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Handy Manny

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Think of Handy Manny a.k.a. Manny Garcia (Mexican for Handy Man) as a more socially realistic but less politically correct version of Bob the Builder. Think of it as Bob the Builder and Dora the Explorer rolled into one Cheech and Chong sized joint.

I have never actually seen the show but I can only assume that Handy Manny spends most of his days chilling out and evading immigration officials in the Home Depot garden center while waiting for budget conscious suburbanites to offer him cash for tiling their kitchen's back splash or plant shrubberies.

Handy Manny speaks a language known as Spainglish a mix between Spanish, Mexican, English, and Canadian. According to my main man Alex Jones Spainglish is a language devised by NAFTA.

Anyways everyday I work, the first thing I do is run and pull Handy Manny off the shelf. He keeps me motivated and says motivational phrases whenever I tap his growing.

I'm the helpful handyman. How evil can I be?
With the right tool, we can do any job!
I need a tool that I can cut something with.

My manager says that I either have to leave Handy Manny on the shelf or buy him. Handy Manny is great and all but not twenty five dollars great. I also don't see the point in going into work without the very motivational words of Handy Manny. I guess it would be cool to actually be able to put the tools in his hands. I'm also not sure if I want to work somewhere that takes pleasure in my suffering.

I push shopping carts for a living. The money is fairly decent (I have saved enough money for the first year of college, so I guess thats good). Today we got a couple inches of snow. Pushing shopping carts in snow isn't the easiest thing in the world. I sort of like pushing carts in the snow and it is a great upper body workout. But from the outsider's point of view I look like some poor kid who is breaking his back and making minimum wage.