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Serious C*ck

Hi. I'm not going to tell you my name. I will tell you what they call me: The Night Dick. I come out at night like a fucking Vampire, I pick a place I just pick a place and go there like a fucking Vampire would. My pants are big and I wear a long sexy leather jacket. Women; they are so beautiful, I love their body parts. One of my favorite places to go is this Night Club called Black Bear. On Wednesday's they have karaoke and I love watching drunk girls sing P-P-P-P-Poker Face. I've been banging ladies for a while now, I'm a fucking pro. Different strategies for different scenarios. Instead of calling me Night Dick, they should call me The General. I am at war with myself and teh female race. I plan my attack, I prepare myself and then- I execute.

I was born in a Trailer park; my mother I believe was a crack ho. She told me once that my father gave jobs to women and earned a lot of money and had a straight reputation. I aspired to be him throughout my childhood, it was the love I had for my father and his reputation that made me aware of women. I should get to the dick part now, seeing as this is my second paragraph. When I came out of my mother's vagina the doctors were speechless. My mother cried, "Waaaaaaaaahh!! They be something wrong with my boy?! SPEAK TO ME DOCTOR, TELL ME PLEASE IS MY BOY OKAY?!!!" I was indeed okay. I had all ten fingers and toes, a good heart, all limbs. One thing was abnormal......my genitals were...capacious. My mother later said that during her labor with me, she thought it was an arm. As a boy, having such a huge penis was difficult. My crack ho mother would strap it to my leg with a thick rubber band that she too, even used sometimes. I ran away when I became a teenager. My dick was getting so big my mother basically shunned me. I slapped her like dad would've done and bounced.

One day I was at a public library. I saw a cute girl in one of the aisles and walked over to her. Told her I loved books and that she was pretty. She invited me back to her table and we sat there. I let her talk about Cormac McCarthy even though I fucking hate most of his work. My dick started to get hard and it hit her shoe. She looked down and moved her foot, I said sorry and she didn't know it was my dick. I thought about fucking a dead elderly in the ass to make the monster calm down. We went outside and decided to take a nice stroll down the trail behind the Library.

Definitely impressed her. She kept smiling and shit, total win. There was a bench under a willow tree, we sat down and I put my arm around her. Out of all the women, her tongue blew my mind the most. She pulled my pants down and saw it. Her mouth opened so wide, I felt obligated to put my gargantuan dick inside it. I closed my eyes in the anticipation of ultimate pleasure. I grabbed onto her smooth blonde hair and moved her head back and forth. The more I did it, the more aggressive it became. I COMPLETELY zoned out and heard nothing. Finally, I ejaculated. When I opened my eyes all I saw was blood and this bitch on the ground choking and gargle fucking n' shit. A few of her teeth were stuck on my dick, I didn't even feel it! I didn't know what to do, she was still kind of alive. So, I pulled my pants up strapped on my boot straps and started to run. I must admit that is one of my weaknesses, I cannot run fast or long enough. But I am strong. STRONG LIKE A FUCKING STALLION.

I Ist Knovwn

That thee garners
pleasvre from
the riding of
thine steeds

I hath placed a steed on
Thov steed so thee
May ride when Thov
Rides!