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tell me what you think

this is a continuation from my earlier posted Even Angels Couldn't Save You Now

i have changed the first part alot aswell, but i just started writing this, the second chapter. tell me what you think so far

 

XII. CityEgo sum panton quod sulum. Vacuus mihi illic est nusquam. Ego sum orbis terrarum.It wasn’t long after my black out in Colorado that I wound up in California, oh sweet smog and sin. Some people think of this place as the number one breeding ground for the deadly sins. You know; lust, greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, pride, and wrath. I call it heaven. No other place in the world thrives on so much drama; I mean hell, even the reporters here get paid to stretch the truth with phony photos and incriminating evidence. Beauty is everything, also. You look around and sixty is the new thirty. You look around and you see botox clinic after boob job clinic. You see Gucci next to Channel. Salon, strip club, salon, salon, store, salon. The restaurants here are all 5 stars, the kind of places that serve a meal the size of your fist and expect you to be full. This city isn’t all glamour though, there is a sick and twisted underworld. A place where the streets are ruled by gang activity,  the homicide department never sleeps. Hookers on every corner and strippers struggling to make ends meet. It is a place that some people might call a little racy, but I love it.You wake up with that fresh taste of pollution in your lungs and you take a good look outside your window where, thanks to the staggering ratio of cars and people to the total acreage, you only see a good 40 feet in front of you.