah.”
we sit watching the mist of the night come across the park. I blow my nose into a napkin and she nestles her head into my chest. I am thinking the whole time what a sad scene what a sad state of affairs . And the more you dissect and plunge into the depths of the situation the more sad and daunting and mocking and rabid it becomes—gnawing and tearing the city to shreds and turning a generation into a hopped up bunch of dead at 25’s.
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your little bit there is crap, stop glamorizing drugs and stay away from tweakers.
true in a way. I am at a rehab right now. doing a 12 step program--I am reminded of scenes from FIGHT CLUB. Alot of that is metaphor in fight club. A massive one. I have to say that I DO feel for people that are addicted to these drugs that are soooo adictive. Meth is a huge problem. I am a drunk. That is it. but I met the girl in the story whiule I was in victoria BC about a year ago--she is clean now I think
oh yeah, i've been in many rehabs, tell me about it, where are you?
in halifax. it is part of salvation army. the god stuff is what is going to make the steps more hard fpr me.
I don't feel that glamorizes it--I 5thought it was a pretty negative piece of wrting about meth
yeah maybe. is this residential rehab?
I can't say I enjoyed this.
It felt to me like a conversation on msn with someone about what happened last friday than a short story, or piece of proper writing.
I don't see any underlying point to this, I get it that you're saying meth isn't too hot, and that it begets a sad state of affairs, but that's all said, and that's all said quickly.
So to sum it all up, it seems like you make a conversation, showing the different opinions of meth, and then paint a bit of a picture based on how unfortunate the circumstances are and etcetera all in one paragraph at the end...
Meh, not my preffered poison I suppose, but keep at it.
I can't really help you in terms of writing, I can just say that it felt pointless in the end.
Was that written as you posted or, or is it older? About the end, I'd say it slows too much in the last paragraph. Try not to repeat yourself too much.
Syd Barrett, whose drug of choice was acid, talked ery positively about the fact that he had to think and do less and less the more shiite he put in his body. A reporter asked him if he'd become a vegetable and he said enthusiastically, "Yeah!"
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I protest not getting a signature by writing this after each post.
"They sold you hippies grunge, hip hop, now liberty activism."
yeah this is an older peice of wrting--hey the 16 year old that commented saying it was pointless---just wait and you'll find out life, yeah it is all kind of pointless kid
My philosophical beliefs allow me to know that and get on with my life.
But this isn't about life, it's about your writing and the message you likely attempted to push with it, which in my opinion was pointless.
I am scared of reading his story. I may become him.
No offence Alexanderdude, but you're not Bret Easton Ellis, this isn't the 80's, and there's no need for another Less Than Zero.
That said, don't give up on the writing - to be writing at all is the main thing, eventually you'll come to a point where your work is more in line with where it ought to be if you want your peers to accept it.
I'm probably not at all the point either though haha. Actually, i posted a chapter from my novel on here and nobody commented on it. At least you got a reply!
Actually, thats not fair, somebody sent me a really nice personal message about it explaining why they enjoyed it and saying they'd be interested in reading more. I was pretty pleased that anybody enjoyed any fiction i'd wrote, seeing as normally the only time i get any praise is in my part time job as a music reviewer for a magazine. Which, to be perfectly honest isnt where i want to go with my literary interests, its just a hobby for me.
So yeah, stick at it. Even if you get nowhere fast, it can still be rewarding in its own way.
thanks. I have not read that much ellis--only lunar park--at least that is what I think it is called. too dark? it is true... but it is true
Didn't like it, sorry. It read as though a young child was trying to write about something he didn't fully understand. I don't doubt that you're in rehab, you've had a hard life blah blah blah, I'm just saying that's what it sounds like.
i have not had a hard life--okay what ever--I yunderstand it though trust me--maybe you don't get it.
you are entitled to your opion.
but, you ever here of tom waits--his music is about horrible shit --but the music is a lalaby
[QUOTE=Alexanderdeath25;1111168]
but, you ever here of tom waits--his music is about horrible shit --but the music is a lalaby[/QUOTE]
THAT is just nonsense!!
no it is not--it is like singing about killing a person to the tune of three blind mice
we sit watching the mist of the night come across the park. I blow my nose into a napkin and she nestles her head into my chest. I am thinking the whole time what a sad scene what a sad state of affairs . And the more you dissect and plunge into the depths of the situation the more sad and daunting and mocking and rabid it becomes—gnawing and tearing the city to shreds and turning a generation into a hopped up bunch of dead at 25’s.
you don't think that has power?
[QUOTE=elegantly_bitter;1111155]Didn't like it, sorry. It read as though a young child was trying to write about something he didn't fully understand. I don't doubt that you're in rehab, you've had a hard life blah blah blah, I'm just saying that's what it sounds like.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=Alexanderdeath25;1111168]i have not had a hard life--okay what ever--I yunderstand it though trust me--maybe you don't get it.
you are entitled to your opion.
but, you ever here of tom waits--his music is about horrible shit --but the music is a lalaby[/QUOTE]
See, if you read my post properly, I said that I believe you understand the drug culture and that you know from experience. BUT. That doesn't change the fact that you can't express yourself clearly and that you [I]sound[/I] like you don't know what you're talking about.
I've had some indirect experience with the subject, but that has nothing to do with your lack of cohesion and expression.
[QUOTE=Alexanderdeath25;1111142]thanks. I have not read that much ellis--only lunar park--at least that is what I think it is called. too dark? it is true... but it is true[/QUOTE]
You should read Less Than Zero, it'd show you exactly where you're going wrong if you want to write a full length novel like the short bit you posted. It might be of help to you, and if not, at least you've read a book considered a modern classic.
I dont rate it much myself, but i'd still say it's a must read.
thanks for the advice--and I can see what your saying about not expressing myself well--maybe you do not get it. thats okay
I think we all get it...
It's just done in a way that's sub-par.
You know?
Understanding is different than being immersed and enjoying.
We understand because it's right in front of us. It's just displayed in a jagged and rough manner.
You have good concepts and ideas, but your expression needs polishing.
Maybe you should read some books you've read before and see how the author conveys each emotion and style of scenario.
Yup, if you dont please the readers you dont have a book to sell and hopefully recieve praise for. You got to aim it at people, unless it's just for you. If it's just for you, then why post it here. Good luck though.
Sorry,but I didn`t enjoy ...I don`t see the meaning...
thats fine if you don't see the meaning--thaks for rewadin
Everything in the world has people who love it and people who hate it. Some of those people are pretentious, some of those people are ostentatious. Hope rehab helps.
rehab. I kind of wish I did not tell that. it is not what I am about--some people can do drugs and drink and be fine, I can't
I think my post was hard to understand. I wasn't referring to you as pretentious, just in case I didn't make that clear. And I wasn't trying to be an ass. I truly meant that I hope you get the help you need in rehab. My mom's an alcoholic and she's been sober for almost 8 years now after a few times in rehab. I didn't mean to put you down at all, sorry if it came out that way. So seriously, good luck. 
I gotta say this, you did something write if people tried to understand it. If it was just bad, they wouldn't have realized you were trying to go somewhere, they just would have thought it was supposed to be cool.
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I protest not getting a signature by writing this after each post.
"They sold you hippies grunge, hip hop, now liberty activism."
thanks for wrting replies.
didn't i just resond to this whats your fucking problem?